The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

A not so friendly, alien race, spots earth and decides to take over. A scout ship lands, and two aliens step out. They are short. Big heads. Your stereo typical aliens. They land in a corn field.One of the aliens steps up to a stalk of corn, pulls its laser weapon, and in a wimpy, little voice says, "Take me to your leader." Of course, the corn doesn't respond, so he ask again, and a again gets no response, shoots it. He steps to the next stalk, and the whole ugly scene repeats itself. The other alien suggests that this is not a earth being. That they must move on. Next they spot a mailbox. The same alien approaches the box and says, "take me to your leader." and of course the box didn't respond. The alien asks again and boom! Flaming mail dropping all around them, and they realized this was not a earthing. The two aliens walked across the street to a gas station. The same alien walked up to a gas pump, and said, Take me to your leader." The other alien starts trying to get the asking party to wait before he shoots. Just as he says "Hey don't shoot that..." the alien shot the gas pump. There was a HUGE explosion, and eventually the two aliens land back on the ground. The alien with the laser says, "hey, how did you know i Shouldn't have shot that creature?" The first alien says, "when i saw this guys dick was so long, that it wrapped around his body, and had he stuck in his ear, I knew he was nothing to mess with."