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This illness, this curse, has stolen from me. It set my sights on a father other than whom I was born to, and now that father is dying. For all my skills, I cannot prevent this. It cost me a relationship of 8 years, one which this same father smiled upon and rejoiced over ..it too, found the dust through my deceit and wickedness. All this, for a calling, a curse upon my heart and mind that I've declared a blessing in better days, but not on this one.



The only man I ever respected, who gave up everything so that his children could live better than he, withers away in a bed ..with a son like me. A son that could never give him the grandchildren he so wished to see before passing, a son that could never be bothered with togetherness because he cared more about the next life than this one, and lastly, a son so diseased of the mind that until just recently couldn't come and visit him, a wounded and wonderful man, more than once or so a year for the past 6 years. These years, that I now to be among his last.



I cannot begin to describe the regret I feel now, the pain ..and even though I haven't been there, he has always been there, and I don't know what I'll do when he passes. He deserved a better son than I. I am so sorry, father. Now I understand what you meant when I left all those years ago, that if I did not keep in touch, I would come to regret it. You knew. And now, so do I.



At last, we share something profound, even if it is the last thing we'll come to know together. I'll never be able to equal your greatness as a human being, and the fact that I know that you were beyond condemning me for anything I ever did, no matter how horrible ..your unconditional love.. makes your potential loss all the more devastating. I am a fool, and I can take nothing back.

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GalFriday
15:14 Jul 31 2009

I have no words, Love. But a great abundance of hugs just waiting for you when i get off work tomorrow. I know nothing will bring you consolation but hopefully I can help you find a scant shred of relief. You know you have my heart. Always.

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So, in typical fashion, I was making fun of a Canadian again. You know, Canada, where all the Uglies live, next only to the inbred UK, and maybe the swamplands of Louisiana. This is an excerpt of the conversation:





MrD: You know, call me petty, but I really don't think I could live in a country that is represented by a Maple leaf. They'd have the stick a Rainbow behind it to make the flag any more flaming or impotent.



Canadian: What makes the United States so much better ..you guys are always hailing your Bald Eagle. I mean, seriously, what kind of eagle has not feathers on it's head?



MrD: WTF?!?!?! Are you kidding me?!?

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immortalxkiss
16:49 Jul 30 2009

That right there, that just made my whole day. Wow.

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Morrigon
17:36 Jul 30 2009

Ohhh classic....

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xoXPinkyXox
00:56 Jul 31 2009

o.O What were you talking to a Newf?

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madamefate
05:09 Aug 02 2009

can we say dumbass? lol

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This is the third time a just a few days this has happened to me. I'll respond to a message, only to find out later that the person I've been waiting for a letter back from did indeed send it ..but that I had somehow blocked them. I responded to a letter just a few moments ago ..and not only after looking did I find that he was blocked, but that another user I had sent a letter to was also blocked! I have no idea how it happened in either case ..is anyone else having this issue?

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GalFriday
15:16 Jul 31 2009

I think it's your computer. It does that to me at least once every day I use it. That damnable community wireless is a killer.

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madamefate
05:10 Aug 02 2009

My agents tell me it's the keyboard and mouse spies. They are working together with the gnomes.....it's all a conspiracy.

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Arunima
01:40 Aug 07 2009

Yep, I was blocked.

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It never ceases to amaze me how many people I run into on here that equate the entirety of themselves with their sexuality, I mean, what better way is there to tell the world that your sole purpose in life is to score a piece of ass?



I run into this more with strict homosexuals than anyone else. Usually, beyond Rave, I find this more with with males, but it seems lesbians - or at least one - is trying to corner the market here. How curious. Oh well, compensation I suppose, what else is there to say?

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imagesinwords
19:26 Jul 29 2009

I am so with you on this. I have a lot of gay friends, and they are defined by way more than their sexuality... that's why they are my friends. I wouldn't want to be known only for my sexuality. It's starts to get boring after a while. As a matter of fact, it's intellect that usually gets a fellow intellectual 'randy' anyway ;) So, they'll attract their kind I suppose.

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Hmm ..I'll be slapping up some new threads and a page or two in the Coven today. I wonder what else I can do.



So apparently, I've pissed on someone's wheaties again. I inducted a favor slave today whom I then randomly decided to put on the auction block. I was then accused of being a racist because I used the word slave in a sentence to refer to the users profile, who is, quite clearly of African descent. I knew one of these knee-jerk PC liberals would say something about it as I was posting it, and when I got the first message, I'll admit it, I laughed for a good two minutes or so ..and am in still in the after-glow of my own delicious evil.



But, that said, I hate to disappoint you all, but racism had nothing to do with it. I saw him, he happened not to be inducted, so I kidnapped him ..and now I am selling him. This is my right, he is now my property, if you have a problem with that then you can expend the 100 favor to purchase him. Trust me, my slaves come in all shapes and sizes, and yes, even colors. So call me a Nazi as often as you want ..the negative attention just tickles me to death.

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xoXPinkyXox
19:43 Jul 29 2009

I had a good giggle over seeing that classified. Really I did. And honestly, I wouldn't even waste 100 favor on said slave., because little known fact about me, I am racist.=)

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I do wish people wouldn't be so damn cowardly. This is the internet, no one is forcing you to hang with me, and if you have something to communicate ..you might try delivering that information to me instead of passing indicators elsewhere.



I'll not be involved in the dramatic anymore, I'll just become dispassionately cruel.

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sahahria
15:34 Jul 28 2009

Amen.

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There are times, when rating people, that they just have a dog-shit profile and need to be rated a one. The fact is, I encourage anyone reading this to be as brutal as possible, while being true to their impression, when rating any users profile ..and yeah, that includes mine. People toss out tens all across the board here out of fear they might get something lower, thus rendering the rating system entirely all but completely useless as an effective guide to quality profiles or portfolios. The best example is these undereducated, goat blowing, pedophiliac drama queens that believe that anything below a rating of 8 is a massive injustice. And god forbid you gave them a 5 or *gasp* a 6, or you'll get about the same reaction you would have if you had raped their mothers and hung their bastard children!



Now I'll grant you, not all reactions are that extreme, but I've gotten some like it, and it's never pretty. Some of them are just rude, and act as though they are entitled to some special rate status. You know, the ones, I'm sure. Hiding behind avatars of the latest pop-icon to conceal their true, disgustingly obese natures as they lay floppily behind their outdated Dell monitors munching on Taco Bell in their sweat-stained, pink Moo-Moo's. It's even worse when you tried to be nice about the whole thing, but alas, their prideful special-Ed status gets the best of them. I'll give you a less extreme example, but a good one nonetheless. This is a series of curt notes I got regarding one of my rates.





On 00:56:32 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) DarkRaven wrote:



Why did you rate me a 5? Personally I think my profile is fine.







On 01:45:49 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) MrD wrote:



Considering I've been rating most people much lower today, you're in the Upper-class it would seem. Having said that, two factors contributed most of all to this 'mid-road' rating. It was felt that the text was too dark to be a pleasant read and that your profile is too cluttered with unnecessary graphics. If this changes in the future, do let me know, and I'll be more than happy to re-rate you.



- D





On 04:26:44 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) DarkRaven wrote:



considering that others rate 10's I really do not care what you say I like my profile and anyway if you don't like it do not come to my profile.





On 04:37:04 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) MrD wrote:



Cancer, the Prince, has said more than once that ratings of ten are handed out like candy here. If I were you, I would not take a ten rating to always be a true reflection of what others really see ..as most on here open multiple windows, rate and stamp, all for the goal of increase their bonuses. Many users rate a default ten because they want you to do the same for them. That is not in line with my goals, as I like to use the ratings system honestly and not to pad the egos of individual site users. You were courteous enough to stop by, and rather politely, I might add, ask me the simple question of why I gave you the rate I did. I then offered to re-rate pending any changes, if that is not something you want, than you will just have to accept the rating I give you. My offer still stands, despite your defensive reply.





On 07:32:11Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) DarkRaven wrote:



I really do not care, but I can tell you now, stay the hell away from my profile.





I then tried to write her back to clear up the matter only to find that this little brat had already blocked me ..for a rating of 5! What a clown, I thought, soooo ..I went to her profile and rated her a much deserved 1 for being pretentious and excessively rude. I then got another message stating that I was, "just out for revenge".



How astute of you! You actually do understand cause and effect. Then the following should be clear. Not everyone is going to think you're the greatest at what you've done, and will rate you accordingly based upon some of the much better options they've been given to compare to your work. So before you go off the handle, think of that. Far as the revenge bit goes, I'll tell you that while I am not obsessed with revenge, especially where it concerns a pimple like you, it is a personal hobby of mine. And hell, who doesn't enjoy seeing an asshole get kicked in the balls - which I'm sure you have. That leads to what I attempted next.



So, like Lestat running to Armand requesting justice, but with much, much less zeal, I approached the current Society she was in. This Coven, lead by Wolvie, Sanctuary I think, is where I found her. As I could find no one else of authority from the Coven online, I contacted dracken and sent him the following message:



On 22:45:30 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) MrD wrote:



Hello Dracken, I believe we may have spoken once before, though I can't recall. I am Mr. D, Master of Les Enfants de Mon Dieu.



I wanted to ask you, as a Trade Master of your Coven, have you been given the go ahead to make decisions about certain trades independent of authorization from your superiors. Say, for example, the trade of an inconsequential member of your Coven?



- D





On 22:47:49 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) dracken wrote:



well i ask 4 permission when trades are concerned





On 22:49:45 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) MrD wrote:



That's a pity, I was hoping you could be of some assistance to me in clearing up a matter. I'll just speak to the Master directly then. Thank you for your time.



- D





So, I had no luck on getting my hands on that little troll yet. Strike one. So, I went on to write Wolvie this message:



On 23:09:34 Jul 20 2009 (-0 GMT) MrD wrote:



Hello, Wolvie. Firstly, thank you for taking the time to read my little note. I'll get straight to the point.



One of your members has been rather rude and childish to me in private messages, despite my kind replies, and I feel that this users conduct is deserving of 'special' attention. This would not require you to do anything but transfer this person over to me as a favor or at a lower cost, as I have not much in the way of favor since I am just starting out again. As part of the deal, I could promise you a personal rating of ten from me to all of your Coven members.



I understand my offer is menial, but it is what I have to offer at this time. From Master to Master, I can assure you that I do not forget favors done in good faith, and I am not without pull.



The name of the user is DarkRaven. I do hope you'll consider my proposition and hopefully transfer this user to Les Enfants de Mon Dieu. I would very much appreciate your attention in the matter, as it is my strong feeling that behavior such as this should not remain unchecked. As a side not, I would rather you not confer with this member about the transaction, as I wish it to be a surprise to them. I have my reasons. Besides, I believe my offer, small as it is, is worth more in the long run than what such a user would likely contribute to your Coven anyway. Thank you.



- D





This was a shot in the dark. I don't have much favor to work having just started out and I wasn't willing to expend much and waste the favor that my current membership works hard for, but I had to offer something. So I thought maybe I would just offer to whore out my rate - because I'm a hypocrite - to his Coven members to sweeten the deal, because hey, who couldn't use a little extra boost. This is the message I got back.





On 19:11:28 Jul 21 2009 (-0 GMT) Wolvie wrote:



Hi MrD,



I will look into the matter but I do not trade members into or out of my coven against their will.



Wolvie™





Oh well, Wolvie is a tender one, it looks like. And despite being denied the pleasure of blinding his member and making her a slave in my Coven, I don't hold that Coven's personal philosophy against them. This was all well and good, as by this point in time, I had lost all interest in the matter anyway. I had transitioned into reading about a growing art form called "moss graffiti" - so Fucking Cool! I recommend you Google it.



But yeah, that's that. I'm not going to be petty and suggest that you go and RATE THIS PERSON A SOLID 1 because SHE DESERVES IT or anything thing childish like that *wiggles fingers mystically*, I'm rather just going to leave it at that, and move on. Point illustrated.



Note: This user has since unblocked me, how kind.. it's a positive start for her. Though I doubt the reasons were altruistic. Oh by the way, I've still got you're rating of 10 ..might wanna change that up.. yeah.



- D

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Xzavier
02:27 Jul 24 2009

You're an evil horrible person! Wanna go out? ;) haha jk



I never understood the whole "don't come to my profile" thing. The whole purpose of a profile is to tell the world about yourself or whatever you want to talk about. The whole reason for ratings is for others to judge your profile. If you don't want people coming to your profile or rating you honestly then don't have a profile. Seems rather simple to me.

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sahahria
02:34 Jul 24 2009

ooooo shall I poke your eyes out so you can't see the profile anymore? After all, you can't physically go there... you can only visually go there... but... well.. heh ;)

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Maledicta
06:15 Jul 24 2009

She's especially childish considering she quite clearly states on her profile that she expects an honest rate. Personally, I reckon you were being generous with a 5 -)

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xoXPinkyXox
06:34 Jul 25 2009

I find this extremely humorous, and just downright evil. I like it.



You are a fantastic writer.

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