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I may not need to worry about buying a new car after all. My Aunt Stacy had saw my post on Facebook about my Versa yesterday and talked to her neighbor who's an actual mechanic. I took it over to her house this morning and after paying a little over $300 for the new manifold, he's working on it. He doesn't want any money for labor, so that's pretty amazing. I think, when I go to pick it up, I'll bring over a case of beer for him and my Uncle Greg to share, since my uncle got roped into helping as well. If all goes well and the new manifold is all that's needed, I'll be able to hold onto my Versa. It would take a lot of stress and worry away, because this whole situation has been super stressful for me. But, for once, things are actually working in my favor. So, big thanks to my aunt and uncle and their neighbor. I would be so fucked without their help.

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Gomez
23:19 Apr 30 2024

ah family. That is why despite my mothers hard lined rigid Catholicism and her sons obvious Satanic overtones; when she wants me to "cover up"; I do it. lol. Glad everything goes well for ya.

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I got my Versa back from the shop, so now I have to figure out how I'm going to sell it. I looked at Carmax, and the offer wasn't great, and I figure every dealership is going to be like that. So, I may just list it on some sites and see if I can't get someone interested. I hate that I have to sell it, I love that car and it still runs so well for its age and milage,but I just can't afford the repairs. I'm hoping someone who's a mechanic or knowledgeable with cars can pick it up and fix it themselves. The price for a new manifold is not that expensive, it's the labor that goes into replacing it that fucks you over at shops. And I, unfortunately, do not know anyone who could replace it for me. It would be so much easier if I did... But yeah, things to work out here. I've been looking into things I could easily sell for extra cash, and I have some clothing and my laptop that I could easily unload if need be.

Sometimes things in my life just line up. My eldest cousin is selling a '95 Chevy Camaro Z28 and I talked to him about possibly buying it from him, since my Versa is pretty much dead to me. He' s going to knock a thousand bucks off the price because we're family. And, i feel a lot better buying a used car from a family member over some random stranger who has no reason not to lie to me about the condition of the car. At least I know my cousin isn't going to fuck me over like that. So, all I have to do now I get rid of my Versa and finish Faire so I can buy this car.

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Vampirewitch39
23:53 Apr 26 2024

Yes, good news

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Gomez
02:23 Apr 27 2024

The 95 Camaro. is it black? either way....rock it.

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Well, I guess I'm going to be without a car for a while. Got the news from my mechanic that the crack in the manifold got way worse and it blew out the new O2 sensor they put in in January. So, I need a new manifold which I honestly can't afford. So, the best case is to just try and sell my little Versa and see what I can afford with whatever money I get for it. It still runs really well for as old as it is, and outside of the manifold, it's a good car. It's just annoying that it has to go this way. With everything else going on, this is not something I needed added to the pile.

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Gomez
02:18 Apr 26 2024

I feel your pain. keep ur head up.

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It was a looooong weekend at Faire. I don't think I've ever seen a Saturday so packed with people. Our line started around noon and didn't slow down at all until around 5. And I was told there was another rush around close at 7. I guess due to the rain the weekend before, everyone who had tickets to go then rescheduled them for this last weekend. Sunday wasn't much better. I know it's great for Andrew, for his business, but it was rough. And it didn't help that I was feeling like crap all day yesterday, and the heat was in the 80's and overwhelmingly sunny, which didn't help me feel better. But yeah, it was a busy, busy weekend. I'm so thankful for Logan and that fact that he was threr to bring me food and drinks and drive me home, and just take care of me. I'll never not appriciate everything that man does for me.

Next weekend will be fun, purely because it's RennCon weekend, which means a far wider array of costumes. This is the weekend when all the Trekkies, Whovians, and Star Wars characters are running around Faire, and it's always super fun. I have to ask Trevor if he's coming, I know he said he was going to try to make it sometime this season. And, I get to wear my Star Wars pins, which is always fun and opens the door for fun conversations with patrons. I'm sure the rest of Faire is going to be just as crowded as this last weekend, I've accepted that. It does mean I have to wake up just that much earlier to beat the lines at the Dam for parking. They apparently had to shut down the Dam because all the spots were taken by noon on Saturday. People had to park on the streets and walk in. One person was telling me how they had to walk two miles to get to Faire after they parked. I could never. Two miles in, then all day walking around the vast expanse that is Faire, then walking two miles out. That sounds like a nightmare to me. But, mad props to the people who managed it.

At some point this week I have to take my car back into the shop again. Getting the error for the O2 sensor which I had supposedly had fixed back in January. So, I'm not happy about that and how much it's potentially going to cost. But, I need my car to actually work, so it has to be done. I also have to talk to my mom about dinner with my brother. We decided that was the best course of action for now, taking him out to dinner and hearing what he has to say. Hopefully he's gotten back to her with a day he can do it. I wasn't able to check in over the weekend about it.

How do you convince a former Marine that doesn't think they need therapy that yes, they do in fact need to see a therapist for their PTSD? That using other means to self medicate is not healthy and is going to eventually wind up screwing their life up if they don't just kill themselves first? Outside of a full blown intervention, I don't know what to do. And even if we did a full on intervention, would it even make a difference? I don't want to lose my brother to his demons.

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Nightdrinker
07:04 Apr 21 2024

Show him his unusual behavior and let him question it.

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Sometimes you find things out about a family member that just makes you see them in a completely different light. I'm at my brother's house, watching my niece and nephew while Liz goes to a church thing. My brother moved out over this last weekend, so Liz doesn't have anyone else to watch the kids. Anyway, we were talking about her and my brother's separation and what brought it on...and I'm just at a loss. My brother isn't the person I thought he was. And what I did hear was concerning on a multitude of levels. I don't know if it's really my place to talk about it, though. Like, I want to talk to my parents about it, maybe we could talk to Kevin as a family. But then it's like, he's a grown ass adult, and he shouldn't have to be told by his parents and younger sister that his actions are inexcusable and worrisome. I don't know. I just feel like things need to be addressed, and if he doesn't take what I have to say into account, that's fine. At least I can say I tried, right? It's all just a mess. But, I did reassure Liz that at least I'll still be here for her. She's my family, even if her and Kevin do eventually get divorced. She's been a part of my life longer than she hasn't at this point, and I'm not going to just abandon her now that she is separated from my brother. It's not going to be the situation like what my dad's family did to my mom. So, at least she knows she still has us. I think she was really worried about that. But yeah... I don't know what to do with the information I have.

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Vampirewitch39
15:44 Apr 18 2024

Like you said, you can have your say and try to help. That is all you can do. And it will be handled by him alone.

My sister, at 60, still tells me off if she thinks I'm wrong. :)

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This was probably the worst weekend I've had at Faire since being accused of stealing and then fired by Nick. It was in the high 80's all last week, but come the weekend, we had a storm roll in. Saturday wasn't that bad, a better crowd than opening weekend, that's for sure. And while there was some rain, it kinda held off until later in the day so we had good business. Yesterday, however, sucked majorly. It started raining around 12:30 and didn't really stop until we closed. It was only four of us, which was nice, so I got to work longer hours. But yeah, the booth leaks, and with the wide opening in the front for us to take orders and hand out food, water was going to get in. It was less wet than standing out in the rain, but honestly, not by much. We did maybe 50 sales, so that was pretty abysmal. And we closed up shop before Faire was even over, shutting everything down around 6. There was honestly no point staying until 7, everyone was leaving. And then the walk back to my car was a hazard, as the parking lot turned into a swamp. I nearly slipped in the mud, thankfully I could catch myself before that happened because I would have just been done at that point. The one little bright side was that I got a rose yesterday. I'm not sure if the gentleman works for Faire or is just a really avid Ren Faire photographer hobbiest, but I've seen him every weekend for a few years now. He hands out roses to the pretty ladies all dressed up and takes their pictures, along with groups and booths, not just the pretty ladies. Thankfully he didn't take mine because I was a fucking mess at that point, but it was nice to get a rose for once. He kissed my hand and everything, though I made it super awkward since he didn't actually say anything, he just put the rose down in front of me and held his hand out for mine, and I just kinda weirdly started at him while he kissed it. So fucking awkward, haha. But yeah. This weekend was kinda shit. I went to bed at 8 on Saturday and then 10:30 last night, I wanted to hold out and talk to Logan for a bit. I really forget how exhausting Faire can make really be. Hopefully next weekend will be better, at least it's not supposed to rain. And it's Cottagecore weekend, which means all the girlies in their stupid mushroom hats will be there. I don't understand the mushroom craze, but whatever. So long as we do better business.

Checking up on the forecast for this weekend... Saturday it's projected to rain pretty much all day, which is going to make it a shitty day at Faire. I don't think I've ever worked a day where it's full on rained at Faire before. So, I don't know... I can't imagine a lot of people will up and brave rain just to wander around Faire for hours. And Sunday it's projected to possibly rain during the afternoon. I guess I'm thankful I'm off the ground and up in a wooden box, as opposed to just tents, but still. If it does rain, I'm sure it's going to be pretty miserable.

First weekend of Ren Faire down, six more to go! It was actually a really nice weekend, sunny but highs only in the mid 60's. Unfortunately, that didn't really get people out to Faire, as it was a pretty slow opening weekend. The slowest I've seen since I started working Faire. I guess with the rain on Friday and with what happened last year with opening weekend being delayed a week, that just kinda put people off. I am really hoping it gets better and the crowds return, because I can't do these slow days. However, it's fun to be back in garb and getting to people watch and talk with excited Faire goers. Faire season is my favorite season.

Though, I don't know, next weekend might be a bit of a wash too, since it's supposed to rain on Saturday. We're just not having any luck this year. But, I feel like once we get out of April, May is going to be the perfect time for people to go to Faire. But, you never know. I'm just really hoping ths season picks up as it's the last one I'll be working here before Logan and I move to Texas.


Also, I just noticed, it's my 18th anniversary here on VR. 18 years, man, where does the time go?

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Vampirewitch39
18:37 Apr 09 2024

Happy 18!

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The complete and utter lack of communication from Andrew this year regarding Faire is aggrivating. Texts go unanswered. Faire starts on Saturday, and I'm not even sure what's going on, since he hasn't reached out. The last I heard from him was last Saturday, when he sent "I will be reaching out with more info here shortly". I've heard nothing from him since, despite me reaching out yesterday. I have no idea where the booth is located this year, when I need to be there on Saturday, things that are pretty important. Finding out where the booth is isn't hard, I mean, it means a little more walking around in the morning, but whatever, the food area is not huge, it's just annoying that things are so unorganized this season.

I don't often talk about certain experiences I've had in my life. There are things I am perfectly fine with burying so deep inside of me, hidden from everyone in the darkest parts of me. But...then I have a dream that's more memory than dream and I'm forced to acknowledge it, my brain forcing me to face it when I do everything in my power to just forget.

It's not been a good few nights for me... I've been having a lot of awful dreams. Granted, it's nothing like the nightmares I've become so accustomed to, but some of these dreams have really hit me hard. It makes sleep something I dread. I'm getting pretty tired of waking up in tears. Left in the darkness, feeling so broken, so empty and hollow.