The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

it's been a long, drawn out day. i swear it would never end, but now it finally has. i got to talk to my big brother half the day which was great, as he always tries to brighten my day...and i love him for that. it's great to have someone so close, who's always there for me along the way, and i don't know what i would do without my brother. he's my best friend and always will be, and i will never let him go.



then i got to talk to a really good friend, who finally asked me out as well. i can't believe it...i finally found someone who's going to make me so happy. and not only that, but he's near my mom, so i can finally see my mom and spend time with her as well. this is great. i can't believe that i'm going home soon. and a lot sooner than i thought. i'm so happy to have such great people in my life, who are there to make my days brighter, and help me work through my issues.



today may have been a long day, but in the end it was worth it. i got to talk to my two favorite people...plus my mom, and my one female friend who has been more than a friend to me as well. i am so thankful to have all 4 of you in my life. and you all know how you've helped along the way, and i am so grateful to all of you. i can't wait to see everyone when i get back home.

COMMENTS

-

---

CancerianGryffin
12:17 Sep 07 2009

See sweetie. I told you it would all work out eventually :)

---

POST COMMENT

for some odd reason i've been having my life flash before my eyes all evening. not sure why just yet...but last time this happened it was due to a major nervous breakdown...and that was bad. i'm not going to go into detail here as to what happened during it, but the last thing i need right now is for another one of those to come on. i swear i've seen everything from 3 years old up til now...and there wasn't anything good in there other than my children's births and the people i've met on here.



i don't know how much more i can take of this. it's horrible, and i hate it. the only reason i'm even still here right now is because of my kids....cause i can't leave them nor do i want to. i just hate what we're going through right now and i never wanted them to end up like i did at their age. i wanted something better for them, and i swear they will have it one way or another...but right now i have to work on getting out of here first.



i'll be so happy when all of this is said and done. that'll be the highlight of my life i'm sure...ha ha...yeah, right. anyways...i just hope that my books will start selling so that i can go ahead and get out of here asap. then be on my way to a new life near people who accept me and care about me and my kids...and possibly start a fresh fulfilling chapter of our life.

COMMENTS

-

---

CancerianGryffin
08:50 Sep 04 2009

it'll get better sis. at least we have a couple more to help us now than before :)

---

POST COMMENT

so, today's been one hell of a day...and i'm glad it's finally over...of course i have a feeling it's just the start. oh wait...that's not right, the start began when i was 3, so i guess technically it's just another chapter unfolding...and i'm ready to end the sequence.



i just wish i was around people who gave a shit and accepted me...but at least i have vr for that part of my life. this site keeps me sane for the most part, thanks to different ones i talk to on here and who are always there when you need them. i don't know where i'd be without this site.



there is one good thing that came from today though...i finally found a way to publish my work. so i created my books, and am getting ready to publish them....yay....then i just have to have fun trying to sell them and/or advertise it to sell them.



well, i guess that's it for today. life sucks for the most part as usual...i'll be so glad when i get out of here and where i belong. alright...well i think i finally refreshed myself just a lil from being drained and empty...thanks to some techniques i know. i now feel a lil better, and hopefully i don't have to do it again for a while...but we shall see. *grins evilly*

i feel so dead today. it's like i'm empty and drained, yet i don't know why. my head feels like it's ready to explode, and i can't even stay focused enough to work on my story, read my book, or even write my poetry. this isn't normal for me. i wish i knew what was causing it and a way to fix it. i can't wait til my depression meds get here though....maybe that'll help me some, or so i hope. we shall see...if not i'll have to try something else. at least i have some good friends that i can talk to when needed. thank you to all of you that are helping me through this. i really appreciate it. you are all great friends and i don't know what i would do without you.

COMMENTS

-

---

CancerianGryffin
21:46 Sep 02 2009

we'll get through it sis :)

---

birra
23:02 Sep 02 2009

"i feel so dead today. it's like i'm empty and drained..."



Uhh.. Hello? You're on a vampire site. This should be normal, right?

---

POST COMMENT

ok...so i don't really know what to write tonight in here...so i'm just going to put a few things from my day. i finally tried making a friend of mine realize what i'm really going through and dealing with right now pertaining to my past and present. i always finally decided to see if there's anyone that has the same issues as me out there pertaining to the images i see and how they become a reality. other than that, there's not much to talk about. my mind is more or less blank tonight...i can't even write my poetry. and that's not normal. i just feel drained today...and i don't know why. it's weird. alright...well, i guess that's all that im going to write for the night.

COMMENTS

-

---

Lolita
09:11 Sep 02 2009

I have had a week of not being able to write poetry which is weird for me, you mind must need a rest.

---

CancerianGryffin
11:40 Sep 02 2009

because it's because i've felt drained today as well and i might've been pulling some energy from you without knowing it.

---

POST COMMENT