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Originally posted on the Vampirism group at Yahoo.



Twilight Within



Unlocking Our True-Nature



By Madame X



Posted with the expressed permission of the writer



House of the Dreaming dares us to discover ourselves and explore our

true-nature, that inner part of us that is beyond personality, thought,

spirit; that eternal, unchanging core of essence inside all of us,

dreaming ancient dreams.



Over time we have learned the art of deceiving everyone around us, even

those that mean the most to us. We seem to be accepted and loved for

those parts of us that we have chosen to share; yet we fear how they

would feel if they really knew us, what would happen if we stripped away

our dayside-personality . Certainly our explorations need not involve

anyone else, they are personal private investigations.



It may not be easy to acknowledge that we are very different than how we

present ourselves; similarly, neither are we the person that our parents

and society have insisted on. Within every one of us there are dueling

oppositions light vs. dark impulses, instinct vs. conscience, desire vs.

duty, and what is reason vs. what is imagination. We can deny those

unacceptable sides of our nature but risk being at the mercy of their

powerful primitive demands. Our inner nature is not exclusively made up

of savage predatory impulses, but of all those aspects that our

dayside-personality cannot accept; it may be awkwardness, insecurity,

submissiveness and tenderness. For what to one may be strength to

another is weakness. Knowing this, we can see the need to understand and

accept our true nature finding ways of dealing with the conflicting

contradictions of our dual or even multiple selves. House of the

Dreaming appreciates this innate struggle, but before we continue on our

quest, we must commit our character to the Veil of the Waking Dream; for

as we delve further into our inner selves we will be faced with serious

internal conflict where such bastions of the Veil, like loyalty,

fortitude, resolve and compassion, must become our only guides.



A good deal of psychic energy is utilized to sustain our

dayside-personality ; the more divided we are within ourselves, the more

energy is necessary to keep away the threat of loosing that façade.

Achieving Twilight Within is to mesh the conscious dayside personality

with our denied innate instincts. Once we achieve inner twilight we no

longer need to misappropriate our precious energy. Discovering,

acknowledging and accepting our true-nature will not only enhance our

self-awareness, increase our inner-balance, becoming more self-assured;

but we will also become more respectful and less critical of others as

we realize our own personal meaning. Undivided, we will be better

prepared to face the challenges of the world around us, while reaching

for higher goals. Achieving twilight within, as both a child of

darkness and light can be the most empowering triumph of our lifetime.



To do this we need some essential tools as ours is not an easy quest.

First, we must develop suspendability, putting aside our pre-conceptions

of who we are, who we are supposed to be, and what is reasonable sanity;

being aware of our first instinctual thought and initial inclination in

any given situation.



( the rest of this article can be found at



http://www.thegrave yardpress. com/enlightenmen t/twilight_ within.htm

You know you're a vampire in the Midwest when...



-you refuse to watch "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" not because of the occult themes, but because of all the mistakes



-you had your first exorcism before you could drive



-you're convinced your city puts the "fun" in "fundamentalist Christian extremism" (i.e., Anderson, IN)



-you laughed your ass off at the "Vampire: the Masquerade" description of your city (double points if it's Indianapolis! )



-you salivate and nauseate at mention of "the blood of JEE-ZUZ!"



-you've ever corrected something in "Charmed" or "The Craft"



-you've ever been wrongfully accused of being a Satanist ... and not been insulted



-you've ever muttered "I wish I really could turn into a bat; gas is WAY too expensive!"



-even emos think you're weird



-you think the drink "Bloody Mary" is false advertising



-you've gotten ideas for pranks from a Chick Tract



-they know your name at the Polish butcher shop



-you can't understand why anyone would want a steak cooked past medium-rare (sorry, that's how you know you're from the Midwest, period)



-you have more stringent blood standards than the Red Cross



-you've ever driven more than an hour to hang out in Indianapolis' s Crown Hill Cemetery



-you've reprimanded a self-injurer not for their conduct, but for wasting blood



-you've ever scared the staff in a psych ward



-you don't think this list is a joke