Welcome to my page.
My name is unimportant and trivial compared to all the various details of myself I could list, however, I will include it purely due to boredom; Mishayla. I am eighteen years old and reside in a small town that sometimes seems like hell. I admire all things natural and have a great appreciation for the cynical and dark view on life. I am very close to animals so if you are an individual who hurts animals for fun we will not get along. I feel it my duty to stand up for them considering they cannot stand up for themselves. My passion in life is helping the world and the people whom inhabit it, therefore I wish to become a doctor in the distant future and to join the peace core in the near future. I enjoy humor and love to laugh. I am shy and normally the girl with a thick book in her nose, reading absentmindedly in a corner. I love Stephen King and Dean Koontz and I love murder mysteries and the human brain, especially associated with multiple personality disorders. My favorite colors are black and red. My favorite animal is the wild horse, or my Great Dane, Snicker Doodle. I love long walks and the fall. I love Halloween and writing. I am fiercefully loyal and enraged when anyone messes with those closest to me or those who cannot protect themselves. I honestly feel I am an empath. I have a great connection to people and there emotions. If you don't believe in empaths, that is fine, it is only an opinion I possess, not a fact. I am just here looking for friends and a darker side of the internet world. Message or bite me if you wish to know anything else or to engage in a further conversation.
MY PROTECTOR
http://i1209.photobucket.com/albums/cc391/DorvaineRambuska/VR%20Protection/angel_of_death_SinfulAngel.jpg
The following are some simple poems and a song I wrote awhile back.
MANY THINGS
I am many things to many people
I am the girl next door
The one who your parents make you wave to when tending the lawn, out of a respect of kindness
I am the nerd
The girl who always has her nose stuck in a 700 page book, finishing it in a day or less
I am the fighter
The one who will argue till she is out of breath because I don’t give in
I am the helper
The girl who always tries to better peoples lives only to find out she has wrecked them even more
I am ugly
The one who will never be as pretty as “her” in your eyes
I am a nobody
I am the girl who has many friends but is never considered popular
I am kind
The one who takes a person no one likes and tries to turn there lives into something more than rejection
I am strong
The girl who never cries, despite how much she hurts inside
I am a mother
The one who has taken care of her little brother and sister since she was nine, never once complaining
I am a whore
The girl who wouldn’t put out so you spread awful rumors about her
I am a friend
The one who will never be more than anything else because I am more like ‘one of the guys’
I am many things to many people
And I try my hardest to make people like and accept me for who I am
But to you…..I will never be good enough
To you….I am second best, just another face in the crowd telling me I am nothing…worthless…
And you know what?
You’re right.
I am many things…
By: ME
Much like with other things
There are two sides of “Shay”
The one I choose for you to see
And the other I lock away
The one that is bluntly seen
Is the kind and happy me
The smiling, out going, nice girl
That everyone wants to see
But I’m angry and enraged
Behind this fare façade
I’m strange and weird in everyway
Something rather odd
I hide all my feelings
Of the cruel world we live in
I cry each and every night
About the way my life has been
Perhaps someday everyone
Will except the me inside
Perhaps one day I’ll look back
And regret that I lied
But that day is very far from now
Which is obvious to see
So for now I will have to
Stay the “normal” and “accepted” me
BY: Me
‘The Last Candle’
Blow the last candle out
Let the wax harden
I wish I could stop crying
I’m getting to far in
Looking in your eyes
As you rip my heart out
Feels like I will die
With all your sudden doubt
I thought we’d be together
Till the day we died
I never would have known
You’d be the one to say good bye
Blow the last candle out
Let the wax harden
I wish I could stop crying
I’m getting to far in
Now laying on my bed
All alone and full of pain
Can’t get you out of my head
Feel as if I’ll soon go insane
Seeing you in another mans arms
Knowing you can suppress my hurt
But you go on causing my heartache
Your nothing but a liar and a flirt
Blow the last candle out
Let the wax harden
I wish I could stop crying
I’m getting to far in
Now I’m all alone in this house
Feeling worn down and dead
Remembering back………
To all the things you said
The knife is calling my name
And who am I to refuse
Your all I had in my sad, life
What have I left to lose?
So maybe I’ll just end it
It’s not as if you’d care
I’ll put an end to this misery
As this life is cruel and unfair
So I will….
Blow the last candle out
And let the wax harden
I will finally stop crying
When this hell of mine ends
By: Me
These next two songs totally describe my personality. So if you wish to know me at all, you should consider reading the lyrics.
SWEATING BULLETS
Hello me... Meet the real me
And my misfits way of life
A dark black past is my
Most valued possession
Hindsight is always 20-20,
But looking back it's still a bit fuzzy
Speak of mutually assured destruction?
Nice story... Tell it to Reader's Digest!
Feeling paranoid
True enemy or false friend?
Anxiety's attacking me, and
My air is getting thin
I'm in trouble for the things
I haven't got to yet
I'm chomping at the bit, and my
Palms are getting wet, sweating bullets.
Hello me... It's me again
You can subdue, but never tame me
It gives me a migraine headache
Thinking down to your level
yea, just keep on thinking it's my fault
And stay an inch or two outta kicking distance
Mankind has got to know
His limitations
Feeling claustrophobic
Like the walls are closing in
Blood stains on my hands and
I don't know where I've been
I'm in trouble for the things
I haven't got to yet
I'm sharpening the axe and my
Palms are getting wet, sweating bullets
Well, me... it's nice talking to myself
A credit to dementia
Some day you too will know my pain
And smile its blacktooth grin
If the war inside my head
Won't take a day off I'll be dead
My icy fingers claw your back
Here I come again
Feeling paranoid
True enemy or false friend?
Anxiety's attacking me
And my air is getting thin
Feeling claustrophobic
Like the walls are closing in
Blood stains on my hands and
I don't know where I've been
Once you committed me
Now you've acquitted me
Claiming validity
For your stupidity
I'm chomping at the bit
I'm sharpening the axe
Here I come again, whoa!
Sweating bullets
Bring Me To Life lyrics
How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb
Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home
Wake me up
(Wake me up inside)
I can't wake up
(Wake me up inside)
Save me
(Call my name and save me from the dark)
Wake me up
(Bid my blood to run)
I can't wake up
(Before I come undone)
Save me
(Save me from the nothing I've become)
Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life
Wake me up
(Wake me up inside)
I can't wake up
(Wake me up inside)
Save me
(Call my name and save me from the dark)
Wake me up
(Bid my blood to run)
I can't wake up
(Before I come undone)
Save me
(Save me from the nothing I've become)
I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside
Bring me to life
Frozen inside without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are the life among the dead
All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
Without thought, without voice, without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life
Wake me up
(Wake me up inside)
I can't wake up
(Wake me up inside)
Save me
(Call my name and save me from the dark)
Wake me up
(Bid my blood to run)
I can't wake up
(Before I come undone)
Save me
(Save me from the nothing I've become)
I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside
Bring me to life
