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i'm thinking about religion, which is odd for me, i don't normally write about it. i don't talk about it, it no way to i show how i feel to the world as far as religion goes. that's because it makes me very uncomfortable.



i was raised in such a way that i feel really terrible about anything that can be considered insulting to someone else. i'm very sensitive in what i discuss with people, on certain topics. religion is one of these topics. everyone has thier own beliefs on God or the lack of there of.



this is my thoughts.



i believe in God, but not in the christan bible reading church going type. i don't believe that he hates gays or unbaptised babies. sex isn't bad to him, that's just our limitations and inihibitions coming through. for years we were told that God hates masterbation and would make you go blind.



i also don't care what you call him, which is why i haven't capitlized him by the way. God is just one of his titles, and him is just the sex by which i think of him, and refer to him... i don't think he's limited by a sex like us.



i'm scared to think of God most of the time. i feel like if i think about him for too long then i'll trap myself. the more you consider what you do in life, and what you don't do, the more ashamed you feel. it's this uncontrolable world that makes us act the way we do, and it's the way we act that has made the world so uncontrolable. before we stepped in and messed everything up, the world ran on a perfect system, always refreshing itself and continuing a line of evolution. is that an accident? could be i guess, and in some minds it is, an accident i mean. but with the statistics and the chances, could it really happen on it's own?



the one thing that gets me is what was before God. i can't figure that one out. i've come to the conclusion that my tiny human brain can't comprehend the question properly. it's like that word puzzle that makes you think there's a dollar missing, but the numbers all add up right. it's the way it's presented to you that changes how you feel on a situation.

can a subbie rape a dom? i think i just did

today i figured something out, and i'm not sure if it's cheating or not.



see nine times out of ten when i'm earning favor i'm not on the site. i open the window, log in, get the hangman going and then close down VR...





i've found a while ago that it'll still give you the favor even if there's no other VR page... and the refreshing rules apply too, you can get logged out.



however, i'm not sure if this affects the page viewed or the time spent, and if it does then i might be considered cheating for the way i do it... i should message Cancer and see what he says.