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silentwoman's Journal


silentwoman's Journal

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11 entries this month
 

~stripped pt 2~

19:06 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 584




Sorry if I ain't perfect

Sorry I don't give a -what-

Sorry I ain't a diva

Sorry just know what I want

Sorry I'm not a virgin

Sorry I'm not a slut

I won't let you break me

Think what you want



To all my dreamers out there - I'm with you

All my underdogs, ha - I feel you

Lift your head high and stay strong

Keep pushin' on


COMMENTS

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~stripped pt 1~

19:06 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 585




I've waited a long time for this

It feels right now

Allow me to introduce myself

I want you to come a little closer

I'd like you to get to know me a little bit better

Meet the real me



Sorry you can't define me

Sorry I break the mold

Sorry that I speak my mind

Sorry don't do what I'm told

Sorry if I don't fake it

Sorry I come too real

I will never hide what I really feel



Huh, so here it is

No hype, no gloss, no pretense

Just me

Stripped



COMMENTS

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~beautiful~

19:05 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 586




Spoken:

Don't look at me



Every day is so wonderful

And suddenly, it's hard to breathe

Now and then, I get insecure

From all the fame, I'm so ashamed



I am beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring me down

I am beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring me down

So don't you bring me down today



To all your friends, you're delirious

So consumed in all your doom

Trying hard to fill the emptiness

The piece is gone and the puzzle undone

That's the way it is



You are beautiful no matter what they say

Words won't bring you down

You are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words won't bring you down

Don't you bring me down today...



No matter what we do

(no matter what we do)

No matter what they say

(no matter what they say)

When the sun is shining through

Then the clouds won't stay



And everywhere we go

(everywhere we go)

The sun won't always shine

(sun won't always shine)

But tomorrow will find a way

All the other times



We are beautiful no matter what they say

Yes, words won't bring us down

We are beautiful no matter what they say

Yes, words can't bring us down

Don't you bring me down today



Don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today


COMMENTS

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~by my self~

18:55 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 589




By Myself



What do I do to ignore them behind me?

Do I follow my instincts blindly?

Do I hide my pride / from these bad dreams

And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?

Do I / sit here and try to stand it?

Or do I / try to catch them red - handed?

Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness,

Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?

Because I can’t hold on / when I’m stretched so thin

I make the right moves but I’m lost within

I put on my daily façade but then

I just end up getting hurt again



by myself [myself]

I ask why, but in my mind

I find I can’t rely on myself



[myself]

I ask why, but in my mind

I find I can’t rely on myself



I can’t hold on

To what I want when I’m stretched so thin

It’s all too much to take in

I can’t hold on

To anything watching everything spin

With thoughts of failure sinking in



If I

Turn my back I’m defenseless

And to go blindly seems senseless

If I hide my pride and let it all go on / then they’ll

Take from me ‘till everything is gone

If I let them go I’ll be outdone

But if I try to catch them I’ll be outrun

If I’m killed by the questions like a cancer

Then I’ll be buried in the silence of the answer



[by myself]

[myself]

I ask why, but in my mind

I find I can’t rely on myself

[myself]

I ask why, but in my mind

I find I can’t rely on myself



I can’t hold on

To what I want when I’m stretched so thin

It’s all too much to take in

I can’t hold on

To anything watching everything spin

With thoughts of failure sinking in



How do you think / I’ve lost so much

I’m so afraid / I’m out of touch

How do you expect / I will know what to do

When all I know / Is what you tell me to

Don’t you (know)

I can’t tell you how to make it (go)

No matter what I do, how hard I (try)

I can’t seem to convince myself (why)

I’m stuck on the outside



How do you think / I’ve lost so much

I’m so afraid / I’m out of touch

How do you expect / I will know what to do

When all I know / Is what you tell me to

Don’t you (know)

I can’t tell you how to make it (go)

No matter what I do, how hard I (try)

I can’t seem to convince myself (why)

I’m stuck on the outside



I can’t hold on

To what I want when I’m stretched so thin

It’s all too much to take in

I can’t hold on

To anything watching everything spin

With thoughts of failure sinking in



I can’t hold on

To what I want when I’m stretched so thin

It’s all too much to take in

I can’t hold on

To anything watching everything spin

With thoughts of failure sinking...


COMMENTS

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~CAROUSEL~

18:53 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 590




She can't hide no matter how hard she tries

Her secret disguised behind the lies

And at night she cries away her pride

With eyes shut tight staring at her inside

All her friends know why she can't sleep at night

All her family asking is she alright

All she wants to do is get rid of this hell

Well all she's got to do is stop kiddin herself

She can only fool herself for so long

She can only fool herself for so long

She can only fool herself for so long

I'm too weak to face me

(She can only fool herself)



I never know just why you run so far away far away from me

I never know just why you run so far away far away from me



When it comes to how to live his life he can't be told

Says he got everything under control

Thinks he knows he's not a problem he's stuck with

But in reality it would be a problem to just quit

An addict and he can't hold the reigns

The pain is worse cause his friends have it the same

Tries to slow down the problem he's got

But can't get off the carousel until he makes it stop

He can only fool himself for so long

He can only fool himself for so long

He can only fool himself for so long

I'm too weak to face me

(He can only fool himself)



I never know just why you run so far away far away from me

I never know just why you run so far away far away from me



[Background stuff]

I never know just why you run so far away far away from me

I never know just why you run so far away far away from me

I never know just why you run so far away far away from me

I never know just why you run so far away far away from


COMMENTS

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~crawling~

18:52 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 591




crawling in my skin

these wounds they will not heal

fear is how I fall

confusing what is real





there's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface

consuming/confusing

this lack of self-control I fear is never ending

controlling/I can't seem





to find myself again

my walls are closing in

(without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)

I've felt this way before

so insecure



crawling in my skin

these wounds they will not heal

fear is how I fall

confusing what is real



discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me

distracting/reacting

against my will I stand beside my own reflection

it's haunting how I can't seem...



to find myself again

my walls are closing in

(without a sense of confidence and I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)

I've felt this way before

so insecure



crawling in my skin

these wounds they will not heal

fear is how I fall

confusing what is real



crawling in my skin

these wounds they will not heal

fear is how I fall

confusing confusing what is real



there's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface

consuming/confusing what is real

this lack of self-control I fear is never ending

controlling/confusing what is real


COMMENTS

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~pints of authority~

18:51 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 592




Points Of Authority



Forfeit the game / Before somebody else

Takes you out of the frame / Puts your name to shame

Cover up your face / You can’t run the race

The pace is too fast / You just won't last



You love the way I look at you

While taking pleasure in the awful things you put me through

You take away if I give in

My life

My pride is broken



You like to think you’re never wrong

(You live what you’ve learned)

You have to act like you’re someone

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want someone to hurt like you

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to share what you’ve been through

(You live what you’ve learned)



You love the things I say I’ll do

The way I’ll hurt myself again just to get back at you

You take away when I give in / my life

My pride is broken



You like to think you’re never wrong

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to act like you’re someone

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want someone to hurt like you

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to share what you’ve been through

(You live what you’ve learned)



Forfeit the game / Before somebody else

Takes you out of the frame / Puts your name to shame

Cover up your face / You can’t run the race

The pace is too fast / You just won't last



You like to think you’re never wrong

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to act like you’re someone

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want someone to hurt like you

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to share what you’ve been through

(You live what you’ve learned)



You like to think you’re never wrong / forfeit the game

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to act like you’re someone / forfeit the game

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want someone to hurt like you / forfeit the game

(You live what you’ve learned)

You want to share what you’ve been through / forfeit the game

(You live what you’ve learned)


COMMENTS

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~paper cut~

18:50 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 593




Papercut



Why does it feel like night today?

Something in here’s not right today

Why am I so uptight today?

Paranoia’s all I got left

I don’t know what stressed me first

Or how the pressure was fed / but

I know just what it feels like

To have a voice in the back of my head

It’s like a face that I hold inside

A face that awakes when I close my eyes

A face watches every time I lie

A face that laughs every time I fall

(And watches everything)

So I know that when it’s time to sink or swim

That the face inside is hearing me / right beneath my skin

It’s like I’m / paranoid lookin’ over my back

It’s like a / whirlwind inside of my head

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

It’s like the face inside is right beneath my skin

I know I’ve got a face in me

points out all the mistakes to me

You’ve got a face on the inside too and

Your paranoia’s probably worse

I don’t know what set me off first but I know what I can’t stand

Everybody acts like the fact of the matter is

I can’t add up to what you can but

Everybody has a face that they hold inside

A face that awakes when they close their eyes

A face watches every time they lie

A face that laughs every time they fall

(And watches everything)

So you know that when it’s time to sink or swim

That the face inside is watching you too / right inside your skin

It’s like I’m / paranoid lookin’ over my back

It’s like a / whirlwind inside of my head

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

It’s like the face inside is right beneath my skin



It’s like I’m / paranoid lookin’ over my back

It’s like a / whirlwind inside of my head

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

It’s like the face inside is right beneath my skin



the face inside is right beneath my skin

the face inside is right beneath my skin

the face inside is right beneath my skin



The sun goes down

I feel the light betray me



The sun goes down

I feel the light betray me



The sun

It’s like I’m / paranoid lookin’ over my back

It’s like a / whirlwind inside of my head

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

It’s like the face inside is right beneath my skin

I feel the light betray me



The sun

It’s like I’m / paranoid lookin’ over my back

It’s like a / whirlwind inside of my head

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

I feel the light betray me

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within

It’s like I / can’t stop what I’m hearing within


COMMENTS

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~one step closer~

18:49 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 594




I cannot take this anymore

I'm saying everything I've said before

All these words they make no sense

I find bliss in ignorance

Less I hear the less you'll say

But you'll find that out anyway

Just like before...



Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break



I find the answers aren't so clear

Wish I could find a way to disappear

All these thoughts they make no sense

I find bliss in ignorance

Nothing seems to go away

Over and over again

Just like before...



Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Break break break break break



shut up when I'm talking to you

shut up shut up shut up

shut up when I'm talking to you

shut up shut up shut up shut up

I’m about to break



Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Break break break break break break



shut up when I'm talking to you

shut up shut up shut up

shut up when I'm talking to you

shut up shut up shut up shut up

I’m about to break



Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breathe

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break


COMMENTS

-



 

~with you~

18:47 Nov 07 2006
Times Read: 595




I woke up in a dream today

To the cold of the static and put my cold feet on the floor

Forgot all about yesterday

Remembering I'm pretending to be where I'm not anymore

A little taste of hypocrisy

And I'm left in the wake of the mistake slow to react

Even though you're so close to me

You're still so distant

And I can't bring you back



It's true the way I feel

Was promised by your face

The sound of your voice

Painted on my memories

Even if you're not with me

I'm with you



You, now I see, keeping everything inside

with you

You, Now I see, Even when I close my eyes



I hit you and you hit me back

We fall to the floor the rest of the day stands still

Fine line between this and that

When things go wrong I pretend the past isn't real

I'm trapped in this memory

And I'm left in the wake of the mistake slow to react

So even though you're close to me

You're still so distant

And I can't bring you back



It's true the way I feel

Was promised by your face

The sound of your voice

Painted on my memories

Even if you're not with me

I'm with you



You, now I see, keeping everything inside

with you

You, Now I see, Even when I close my eyes

With you

You, now I see, keeping everything inside

with you

You, Now I see, Even when I close my eyes



No, no matter how far we've come

I can't wait to see tomorrow

No, no matter how far we've come I

I can't wait to see tomorrow



With you

You, now I see, keeping everything inside

with you

You, Now I see, Even when I close my eyes

With you

You, now I see, keeping everything inside

with you

You, Now I see, Even when I close my eyes


COMMENTS

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*brain washing*

15:52 Nov 01 2006
Times Read: 598




11/1/2006

Once again i'm sitting in this god for saken classroom doing shit that makes no since and has absolutely no point to it. I mean come on if i’m going to waste my time on some thing I at least want to benefit from it. Does this make any since? Well it sure as hell does to me I sit in six different class rooms a day listening to six different teachers blab on about god only knows what and him just sick of it. They say that education is important for life but im m not learning anything that I would die with out these people expect us to take all of thease classes leading to believe that “we NEED to know this” bull shit half of the classes im taking right now are totalty pointless

right now im failing most of my classes because i just dont give a damn. yes i ranting again but what can i say.


COMMENTS

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