How can so much love also bring the hurt within our souls? This has always baffled me in the sense of no acknowledgement. For are we puzzled by the way the other is treated in the fact of more friends, better job, or just ethically correct in society. For not every person is created equal and they do have flaws. That’s what makes us so unique among the others. Few shall achieve stature or riches that others may never obtain. So do we ridicule these individuals or do we except them the way they are. Some have hidden troubles within their minds and can’t cope with situations that may arise. I have been told that since me and my mother had shared no love between us that my idea of women will always be compounded for I don’t respect them, or show the anger of my mother at them.
This has confused me several times that I was told this, Yet in my mind, I feel that this is right to a certain point. For I am very protective of my emotions towards the opposite sex and they have to prove the love in their soul is the love that they say is there. For I don’t trust them totally by the words that are spoke only the love that they show me. I felt if I was never truly loved as a child and my idea of a strong relationship is filled with the love of the centuries that nothing in this green earth would ever destroy. By this I mean the closeness of the family, doing things together, Love when we are together{ like laying on the couch cuddling, sexual pleasure at weird times; Just to say they can’t keep their hands off of you.) and the willingness to grow together.
Can this much closeness mean that there is no time apart. No after the initial family and boundaries of the love have been set, then the freedom of the cool breeze shall be everywhere. For when a couple has reached that top plateau they shall do everything together in a sense, and when they go out alone and enjoy the time by themselves or achieved satisfaction in the work place it shall be received in the family as still togetherness. For no matter how far they are separated that love that they strived for and reached shall still be intact.
Has my mind become dark, for this society has become a trap for me, these days seem to linger more with no end in sight. The concrete maze I call this world has seemed to give me more twists and turns and still I have yet to find the exit for which I longer for. My mind which was free to fly to my dreams seem to collide for what I cannot achieve. I longer to escape this concrete maze and set my mind free, with in the writing, yes within my written I shall, for I have never been hampered by this lives confusion, nor do I insist in being wrapped up in the dram of what life seem to cover me with. Random thoughts upon the pages here to show me an escape, to help me tear down the walls that seem to close in on me. I feel lost or is it a drain from the work, and burdens of life. Yet I should follow the rules I set upon others where the story of words become my escape to another place, feelings of my inner soul to my friends and my own sanity. For if this person is to break the chains of insanity I must escape, to write become free.
I feel better when words seem to be my guide to my heart, for others seem to dwell on material things in this life, neh not me for my strength is the feelings I have come to hide, to tell of stories and words in the simple yet poetic symbols upon the whiten pages of life. To escape here or into the doors of my mind seem to even bar me from reaching, yet I shall not falter and hopefully the words expressed will help ease the pain of this mixed up world and those that seem to cling to my esurience that this world is not as bad as it seems. Many friends find reinsurance in the words they find here, and for me I found words of inspiration in the words they have to offer in what I consume from them. To write, to live to dream, make others feel the words and break the chains that bond them to this concrete society of the hustle and bustle of what they know. My heart sheds a tear for them and the pains and ambitions I feel within.
To write, to dream to live, this is what we need to make the history in life more sensible to us and our friends. Ramblings of my thoughts…..yet unclear the passage to take, but I shall find the place to set us free…..
In many cases this is very hard for us to do, for every person that is around us and interacts with us make us who we are today. Complete circles that intertwine with each other; breaking off and joining other circles. That is how I describe our lives with everybody around us. For we are connected in a certain way to those we have met in everyday life. Depression has led to circumstances in society that humans have yet to grasp the true meaning of this disease. Alcoholism, even the unthinkable act of suicide is attributed to this disease we call depression. But these people have to realize that the way to a healthier tomorrow is to start within themselves today. And if we make these people realize that they make a difference in our society and that tomorrow holds a bountiful resource yet to come, they might realize that we are here to help them on the path to the unknown future.
But these are my feelings of how they may come to pass. For within my soul I’m a very emotional person, and I’m here to help those that I hold dear to me, Yet in my life, I have met with bouts of all of this and come to realize that this not a perfect world.. Yet I push on with my life trying to make it the best I could possibly do., No matter the tragedy that has come to pass, I have dealt with it and moved on to the new tomorrow. I have crawled within myself many times for this outside world scares me and makes me feel less than human sometimes. Yet I try to hold my head high and dream of a perfect life in the near future
COMMENTS
I love your perspective. I have been struggling a lot this year, so I really identify with what you are saying. I, too, am attempting to hold my head up and plug on. Unfortunately, making the decision to remove some toxic people from my life has left me with fewer people to interact with. However, I decided that it was better than to continue to interact with all that toxicity.
Sometimes we must interact with the issues. Because the lines of life say that they are intertwined with us tell one of depart from the circle we walk.
Death among all other acts that we encounter in life is the one that we all fear the most. Why, for we do not understand its purpose or meaning that holds on us. Death is always been dark, cruel and the very potential of all evil. Death is always around no matter where you look. For it covers the pages of our newspapers, television sets, or even the loved one’s that our dear to our hearts. We try to come to grasps with this act of god, but yet we are still uneasy and turn away to the talking of death. Death should be realized as a possible new beginning in our lives. For we believe that heaven does exist, or another plane were our souls venture too live out our lives once more. Yet we are all afraid to die for we do not know what lies behind that total black obis. I have come to terms with death, for I have seen its face and the many aspects of it’s coat. Working in a cemetery and morgue has given me a sight which I hold within myself For in fact, I to am scared of the face of death yet come to except it on it’s terms. But as long as I breathe and live my life, I will try to do everything that I possibly can. For as when I sit at 90 years old in my rocking chair and look back at the life that I have done; I don’t want to ever hear me say “I wish I would have done this or done it different.”
We should all be proud of the accomplishments that we have achieved in our lives. Try to make the next new day different than the one we just had; for if we do this, then the world will be controlled by us; not this big world controlling us. Take a stand for what you believe to be right and be yourselves, not what this world dictates or what it wants you to be. For if we learn the concepts of life they still will be a mystery, yet stay back and smell the flowers once in a great while. You might realize that this world is what you want it to be.
Is a woman so pure and her soul without guilt, that she can portray no physical emotion in her being. For when they are so wrapped in that we call life, that they sometimes forget the true friends or the lovers that had occupied their very existence. For they have walked over these souls to achieve their utmost goals and given them the overwhelming passion that entrances their very heart and desires. Do we call this thing greed or is it dreams that are destined to be on ones life.
Can a woman be so innocent in her own mind’s eye that she refuses to remember that she has let down her wary locks and laid her silken naked body down in the golden meadows, amongst the flowers with their fragrances sweet and God’s creatures singing to the heavens? And has made passionate, unforgettable love and desire to the devil himself and she’s enjoyed the heat from his mouth against her bosom. Then spreads her creamy white thighs and she feels his serpent tongue flicker against her swollen rose bud sending tingling sensations through her very spine. And has felt his fleshy spear penetrate deep in her tight womb; spreading her pink, moist lips around his organ as he brings her to an ecstasy that she feels flooding her mind, clouding her thoughts that are so pure. They thrall there amongst the colorful eyes in the meadows and in the heavens itself And as she tastes the sweet nectar that shoots like a bullet from his massive organ and fills her dry mouth with the very life that entrances her not so desirable soul.
COMMENTS
I hope not offend anyone with this posts just words scrambling thru my mind.
Wow thats very descriptive and very intriguing
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