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CONTENT ADVISORY!!!!



I write this for the sole purpose of letting all of whom get hurt feelings easy know… these stories, thou based upon actual people and happenings are extremely exaggerated and complete parodies. If one doesn't know the true meaning of parody I highly recommend the use of a dictionary before continuing. If you get your feelings hurt or take offense to anything written now or in the future then it is my personal opinion that you take life much too seriously and should consider avoiding my blogs entirely. They are written for entertainment only, not to slander bash or otherwise bad mouth any person who is included in them. TAKE A FUCKING PILL!!!!!!!!!!! I like all of you unless other wise stated in previous conversation that I DON'T.



The End



Thank you and you may now continue on to the more entertaining section of all of this.







Wandering Small Bushhead







The night began at a slow pace. None of the true Sirens came to the Siren fair convention held weekly at the Coven of Inebriation. Not till late in all truth. So there stood Brilliant Flower with Crown of Bubbles (in short known as Bubble Flower) and Light Eye Soft Foot (also known in short as Soft Foot) chatting with Altitudinous One and Bumptious One. Chatting of nothing really, mainly of the previous adventures the Coven had had. Sharing tales of the sacred Inebriation and such. Then slowly the sirens came.... being called by the new Siren attracter. Slowly but surely Bubble Flower began the art of Inebriation Distribution, Soft Foot followed shortly behind. Both of which stopped briefly to jabber at Fair Freckled Shadow Smile (Shadow Smile) a fellow Inebriation Distributor who had the opportunity to not join in the ritual of the day.



The night went on. The sirens slowly began to become more relaxed in there actions and song. The night drew to a close and the stumbling sirens were ushered out of the door. Leaving just the Distributors inside to restore order to the savage unruly garbage upchuck. The Smaller Gender's of the Coven (being Bubble Flower and Soft Foot) came to the idea to have a conference at the Intergalactic House of Spamcakes their favorite eatery. Once the final ritual was completed Altitudinous One relinquished the exiting spears to Bumptious One to release the Smaller Genders out of the Coven.



After being released into the outside world of darkness Soft Foot and Bubble Flower meet with Skycap and venture off to the Eatery.



Once they arrive being so well known they place themselves without help in there normal conferencing table and begin chattering about the events that had occurred that evening. Bubble Flower spoke of the table of Sirens that refused to relinquish any offerings at all and of others who choose the smallest possible offering to give. As the three sit and chat they realize that they haven't even been seen by the assigned eats distributor. As the realization occurred around the corner "Snails Pace Expecting" walks. She claims to have not seen them seating themselves as always. By this point they are all three fairly unsettled and ready to drink and eat. After ordering their chosen nourishments Snails Pace toddles away. They again, began to speak of recent happenings and the things that had unsettled them that day. Bubble Flower whose heart was set afire during the evening by the vision of a small helpless one being used for older helpless ones amusement was only amplified by the Sirens that chose to seat them selves in her worship area that night.



As conversations continue all notice a strange helpless one enter with an older helpless one. Soft foot, Bubble Flower, and Skycap all bestow the title of Bushhead on him, only using appearance rather than birth given name. The novelty of the strange Bushhead wears and they go back to previous conversation. When it dawns on all three of them that they still sit with empty tables. No nourishment has been brought to them though there has been plenty of allotted time for such. Already in an anxious strange mood, Soft foot decides to stand and search for Snails Pace. Gritting teeth in hunger and already mild frustration goes to begin the search, when she nearly collides with Bushhead pardoning her rude behavior. Only to hear the helpless one retort "Yes Excuse me Baby." To which she spins abruptly on her heals to send the stare of wrath and pointing a condemning finger his way…. The flashes of how he would be a nice portrait of pain on her walls and the terrible things that should be done to such rude and ignorant behavior pass she continues to glare. As the Bushhead shrinks back in reprimand, Soft Foot regains composure, turns to continue her journey to search for Snails Pace and the requested nourishments. Finding her and trying with much difficulty to express the extent of their famished bodies to Snails Pace politely. Ending up stammering in incomplete sentences about how cannibalism is likely to happen if something isn't done soon. Snails Pace nods and offers little in response other than "Yeah ok." This only furthers Soft Foot's moment of irritation. She returns to her fellow peers, whom are still in fits of giggles from the near fatal accident between the strange Wandering Bushhead and Soft Foot. With in a short time Snails Pace rounds the corner bearing the Nourishment. All rejoice and accept their allotted amounts of food stuffs.



As the group begins to eat Soft foot realizes how terribly WRONG hers is. In extreme disappointment she comments to Snails Pace about the missing condiment. Snails pace retorts "Yeah, yeah, I left it on the counter. I'll be back with it." So in a slight huff Soft Foot begins to eat her starch sticks in a very unhappy fashion. Making note to the others of the horrible distribution and how she has no idea how Snails Pace ever made it to the level she is at the Nourishment Coven. Also making reference to Bubble Flower of the tiny form of offerings that she had received that night and how she might contemplate the use of them on Snails Pace out of meanness.



During this Lorgnette, Bubble Flowers follower that had been chatting with the smaller genders earlier, makes mention of Soft Foots habitual way of eating. At which point Soft Foot decides to stop her Nourishment ritual all together. Scowling down at her ground cow on grain in the beginnings of becoming chilled the already anxious frustration builds. Watching as Snails Pace delivers to all others on several occasions still not bearing her missing ingredient Soft Foot begins to create incoherent half sentences finally starting to rise to attempt to distribute her own missing condiment Lorgnette stands and offers in apology to retrieve it for her.



Lorgnette readies himself for the tedious venture into the dark Area of Makings in the Intergalactic House of Spamcakes to retrieve the missing items. As the others sit and devour their foodstuffs the random Bushhead who had already been reprimanded by Soft Foot in non verbal terms to stay clear again makes a last ditch effort to draw the attention of the Smaller Genders of the Coven of Inebriation to himself. He staggers over as if beaten and otherwise inebriated. This being wholly against the Covens most sacred code of innocence and inebriation distribution. Thus only upsetting Bubble Flower much more. Her noticing the streak of those attributing to the painful upset of small helpless ones being introduced to less innocent things far to soon. The small wandering Bushhead staggers to the conferencing area on the side of the Smaller Genders Chosen table and awkwardly places his liquid substance container down and tosses his garment of less than attractive shape onto the seat and abandons it. Leading to extremely befuddled looks on all of those who witness this act face. In all of the strange happenings Lorgnette returns safely from his journey bearing the fruits of the missing condiment and graciously offers them to Soft Foot. Now put to a slight ease she bestows the lost condiment on her ground cow and grain and FINALLY is able to begin the enjoyment of nourishment. As if by sorcery Snails Pace appears holding the condiment. Soft Foot looks up and shines a brief smile and shoos her away making visible the already retrieved missing item. With haste Snails Pace leaves only to return again bearing the offering notice. To which the Gathering grins menacingly about. What evil thoughts begin traveling through there minds.



During the debate of how the offerings will be split and given to Snails Pace the Small Bushhead and partner in crime are being once again scolded for strange behavior. At this point they have received their allotment of foodstuffs. Then comes the strange erratic behavior of the Bushhead. His random retrieval of his liquid substance container and then the crash heard throughout the Intergalactic House of Spamcakes, this undeniable sound comes from the tossing of liquid container onto the ground. With all eyes now on him he merely brushes the mess from himself and continues his strange questionable acts.



At this point the Gathering of Smaller Genders has started digging into their offering receptacles for the smallest form of offerings possible. They lay them upon the table each with a different amount along with their notice. They all stand and begin the steps to exit when they again notice the strange behavior of the Small Wandering Bushhead. Though they were doing less than nice things for Snails Pace they had a moment of heartfelt concern and then decided to deliver their offerings to her in person. Soft Foot being the one of no moral conscience opted to be the one who delivers it. They begin the journey to find Snails Pace finding her near the exit. This of course made it much easier for Soft Foot. With a menacing smile and a handful of small offering she hands it off to Snails Pace offering a false apology and skips out of the exit with the others of the Coven giggling madly.



End











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