The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

They have been expecting you.

They knew eventually you'd show up.

It won't be possible for you to know

what is happening, so I'll fill you in.



The beginning for you will be

when you stagger to your car.

The beginning for them will be

when a bulletin goes out

on the police radio reporting

a serious accident.









You won't hear the sirens

The ambulance and police car will

arrive almost at the same time.

They will check you over and

pronounce you dead.

A few curious motorists who heard

the crash will stop and look at

your broken body, some of them will get sick.







The ambulance driver will roll out a

stretcher.The attendant will stuff your hands

under your belt and grab you

under your arms. The driver of

the ambulance will take hold

of your legs, You will be

placed on the stretcher and covered

with a blanket.

They will drive you to the coroner's

office,where a deputy coroner will

wheel you over to a big

scale. He will remove the blanket,

shake his head and say, "Another One."



Your clothes will be cut off with

scissors. You will be weighed and measured.

The deputy coroner will make a record

of your injuries, cover you up again

and wheel you to a small room

with hoses and white tile walls.

Traffic victims are almost always

a bloody mess.



You will be cleaned up as much

as possible and moved to a long

hall with several stretchers lined

up against pale green walls.

In that hall are 41 crypts, If it

has been a slow evening, you wiil have

a stretcher and a crypt all to yourself.

But, if it's Christmas, New Years

or Memorial Day weekend or any number

of many excuses for drinking or drugs,

you probably will have a lot of company.



They wil go away and leave you

there in the quietest room in town.

In an hour or so, they will come

and move you again. You will

be placed behind a large glass

window so your wife, husband, parents or

a friend can identify you. You

won't see the agony and pain in thier

eyes, and it's just as well.

Nor will you hear the screams and sobbing

when they lower the sheet and ask

"Is this your husband... wife... son...

daughter... brother...sister... friend?"





As I was saying, they are waiting

for you -- the police, the ambulance crews,

the coroners at the morgue and the

morticians, they are expecting you!!!



So remember this tonight, when you toss

down that last drink, or smoke

that last joint, or take one last

snort of cocaine, and climb

behind the wheel of your car.