We all know folk who make us quake in our boots. Folk who put the fear of Transformers upon us. These folk are rarely as bad as we make them out to be, quite often they are pussycats when you get to know them properly. Someone who I have yet to meet but have admired for his acerbic wit, is one of those formidable folk. More scarey than a stern headteacher, more fierce than a horrible rabies affliction, and more mysterious than a leprechaun, is Master Vamp Daire the Master of The House of Caomhnoir-an-Eolas.
I simply had to interview him, I wanted to know if he had built a castle in the sky or merely lived in one, if his notebook scribbles had drawn the attention of Sigmund Freud yet, and if he was as batty as Batman...
Knocking at his door, I shuddered and made the sign of the cross, I really could be landing myself in hot water here I thought...as I was called in to his library, I struggled to see Daire behind the cloud of green haze...that scared the crap out of me and I stammered my first question...
Who is Daire?
"Daire is Daire. I often get asked what my real name is as a lot of people think that Daire is just a screen name. However my real, given name is Daire, why hide behind a screen name?"
Straight to the point, no messing was Daire. (Phew, I thought at least he didn't bite my head off...with my heart in my mouth, I ventured my next question), I decided I should ask about the House he ran. Tell me about Caomhnoir-an-Eolas, what makes your house the one to aspire to?
He snorted and said:
"Well in the beginning I was heavily involved in running every aspect of the House and I think that came across as we held the number 1. position for months. However I ended up losing two of my assistant house masters when Cancer promoted them both to become fellow Admin. I think that was a real blow to the house, although I don't place blame on anyone, it is just a matter of fact.
Since then we have hovered around 2nd and 3rd place and finally coming to rest here in 4th. I didn't want to make a point of booting out members for the sake of ratings as I felt it was better to maintain the house as it was in the beginning and work upwards from there. With that being said I would like to mention that the house is at the moment undergoing extreme over-hauling and I would hope this will increase member activity".
Ok, I said. I have heard about your rating policy and I have to say it takes a brave soul to apply that strategy to every profile. What about all the noobs who threaten e-violence when you rate them what they rightly deserve for their unadulterated crappy creations, do their badass attitudes ever scare you?
(Well, I knew a stupid question had just left my lips with that... of course he was never scared of e-thugs. Oh well, I bravely waited for my answer...)
"The only thing that scares me about the noobs we are seeing these days is the depths of their stupidity. If there is one downside to the internet it is that it has given the dangerously stupid a place to voice their opinions.
As for them complaining about the ratings they receive, I usually just remind them that any rating they offer me in retaliation is going to have very little effect on me Vs. my rating on them coupled with the weight of my 6 years on VR".
Now, I couldn't quibble with that, here was a guy who stood up for what he believed in, he would never kiss the Blarney Stone. I admired his forthrightness and felt braver every second I lasted with my head intact...In fact, I now could see what an all-round nice guy Daire really was. Now, we are all dying to know if Daire has a gentle side, I said, tell me whats the thing that gets you all gooey, does Daire have a soppy side to him?
"I have a soft spot for heroic archetypes and self-sacrifice. That and dogs, I like dogs".
That was pretty cool (but damnably evasive. I had really wanted to know if he liked romantic films, or strolling in the grounds of his castle. Oh well, I guess some things are best left to the imagination...) I knew he wasn't as mean as we all thought he was. Growing a set of balls all of a sudden, I decided to ask him if he had any embarassing whelp moments he could share with us?
"When I was a whelp on VR there wasn't much you could do to make a fool of yourself. This was in the days before journals, before the Vamp Box and long before blasting. The only moment of "oops" I can recall is on my first day as admin I cleared a large section of the VR forums having completely forgotten that forum posts make up a fragment of peoples levelling scores. Oh well, live and learn".
Hah! It was great to know that the admins were in fact human! I had wondered...I laughed and wound up my interview with this last question: if you ruled the universe for a day, what would you do?
Daire thought a little, then told me this:
"I would make the difficult decisions modern politics doesn't allow fat, bloated, bank fed politicians to make. In fact it would probably be very similar to my experience on VR. I would have a set agenda in my head and stick to it rigidly and would no doubt make a lot of noisy enemies. But at the end of the day I think the world would be a better place as a result of my hard line approach".
Brilliant! We needed more straight-talking folk in this world, no nonsense types like Daire. I have to say that this interview had been the most difficult to pull together, but I had learned something very important from it. Daire had a great sense of humour, he wasn't in the least horrible, he could be pretty vague when questions were asked, but more importantly, the famous Daire-ierre was as awesome as folk who knew him claimed it to be.
Thanks Daire!
**UPDATE: Daire was last seen...well, thats just it, nobody had seen Daire for ages he must have been busy defending his castle.
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Page last updated: Jun 29 2011
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COMMENTS
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dragonspawn
10:34 Jun 29 2011
love it the way you write pulls the reader in :)
PAGAN
10:45 Jun 29 2011
Thanks Dragonspawn. The folk themselves are what makes the interview good though :D
Joli
17:18 Jun 29 2011
When he's really scary, just picture him in his underwear. Then remember that he has an Irish accent...how scary can he be? He ummm doesn't read comments, does he? Naaah.
PAGAN
17:35 Jun 29 2011
Nah, he doesn't read comments, we can say anything we want about him here LOL
radu
22:29 Jun 29 2011
Daire is the Best Master Vampire VR has ever had and will ever have,
PAGAN
22:38 Jun 29 2011
He's pretty cool Radu.
Vampirewitch39
23:01 Jun 29 2011
He really is a nice man. We only started talking about a year ago- but he is always open to any questions I have or seeking any help. :)
Flannery
01:49 Jun 30 2011
I see him in his underwear every day Joli. It's pretty scary.
Sulks
07:28 Jun 30 2011
o.O Flannery LOL