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12 entries this month
14:13 Jun 26 2008
Times Read: 778
After two graduate degrees and licensure beyond that, I am going back to school. :)
Only one class - but a class for ME. Digital photography- Yeah ME!! It will be on Thursday nights from 6-9. I might even be sharing in my portfolio this fall. :)
17:50 Jun 24 2008
Times Read: 790
The sun is shining. I am alive. I am mostly healthy. I have my basic needs met and several of my wants. I am loved by family and friends. I am respected by coworkers and people in the community who know what I do. I have an education. I see the beauty around me and in others. I see the connections in the circle of life. Most days I have a positive outlook.
And yet, there is an empty dark void within.
A loss of sense of self, of who I want to be, who I was MEANT to be.
My first time skinny dipping
01:34 Jun 20 2008
Times Read: 823
I went skinny dipping tonight for the first time. I am house sitting my cousin's who has this huge public size pool. It is surrounded by trees and fields that they own so it is rather secluded.
I put on my cover and went for it tonight. I was in the water for about 45 min. It was freeing and anxiety provoking as I kept thinking someone would pop out of the trees or come up the drive. I had the towel and cover handy but it being my first time I was still in the "nekkid bad in public" mode.
IT was WONDERFUL. The water could have been a tad warmer but hey it was great.
Made me think all kinds of naughty things.:)
My company was a huge tabby cat who laid stretched out poolside to watch. Then when I was coming back to the house a deer was in the yard. The deer stood and watched me and waited like "ok you are interupting my feeding time" so I came on into the house, the deer watching me the whole time. After I shut the door, I looked out the window...the deer had started eating again. The tabby had followed me and lay stretched out on the sidewalk under the window.
I could SO get used to this! :)
01:26 Jun 20 2008
Times Read: 824
The ongoing Dell saga - Get this..they are sending an optical drive, a usb port and a motherboard......to a technician who will COME TO MY HOUSE to fix the laptop.
Will wonders never cease? I just hope the technician is not coming from India and does speak English.....or it will be a long wait and s/he will be very lost in the small Kentucky town.
Supposedly this should all be taken care of by Tuesday. Business days - weekends do not count. Just as well as I am not home anyway this weekend.
I am guessing - with the cost of the tech, mileage, parts and labor, they could have sent me a new one for what it will cost them.
But you know what - as much time as I have spent on the phone with them (and VW too once) with this laptop...they can dang well absorb the cost.
17:49 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 830
AGAIN with Dell. I HATE DELL!!!!
The reason for doing the reboot was because it would not read cds. Well....it STILL does NOT read them.
So..now they are sending me an optical drive. Just hope I don't crawl thru the phone line and strangle someone on that one when I have to call to get it installed.
Oh and I have to call a DIFFERENT number to get the games back. GRRRRRR
Did I mention....I HATE DELL???
02:59 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 843
I HATE DELL and I am beginning to VERY MUCH dislike computers in general.
Let me repeat.....I HATE DELL.
I spent off and on over 8 hours yesterday online with them to reboot my computer soft ware..for the THIRD FREAKING TIME.
Not one person does the whole thing either. There is a different department for Windows, then, wireless, and then another for the printer.
And.......it STILL FREAKING DOES NOT WORK. I still cannot play cd's on it and am afraid to try to upload the Photoshop program I bought - afraid it will screw it up too. None of the Yahoo games I used to play will now work either.
AND I lost the program for Word. (yeah that is a hint to bum Cat.)
Let me repeat...
I HATE DELL.
PRIVATE ENTRY
03:15 Jun 16 2008
Times Read: 844
• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •
22:19 Jun 13 2008
Times Read: 863
I took the quiz in VW's journal and this is what I got -
Type of Trot: Slow Walker
What Your Walk Says: Some may be annoyed by a slow walker, assuming that they are ineffective, but certain types of jobs may appreciate it as a sign that you are thoughtful and detail oriented.
Work for Your Walk: A career where being careful counts, like in healthcare.
Quick Fix: If you’re a slow walker, don’t feel the need to speed up for the sake of appearances. Instead, provide your boss or potential employer with a list of projects that you’ve completed in the recent past to prove your effectiveness.
I did inpatient healthcare 10 years full time and 8 part time - and I walk VERY Slow.
03:15 Jun 12 2008
Times Read: 895
Huh.,I got rated a 1.......thought that stuff was over...but no......some whelp did it.
Oh well...
Didn't rate the profile and you will not find the name here.
That would be giving too much credence.
Dad and canned beef stew
01:59 Jun 04 2008
Times Read: 917
I learned something today that is both very trivial and very sentimental.
My Dad and I were talking on the phone. He told me that Mom had opened up some canned beef stew for dinner.
He said, "I had to work at eating it becuase I ate so much of it when your Mom was pregnant with you that I got burned out on it. I ate it every night while she was pregnant seemed like. She was teaching and going to school and I guess she didn't feel like cooking. It was alright, but I just got sick of it and haven't been able to eat it much since."
Kudos to Dad for eating it even when tired of it.
Kudos to Mom for working, going to school AND being pregnant with me.
19:03 Jun 03 2008
Times Read: 928
I love to read, I LOVE to read. But reading good books.....makes me entirely useless for anything else.
Why?
Because, I stay up late to read, thus I sleep in.
I pick the book up first thing to start reading, I read until the book is finished. Nothing else gets done (not even eating, SHOCK SHOCK). Nothing.
You know what?
I don't give a big booger.
I LOVE to read good books!!!
Book finished.....off to get food, clothing, and work done.
17:50 Jun 01 2008
Times Read: 944
Sometimes for no real reason, at least none I can point to and say that is the reason, I feel exposed and raw in my emotions.
What triggers this? Memories? A negative encounter with someone? Stress? Lonliness? Shock? Loss? The electricity in the air before a storm? A brush with death? All of these I have experienced.
Is the rawness ever positive in nature? I have not found it to be so lately, but I have felt it. When? When love is new and shiny and unexpected and it hits you out of nowhere.
Lately, I have felt the negativeness in brief periods or flashes, I feel it inside.If it were longer periods, I am not sure I could stand it right now. There is nothing I can point to as of yet to say this is why.
Sometimes, I see those brief flashes of rawness in others around me. There is nothing I can do. They do not want me to see those flashes and out of defference to thier wishes, I usually ignore them. But I do see them, and it hurts me too.
Do we have to do this alone? Why?
I do not think it has to be alone. I think if we acknowledge it, take it out of the darkness of ourselves, share it with someone, it becomes easier..if not goes away completely.
Others can help bring light to the darkness, if you let them.
If I let them.
COMMENTS
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Sinora
14:35 Jun 26 2008
Look forward to seeing the results.
LadyChordewa
19:53 Jun 26 2008
Nightgame
02:55 Jun 27 2008
I'm really tickled you're doing this sugar, you deserve some time for you.