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Today was a sad day. 14 years ago my mother was murdered. I don't know why I haven't been able to let go, but I haven't. I try to tell myself that she wouldn't want it that way, but my fucking mind just won't let me forget. I dream about it all the time. I wasn't even there, but I guess my brain wants to play out some scenerio in my head, therefore I dream about it. It's like a really fucked up movie that I'm forced to sit and watch over and over again. So maybe tomorrow will be better. Thats what I tell myself on a daily basis. Well goodnight me.