The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

About we, who choose to dress in a way we find acceptable to ourselves. We who you would call sheep for not conforming to your "dark, or industrial" styles.



No I won't wear an ugly fucking mask to hide my not so bad looking face. I prefer to not smell like a record press mixed amongst many who don't even seem to know what the differences between anti-persperants and deoderants are.



I refuse to lust after women who wear grotesque amounts of makeup hiding a naturally beautiful face. I refuse to be so anti everything just because one thing that someone made public puts a soiled stain on it.



I am my own mind, I make my choices based in my own best interest, or that of my friends and family. So all of you who deem me lesser for going with the flow of things from the norm, from the alternate, from the anti and anarchy, just know this. I am better than you, because I see all that I can, and take what I can from everything that can be put to good use. I will introduce myself to the out of place so that I will no longer fear it.



I was a jock, I was a geek, a band nerd, a drama student, a knowledge bowl participant. Above all else, I still am a student of life. I refuse to close my mind off to things merely because it would be more comfortable that way. And you who would think that just because you are some way that everyone is out to get you need to put down the bottle, the roach clip, and the needle and don't forget turn off that web cam whos self portrayed naked self you have sent to who knows how many women and men making you the whore you hated in high school.



When you put others down for their lack of L33t $p34k or their non interest in the cyber world you claim to dominate with your superior yet unnecessary knowledge of html coding in how to have raining crosses, hearts, faces of violent j or whatever little thing gets you so wet you could make a slip and slide on your floor after a few mop ups. There are those of us here who come here to relax, maybe bullshit, and have some good ole fashioned conversations with people we like.



We don't think we are better than you, we just know that we have more expierence with the world and how to stand on our own, how much we really need our friends and how much we really don't need to get angry cause it only adds stress to our minds.



Random Pinja Moment 375 mm I could use a good 375.

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ToiletDuc
15:45 Feb 27 2008

u just dontt unnerstand me and oll teh payne i half tu deel wiff. *cut* *cut* *cut* *checks to make sure someone's watching to give proper attention* *cut* *cut* *cut*

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I guess I just am one gullible bastard. I suppose I lost my use as a good friend. I now never know what the hell is going on unless I login here and check journal entries.



I've always been a phone call away, but I suppose working mid shifts can put a damper on my availability. God knows you're going through more shit than I could deal with at once, but i'm flailing now and I can't even send a message without a days wait in reply.



Then I think I have to remember i'm just not that close of a friend in the end. I'm not able to catch you ever, or recieve calls from you, or even see you on messenger anymore. I guess I will just wait, if things get better for you which you need maybe you will find time to talk to me again, if I haven't already been replaced.

Well I just ate something, but it wasn't much. About 100 calories. But other than that, I don't think i've eaten more than 600 calories a day for the last 5 days other than my day off, and the food I ate then had about as much sustanence as a bag o chips. I'm tired, and don't want to eat no matter how fucking hungry I am. I don't know whats going on with me anymore. fuck...



I just don't care, I just want nothing.

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Drakontion
09:00 Feb 15 2008

*hugs* =(

feel better hun

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I look to see who of my favorites are online after a short hiat.....however you spell that word that you may know i'm trying to spell and failing at. but after a short sabbatical from the rave because of a downed computer I came on to see whos here and whats up.



The first profile avatar that truly grabs my attention, a girl claiming to be 18/ 19 sometime this month that has a picture of her enormous boobs in her bra while she raises her shirt.



Now i'm a perv no doubt about it but goddamned if I don't want to be a playful perv and look for someone to pass the time and flirt with mutually, not just look around and BAM boobs in face/screen.



Now i'm not going to be a complete chauvanist but damn, sexual empowerment means not allowing yourself to be just be a sexual object and have confidence in yourself and your body and your own beauty. I'm not saying every woman is pretty in the world, in fact, there are a few fugly women, as well as men in this world.



But when does it all revert back to thinking that its okay to show off your breasts and ass, and show the world what you look like in your panties and bra/ bathing suit in 20 degree weather what do you expect but a bunch of sexually deviant bastard coated bastards with bastard filling (scrubs quote) to do but hit you up 80+ times a day wanting to cyber/meet up, or just fucking jerk it to your picture that they saved to their computer while you message them to leave you alone and stop being a perv.



Now, we are beings of conscious choice. But normally the smaller head will rule the decisions in that matter when it comes to the male persuasion, I know. Some guys, will be pervs their whole life and never get the message but that is because for some reason in this world its been made clear that its okay to be a dominating asshole who has no tact, manners, and respect for the woman he is about to message with his sick mispelled attempts to get a picture of your pooter.



I don't blame porn, I don't blame the president, I don't blame men, or women. I blame us, humanity whats left of it.



For allowing ourselves to remain so far behind social evolution that we are infact regressing to days where large parties are trying to "put women back in their place." When I say this I mean the following.



Animal rights activists, I love animals, but unless it is endangered, a keystone species, or soon to be endangered let it be. Right now lets not raise hundreds of millions of dollars to give the dogs and cats, and fucking guinea pigs a home. Lets educate our uneducated children on manners, politeness, tact, LIFE education.



Instead of trying to do good for other countries lets just make ours better. The problem with our foreign policy is other countries can just tune into our news and see how fucked up we are, can we do the same with them? Are they constantly wasting money and time making their census, crime polls, and everything else easily accessible to the world population? Not really, you can find them but not as easily as you can find ours.



If we spent just a little bit of the time and effort we spend worrying about movie stars, musical artists, hack former celeberties brought back into the limelight with reality television we could really make things better. I'm tired really I am, but I will be goddamned crucified first if I'm not going to try to make things better for the future of our nieces, nephews, cousins, children, and friends. Its not just us that are here, it is the future that will be.



Ever hear the phrase "leave things better than when you recieved them."



I love originality I truly do. I love thought, even if it is stupid and racist, because it means someone is thinking. I may not agree with their view but they are using a part of their brain we are now medicating our children into a deadened state. What will it take? To get the world to see, scratch that, Fuck the world. Just to get our neighbors, our family, ourselves to see that it just takes a bit more effort and a little less complaining.



Educate younger about sex, its reprocussions, its responsibillities. Educate sooner about the difference between love and lust, even though that seems much more appropriately a life lesson better they learn through words than in the back of a 22 year olds suv when your kid isn't even a sophmore yet. Take the time, because time is so fleeting.



We don't have to love each other, but we should all be able to learn from each other. Once in this country we were created equal, and rose to a haughty attitude of benevolence and that arrogance has made us a laughing stock to the world.



An Idea of freedom, moved to a proclomation of manifest destiny, then to seperate but equal, then to all equal but only if you had the money, and now to the self serving hedonism only a roman senator during a serving boy orgy could enjoy.



These words will be skimmed, and shrugged off. worse the ones who argue the futility of my points and hopes. But that doesn't matter, because I don't lose hope I have more than myself to live for, and only those who understand that and know it themselves would be so willing to spread the same hope.



I digressed so much from the original but it became something better I find so I'm not bothered by this.



Please read these and take meaning.



Put forth the effort where it is needed, where those who need it, also want it. Its not just your child out there, its someone elses child who needs guidance and help too, so they don't become a green river killer, a unibomber, a rapist, a murderer, a thug, a thief, a child abuser. The sum of what americans can be known for. Lets change that it just takes a little truly.



Hope you took something from this, because a few self realizations happened for me. Goodnight you crazy ass insomniacs.