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I crave life.

Thirst for all of its pleasures.

My desires have been kept from me.

Not by my design, but by others.

I can hear the flow of life.

Its rhythmic beat echoes in my ears.

The scent travels through the protective barrier of the skin, into my nostrils where it furthers my need. My mouth waters and taste buds impatiently await, await the red river of life. It is to be pumped into my mouth by the struggling, fading heart.

My need vastly heightened by the exigency for life… and by its closeness. For it is concealed within this person lying upon her canopied bed. The pink net curtains which are drawn back from her bed brush against my face as I move past them to position myself over her. Silently I move to her, the scent of her blood compels me. Beckoning me to continue on to her.

Her stuffed animals watch me as I lean over her. Ever so steadily and forcefully I am pulled towards her. Starvation seeking relief. Looking upon her pink and youthful face; I know that soon it will no longer live. Her features will wither as she dies for me. Her skin will gray and she will wrinkle as her blood leaves her. She dies to give me life. But why? Greed?

But no more than that which drives men to kill defenseless animals by the millions. Their bodies are cut into pieces and frozen in order to be distributed. How much of them are cooked, then thrown away instead of eaten? It is such a waste of life. Should she be awake she could cry out for help, where the animal has nothing to cry to. What is this that I do to myself!?

I’m maddening myself in trying to find a reason in bringing peace to her. Perhaps I’m putting myself through this horrible anguish because this is my first time drinking blood… apart from my masters. Since my master’s blood is the only that I have known and only once. Although, I cannot remember the flavor of his blood. I only remember his bite and then falling asleep.

When I woke warm flesh was pressed to my lips and I bit down. I drank until I was aware of myself. Or perhaps it was just a dream. A dream of new desires brought on by my change. My subconscious mind becoming aware of the change before I could wake to my normal senses. In that darkness I woke this evening to a life renewed. I came here to her house to quench my thirst for blood, but why her? What was it that pulled me here to her? Revenge? Maybe I still have feelings for her, but how? Why?

After the misery she had put me through, misery which she caused after I had confessed my feelings to her. And she spread this around school. She had told her friends what I had said to her. Her friends ridiculed me mercilessly behind my back when all I tried to do was to have her as my girl friend. The other students in class would point their finger at me in class while laughing. How could I possibly be with the head cheerleader?

Of course everyone wanted her, and of course she had a boyfriend already. He did not really care for her as I did. As I do! Everyone laughing and pointing at me! Can anyone understand the rage brought on by all of this!?

Tears flow down my cheek and land on her bed next to her, which is where I want my head to be. I do not wish to embrace her corpse. I want to hold her and for her to hold me. Our bodies sharing heat from our embrace. My tears on her sheets mix with the drips of bloody drool which have already fallen from my mouth onto her sheets.

I was laughed at pitilessly by all who knew what had happened, and it seemed that everyone did. Word spread around school in a day. It took me more than two years to ask her out and only a day for word of my humiliation to spread. This caused me to regret trying to follow my heart. I took a chance, a long shot. I had to. I had wanted to do it for years. At least she was alone.

After her third period class she walked out alone each day. Mine was only two doors down. It made me feel like a stalker watching her as I did, following her as I tried to find the confidence in me to speak to her. One day I had finally tried. I moved quickly towards her at first, and then my nerves began to fail me as my eyes caught sight of her. The lack of nerve kept me from speaking to her when she had broken up with her old boyfriends in the past. Soon this school year would end. My chance this year will end with it, and I had to finally ask.

My nerves shook my legs as I approached her. They rattled my voice as I spoke to her. But I had to talk to her though. I thought I could trust her. I just needed to ask her, to know if she would even consider me. It should not have been so hard to talk to her, after all I already knew her. We grew up together, laughed together as children. We were the only two kids on the block. Now in high school she betrayed me like that!

She moved away before middle school to another part of town. We were two friends who were torn apart by a parents' new job. When we parted she said that she hoped that we would see each other again. We were friends before she became popular. Years later we were friends no longer, when I was not popular as well.

As time passed we grew up apart. Keeping in touch did not last long so we became different people. We went to different middle schools. I went to the one not far from where we grew up. On a good sunny day school was within walking distance if I left early enough. It was not as nice as the one that she attended. She went to the one across town, the expensive part of town. Because there is only one high school where we live, I knew that I would see her again. Now that we attend the same high school, I did see her. After about the second week of school I saw her again for the first time. She got out of the car in front of the school.

Without hesitation I approached her. It was not a happy reunion of two friends. She had changed. She was different. Instead of a warm greeting between friends after so many years, she did not speak to me.

That day when we happened to pass by each other for the first time at the beginning of our freshman year, I was so happy to see her. I had waved and went to her. Instead of being happy to see me, she asked me to go away. It only took her one look at me to know that I do not fit in with her anymore. Just one look and I saw that dismissive look that I always got from girls in middle school.

Two more years had passed before I had the nerve to approach her again. I would see her in a class or two each semester. She ignored me. Her friends ignored me. I did not know it then, but them ignoring me was better.

Perhaps if I were smarter I would have left well enough alone and accepted what had happened. But should I not go to an old friend? The first time that I went to speak to her was to talk to a long lost friend, this time it was to find a lover. I shouldn’t have tried to confess my feelings to her.



This ebook is available at www.eloquentbooks.com/OhLifeLovelyLife.HTML

Also now in print at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, etc.

COMMENTS

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mistyyaslana
00:51 Nov 18 2009

Alsome man :)

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