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I am here to tell ya, I am sticking to my promise. NO more shots. Today is now Tuesday. Tonight I drank a six pack or so. No shots. Guess what? I feel pretty fucking good. Anyway, I got slammed at work. But, I felt good, so it was not a problem. I hope and pray that all of you don't have shitty lives like me. I know it is tough all around to live like vamps and witches and what not, but it does suck. What else can I do? Up all night, sleep all or most of the day. We need to unite-and we do it right here. Thats why I like it so much here, I don't feel alone. Suck it up people, we are alll together! And that is a good thing!

I am here. Had too much to drink tonight. Well not too much, I am still drinking. I just wanted to thank you all for looking at my journal. It does mean alot to me. It makes me feel not so much alone. Yes, I am dreading tonight(Thursday) I know shidt will hidt the fan. But I gotta buck up and take it. Pray for me......

Ahh, so refreshing. Plans for Thursday already.... Good/bad who the fuck knows. The friends want to go out, that could get sticky. Plans already mean-I should pack a lunch, it's gonna be a long night! Who knows what the fuck will happen. I just know I am in for it. Am I entertainment? Am I funny? Do I look funny to you motherfucker? How am I funny? Ok, enought with that movie shit, I just KNOW shit is gonna go down on Thursday. I can just freaking feel it. I Pray all goes well, lots of booze, friends, in a different town-can you say disaster? Things went well before, can it happen again? Guess I'm gonna find out..........

Ahh welcome to the fucking east coast. I know some of you have been dealing with this shit for some time now, but we have been spoiled up untill now. Barely made it home from work, what a disaster. I did not have much problem, but the other mental midgets were totally screwed, there were too many of them for me to even help. If you can't drive in this shit, stay home for pete's sake, you make it tougher on the rest of us. But now I am back at the shithole, not too bad tonight, hope it stays that way for three more shifts. My gut has been aching for the past two days, probably fucking food poisioning, can't think of what else it could be. Tommorrows presidents day, so I'll be racking in the cabbage just to show up for work-not too shabby. I would rather the day off though, but I will take the money.

Holy moley! I hate this fucking day! It makes me want to swallow my sidearm. Why, Why,Why does there need to be a day like this? It is horrible, a big shitty thing piled on some of us. Ok for some that are in love, it is fucking fantastic, but for others that have jack shit, it makes it ohhh so much fucking worse. I don't even want to wake up today to face this shit. I gotta go to work, that is fucking priceless. Me- in a shithole on v-day! Yeah, no doubt, god is a woman, just watching me squirm and bury my head in a bottle. Tonight is my Friday(finally) It is a Wendnesday, but fuck it, I'm getting ripped! I know if I was in love with someone next to me, I would not be writting this dribble, but I call it like I see it, for now at least. For all of you in love,stay strong-it won't last for long. For all of you like me, toast, it gotta get better than this shit!

No, it is not the theme song for that one night at the roxbury. It is a serious question. What the fuck is love? Is it a knot in your stomach? A feeling? A vision of what life could be. Maybe a sad song? Who knows. But some say when you are in it, you have no fucking clue what is going on. Yeah, gotta agree there. There are alot of questions that I have, me being the inquisitive fuck that I am. Screw it, I'm just gonna go with the flow, I like where I'm at, and thats where I'm going! Fucking rock on!

Damn. Vacation is over. Had to go back tonight. Crappy to say the least. But I muddled through it. Only six more to go for two days off. At least they are better now having off Thursdays and Fridays. Have not been sleeping well, don't really know why. This cold is fucking killing me, I just can't stay warm. Gotta start dressing better for work, this chilling ain't working for me. I guess I gotta just think of some "hot" thangs to keep me going!

Ok, I lost the whole freaking thing tonight. No money for the bunkster. Nothing,zippo,zilch,nada. Alot of money gone. I should feel depressed, but I am not. Not too bad of a night. Could have been alot worse. But tommorrow will be a better day. I hope.

Not doing TOO bad, got really ripped last night though. Tonight, not so much. Got to much to do tommorrow, the big game and all. With any luck, money comes my way. Please please let the bear win big! Or i'll be working O.T. I just gotta remember to eat today, or I'll be in big trouble!

I am so happy right now. I can't describe it, just talking to someone. Maybe I am dreaming, still, I feel "different" If I was with someone like this, I would be so happy. But my inner self tells me this would never happen. Fuck it for now I am happy. I hope it never goes away!

Holy crap! It already a month into it. Ahh, the smell of love,sex, and whatever else there is....The ever infamous st.valentines day. What the fuck is this all about? I love you so much I gotta send you flowers,stuffed animals, take you to dinner, and with any luck-hot fucking sex. For all that is evil, it is like acceptable prostitution! I give it up, then you give it up. I would rather got to a "health spa" and dump my money. At least I know how it will turn out for sure. Well with my luck the place would get raided, go figure.