Whatever i want it to be23:37 Jul 11 2008
Times Read: 609
Jun. 8th, 2008
what ever i want
The world with its wasteful sense of time has no awareness of my existence so why should I analogue its own? It laughs at my pain, causes it, and doesn’t’ stop a beat unless the whole world knows you. What about those of us only known by a few and forgotten as time goes by? Everyone is looking to change the world when it is already changing itself and needs no help from anyone of us. One person saving the world, that’s only for action movies and Saturday morning cartoons. They tell you that so they don’t have to higher one million people to make their movies. It’s all fake and unstable. You are lead to believe that what you call your rock foundation is actually nothing but threads of string ready to snap and let you crash towards the jagged rocks below. You have only you and those who love you, no one else matters. No! No one else matters!!!! Don’t you see? Everyone who doesn’t love you is only killing you, slowly ending your existence! People don’t commit suicide; people who tormented them and hurt, they made their lives not worth living for. I’m not suicidal or angry I just know what it’s like to be hated and hate them back even more. I know what it’s like to be sad and alone. Do you know what else I know? I know how to get up, to take what they give me and give it back twofold. I know how to hate, to want them to die but I also learned how to move on.
My name is useless to you so I will not tell you. Knowing who you are is more important. Do you know? I said do you know who you are? If you don’t then stop reading this, find out who you are and come back. Since you are continuing to read this, you must know exactly who you are. I hope you don’t think you are the son/ daughter of whomever because you are not, you are you. They made you but that doesn’t you are them. You are the only that can make you who you are.
I won’t lie to you the world can be a nice place depending where you live and who it’s with. I’ve had my share of great places and hell holes, but I think in the long-run it made who I am today. Who am I? I am the individual that really is an individual, I am the kinky virgin, I am the one who doesn’t party or drink and I am the one who wrote this. Many people write things that could be true but are not and others write their life’s story, I’ll let you decide about me. Don’t bother telling what you think about it because I won’t care or listen.
I can come off as a rude person but I’m not it’s just I wrote this and it’s mine so I don’t need your input on what I wrote. It comes from many years of people citizen me when it was none of their business. It’s a free country, so they tell you, but they feel that you have to be them. I don’t want to be you or like anyone else. I want to be me and not hear your opinion. Is that something that can be accomplished? NO! Everyone feels it’s their duty as human beings to have a say in what everyone else does, whether or not it concerns them makes no difference.
The differences you make are not of the big picture unless you’re a person of great importance or make it to television. It seems like everyone and no one is famous. Those of you with no talent seem to be in the spotlight and everyone with so much talent that words are useless, are in basements of their houses doing what makes them great. No one sees, no one knows. It’s a tragedy but they’ll live, even if they don’t want to. We all know what that’s like. If you don’t then your life is too perfect and you need to come outside to the real world with everyone else.
Those lucky few who don’t know what it’s like to have a pain so great, so terrible that nothing in life matters and an eternity in hell look like home, and that nothing could be worse, they’re wrong. You have people in this world that are in hell and then others who whine about not being prom queen. If you’re whining about not being prom queen then you should be smacked! There are people every day that have it worse than you! You need to wake up and see the real wrongs in life! War, hunger and hate plague our, could be, world and there is little to nothing we can do. We does nothing, it’s all about what you can do. You make a difference. So stop whining and change the world one day at a time.
When you depend on someone then it’s out of your hands what happens to you. If you depend on them to deliver then it’s unreliable on whether or not it will arrive at its destination. Be independent and this insecurity will vanish and the worry will be gone forever or until you are indisposed at the current time in which you will have to accept it and take it head on. Be a strong person not weak. I don’t mean to not show fear or compassion but to be afraid and still fight. A hero fights a giant. A murder fights a child. Who are you? In your life, have you ever faced something that you were afraid and unsure you could defeat? You don’t have to be a hero but a strong person will do.
A reason to do it for love…… I have one! Do it because you love someone because someone who loves you will do the same. Do not do it expecting anything back because that’s selfish. Do it because it’s right and it will come back to you. I guess that’s what I really meant to say.
Do you know that saying too much can do you as much damage as not saying anything at all? This can be reversed but the idea is the same. “I love you.” Left unsaid can leave you alone and wanting. Many a happy endings have yet to occur because of the words left unsaid. But sometimes the words are said and the timing is wrong you’re too young, he’s too old. He’s wanting something you can’t give him: the happily ever after. He wants someone who still has a long time to go. I make be mature for my age but I’m still young and I get punished for it. Life isn’t fair and don’t forget it. You can’t change what happens and if you can then do it. Don’t hesitate, just do it. Why is a silent talent when you can change others and maybe inspire them?
Not everyone is as happy as you are and sometimes it’s not your fault, maybe you’re sad because you couldn’t get the turquoise hummer so you had to get the blue one. If that’s you put the book down and get the fuck away from me! Come back when you’ve figured what the real world is. Since you’re reading this you’re either really stubborn or you know what the real world is. Good for you, but you know that’s it’s nothing special it’s just you living your life. I live mine and I’m as happy as a person can be living in America.
It’s shocking that a guy could have so much knowledge and put it into a awesome song for the world to hear and hopefully learn from. Learn:
Artist: Sixx: a.m.
Song: Van Nuys
"Van Nuys"
I don't want to die out here in the valley
Waiting for my luck to change
And I just want my dad to know
That I finally made it...
Everybody gets high
Everybody gets low
Everybody gets bruised
Everybody gets sold
I don't want to die out here in the valley
You don't have to lie,
I know that's what I'll do
I don't want my mom to know
That I never loved my life
And I sold my soul
Everybody gets high
Everybody gets low
Everybody gets bruised
Everybody gets sold
Everybody gets dark
Everybody unfolds
Everybody gets high
Everybody gets so low
And everyone's eyes are blue
And everyone's mouth is dry
And nobody wants to die
In Van Nuys
Van Nuys
Everybody gets high
Everybody gets low
Everybody gets bruised
Everybody gets sold
Everybody gets dark
Everybody unfolds
Everybody gets high
Everybody gets so low
Well you don't know how to get back to your crawlspace
Underneath the dirt and the rust and the waste
But the sun sets fast these days.
Everyone's eyes are blue
And everyone's mouth is dry
And nobody wants to die
In Van Nuys
Van Nuys
Everyone's eyes are blue
And everyone's mouth is dry
And nobody wants to die
In Van Nuys
Van--
Everyone's eyes are blue
And everyone's mouth is dry
And nobody wants to die
In Van Nuys, oh
Everyone's eyes are blue
And everyone's mouth is dry
And nobody wants to die
In Van Nuys
Van Nuys
He knows more than you ever will. Sure this is my opinion but I have freedom of speech so I can voice it. You don’t have to listen but you’re reading this so I guess you are. So far you’ve perceived me as an angry and bitter person but I promise you I’m not that bad. I’m only as angry as any other step-child who had their parents taken away from them. I hate them. I know it’s not their fault but they always want their attention. They make me miserable to push me away and then lie to my parents about how they “think I don’t love them!” Everyone who has siblings knows what I’m going through. Don’t knock me because I’m whining, other people get shows to whine on so I get this ok.
Posted at 10:40 pm
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