16:03 Jun 27 2008
Times Read: 681
I'm on the phone this morning ordering breakfast tacos for some of us at work.
"yes, I'd like a bean and egg taco, a sausage, egg and cheese taco and OH, do you have good cabeza? If it's not ready right now, how long will it take to get it ready for me? *the man laughs* You do have cabeza? I'd like a taco of that but make it really big. The last time I got cabeza from you it was too small. Just make sure you make it big.
I turn around and the girls at work are laughing and the guy on the phone is "heh, heh, hehing".
I realized my mistake too late, of course.
I'm just glad I didn't go pick up the order.
20:24 Jun 25 2008
Times Read: 710
Doc has me on the right track now. I think it will take a while for me to get where I need to be, but I'm willing to wait.
I just have to remember to take the medicine. I am the worlds worst about taking meds.
It was nothing life threatening, just painful. I took a shot to my left buttocks (ouch) for the pain and Hello there, that thing burned enough to make me forget the pain for a few minutes! I've been put on some meds and I should be back to myself in a couple of months.
In the meantime, my mortality is showing and I just needed to get a grip on the fact that I'm getting older.
Life's a bitch, who says I can't give her some competition once in a while?
Thank you to those that were concerned. I appreciate it and you more than you know.
An Old Man, A Boy And A Donkey...
20:01 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 774
An old man, a boy and a donkey, were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey and the old man walked.
As they went along they passed some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking and the boy was riding.
The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions.
Then, later, they passed some people who remarked, 'What a shame, he makes that little boy walk.'
So they then decided they'd both walk!
Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a decent donkey to ride.
So, they both rode the donkey.
Now they passed some people who shamed them by saying how awful to put such a load on a poor donkey.
The boy and man figured they were probably right, so they decide to carry the donkey.
As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal and he fell into the river and drowned.
The moral of the story?
If you try to please everyone, you might as well...
..Kiss your ass goodbye!
*AMEN*
Pass this on to all the Hubbys
19:55 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 780
Menopause Jewelry
My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods.
We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green.
When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big frickin red mark on his forehead.
Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond. Dumb ass!
15:31 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 803
I know you'll read this...because I know you read what I post in here. You are relentless woman!
That being said, you are something else. I know we've never been the closest of friends, but we've stayed in contact for quite a while. You've become someone that I value and respect.
Lately, I've come to look forward to seeing your zany, dizzy tights and rushing over to see what wacky comment you've left on my journal.
You never cease to amaze me. No matter what's going on in your life, you have always been someone who makes me smile. I've admired your courage to get out of a bad situation and make things better for yourself and your family. Throughout it all, you've managed to still stay spunky and funny and yeah, even kind and good (I know, no one will EVER believe me!).
Yuse is good people Meggers...and I'm glad to know ya :)
I
Too Cute NOT to post14:59 Jun 18 2008
Times Read: 812
An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard; I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of.
He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head; he then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep.
An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.
The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour. This continued off and on for several weeks.
Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'
The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar: 'He lives in a home with 6 children, 2 under the age of 3 - he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?'
21:48 Jun 16 2008
Times Read: 844
Ack! What a weekend! I hurt in places I didn't know existed!
We went dancing Saturday night. I think the hubs and I both missed dancing just a little too much. I think we danced almost every song that we recognized..and some we didn't!
I had new shoes on too....dammit I knew better!! By the end of the evening, the pad of my toes was so sore, I was sure I'd have bruising!
I woke up the next morning with my tippy toes sore, my calves felt like they were on fire and even my ASS hurt...now that's a new one on me. The hubs said I didn't fall down or anything, we just did an ungodly number of twists and turns when dancing.
Of course, our house seems to be the magnet for after dancing party central. We had a whole group of our close friends here..and we continued the dancing and ...*woe of all woes*..the singing too. Apparantly too much alcohol makes me think I can sing AND dance like JLo or something.
I'm just glad no one had a video or camera this time. We slid into bed at 5am. Well, I'm actually told that I kinda fell asleep on the couch and so hubs had to bring me to the bed.
I woke up at 7am in panties and bra and a ringing in my ears.
Turns out the ringing was the telephone. My mother insisted I drive over to my sisters house and have her call mom. "umm....right now mom?" You guessed it, right now.
I returned home, errand complete and tried to stay awake. I made breakfast for the bunch, but couldn't eat any of it. I vacuumed the living room and cleaned the kitchen.
That was it...I couldn't stand to keep my eyes open any longer and I didn't even want to find my bed. I pulled a pillow off the couch, tossed it onto the newly vacuumed floor and pulled a throw over me.
I woke up at 5pm, hungry as hell but feeling much much better. Hubs had let me sleep and instructed all the kids to leave me be. He said if I'd slept one hour longer, he would have tossed a bucket of water on me. He was hungry and I was thankful...so I made dinner.
When will I learn?
16:40 Jun 11 2008
Times Read: 917
My son started working several late hours with his new job. He's used to working at the YMCA. he's a lifeguard and there's not much call for a lifeguard at night.
So when the new job started scheduling him until 10/11pm..all he saw was the paycheck.
He came home the other day and asked what was for dinner. I told him I didn't cook, we'd decided on eating out since it was just hubby and I.
Last night he comes home from work and asks what's for dinner. I told him hubby felt like soup, so I made soup. He went on a long tirade about how he works hard every night now and he would like to have a hot meal to come home to.
Of course, AFTER I picked my jaw up off the floor, I told him if he wanted a hot meal everyday, he'd better be driving to a restaurant and ordering it.
Jeesh....I've raised a spoiled brat! :P
20:32 Jun 10 2008
Times Read: 932
How do you go from cooking for 7 to cooking for 3?
For the last week, the kids have been doing their own thing now. They are away with friends, or working or visiting their dad. I'm at home cooking a monster meal and there's no one here to eat it all.
I've refrigerated and frozen and doled out to neighbors until they are practically putting in requests for the next meal.
I don't measure my seasonings, I just throw them in, so the flavor is lacking a bit when I try cooking smaller amounts. I haven't figured out how to cut down on the seasonings yet.
I hate cooking by recipes, but unless I want to keep wasting food, I guess I'd better learn to like them pretty quick.
20:42 Jun 09 2008
Times Read: 936
Great truths that children have learned:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a dust-buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
Great truths that adults have learned:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
Great truths about growing old:
1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair
that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1 -- You believe in Santa Claus.
2 -- You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3 -- You are Santa Claus.
4 -- You look like Santa Claus.
SUCCESS:
At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . having money.
At age 70 success is . .. . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.
Two Minute Management Course20:38 Jun 09 2008
Times Read: 938
Lesson One
An eagle was sitting on a tree — resting…doing nothing. A small
rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do
nothing”? The eagle answered, “Sure, why not”? So, the rabbit sat on
the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared,
jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree; but, I haven’t got the energy”, sighed the
turkey. “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?”, replied
the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients”. The turkey pecked at a lump
of dung and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the
lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung,
he reached the second branch. Finally, on the fifth day, he found
himself proudly perched at the top. There, he was promptly spotted by a
farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson: Bull shit might get you to the top; but, it won’t keep you there.
Lesson Three
A little bird was flying South for the winter. It was so cold, the
bird’s wings froze and he fell to the ground in a large field. While
he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the
frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how
warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! The bird lay there
all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard
the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat
discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lessons:
1.) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
2.) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3.) And, when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!!!
This concludes your two-minute management course.
18:54 Jun 09 2008
Times Read: 951
Sometimes you have to just nut up and make a decision. Making a decision and knowing it won't be the popular decision...now that takes some balls....doesn't it?
I'd like to think that I'm the stronger person here. I'm definately the more experienced one. Though, in this, I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not.
After all is said and done, I've got several people who are affected by this decision.
You know, I could handle one being pissed off at me for the rest of his life. He's worthless and I could care less about his opinion. There is another involved and the opinion of this person is very very important to me. I think that in some ways, I may have already lost some of this person, and that kills a bit of me everyday.
But the person whose opinion matters most to me, is my own. I think I'll struggle with myself for years to come over this one decision. I've beat myself up and tried to rationalize it all away. It won't go away and I don't think I'll settle these feelings until I can see that the decision made wasn't for naught.
Even then...there will always be the "what ifs"....it never ends.
17:20 Jun 07 2008
Times Read: 971
Sometimes I enjoy the alone time I get. Last night wasn't enjoyable alone time.
My husband and youngest went to go see his mother. My son stayed with his best friend an my other daughter was with her dad.
I relaxed, had a quick fix for supper and played poker. At 11pm I started thinking about bedtime, but the turtles kept making so much racket I decided a few more games of poker would be fun. I'd lost 120K (What? It's play money!) by 1am and still couldn't bring myself to go to bed alone.
I made sure all the windows and doors were locked, then hit the tables one last time. At 3:45 I couldn't stand it anymore. I just kept getting this creepy feeling. I don't know...it was just strange.
I did what I said I'd never do. I brought Daisy, our rottweiler, inside the house. I opened my bedroom door and she jumped right onto the bed, on MY side! lol. She wouldn't budge. I had to scoot her over and she rolled like a sleeping baby..lol
She passed right out, and with her close..so did I.
I woke up this morning at 9am when she jumped off the bed. I scooted her outside, though she clearly didn't want to go.
They'll all be gone again tonight...I think I'll bring Daisy back in tonight too.
AAADD - KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....
17:35 Jun 04 2008
Times Read: 1,050
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better,even though I have it!!
Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
and notice that the can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back
on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think,
since I'm going to be near the mailbox
when I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.
I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk where
I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.
I'm going to look for my checks,
but first I need to push the Coke aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
The Coke is getting warm,
and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke,
a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye--they need water.
I put the Coke on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter,
fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
but first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers,
but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back on the table,
get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then, I head down the hall trying to
remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day,
and I'm really tired.
I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail....
Do me a favor.
Forward this message to everyone you know,
because I don't remember who I've sent it to.
Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming.
05:53 Jun 01 2008
Times Read: 731
I've felt like typing something up for my journal for a few days now. Something spectacular, something substantial, something...I don't know, hell, I don't know what I wanted to write. I just know I've wanted to write.
I've put a few little bits and pieces in, but nothing feels right so far. I just can't figure out what it is I want to write.
This is getting a little frustrating. I hope I can break through this block soon.
You know, the more I think about it...maybe I can't write it out because I shouldn't.
Who knows, if and when it's time, I guess I'll figure it out.
COMMENTS
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Sinora
19:46 Jun 27 2008
That one did'nt quite make past the divide...no idea what cabeza is....lol
Angelus
00:59 Jun 29 2008
..poor Sinora, it did make sense.
I laughed.
SeleneTremere
15:50 Jun 30 2008
A taco of head basically...lol
Kontradiction
18:58 Jun 30 2008
HAW HAW...
oh my!
xxEmaeraldxx
21:47 Jul 01 2008
Hey, it could of been your lucky day if you did go pick up the order!
SeleneTremere
15:07 Jul 02 2008
No no honey...it might have been HIS lucky day ;)