The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

More about me
What is your name? Tara, but I prefer to be called Ivy
How old are you? 22
When is your Birthday? 9-10-1983
What is your zodiac sign?
Where were you born? Mississippi...hell whole
Where do you live now? Florida... to much sun
What color are your eyes? multi changing but normally green
What color is your hair? black and blue
How tall are you? 4'11--- B(o)(o)b level XD
How much do you weigh? 125
What is your race? caucasian
What is your worst fear? dieing alone
Do you smoke? restarted ooooppssie
Do you drink? only when I go out with friends
Do you cuss? fuck ya always
Do you use drugs? some
Have you or will you ever steal? along time ago, I was 5 it was candy
Are you dependable and/or trustworthy? yes I do believe
Do you play in a band or play an instrument? no, I want to learn to play a 6 string bass gutair
Do you have any tattoos and/or piercings? 4 tattoos and 2 piercings
If you had a favorite serial killer who would it be? hum....Zodiac killer
Do you suffer from depression disorder? yes...who doesn't?
If you had a choice about how you wanted to die what would it be? in the middle of sex, I wanna go out with a big bang
Have you ever tried to commit suicide? yes, a few times
Have you ever purposely caused harm to yourself or someone else? myself yes others no
What subculture do you belong too? I don't know, what do you label me as?
Are you evil? yes, definately
Do you believe that you can be possesed? yes
Are you a paranoid? who said that, damn those voices again!
Do you ever get jealous of somebody else? sometimes, as I watch their heads explode
Are you obsessive and/or compulsive? only sometimes, washing blood of hands
Are you a violent person? only 70% of the time, (hidding the bodies)
Do you take your anger out on other people? nope
Do you blame other people for your mistakes? nope
What is your favorite game? hum...let me get back to you on that...
What is your favorite movie? to many to list one would be sin city
Who is your favorite band? him, placebo, viccent voltaire...
What is your favorite song? Whe your evil
What kind of books do you read? Ann Rice or anything to do with Vampires, and anything scary
What is your favorite color? black/red
What is your favorite food? ice cream
What is your favorite drink? mountain dew
Do you skateboard? yep,
Do you watch wrestling? nope
Do you study martial arts? plan on it
Do you own a pair of converse? nope
Do you own a pair of dickies? yep
Would you ever kill yourself or someone else? someone else only if they hurt my family
Are you a virgin? HAHAHA, uh no. I'm a ninpho its impossible to be a virgin...
Are you kinky? definately
Do you like biting? oh yes
Do you watch pornography? every now an then
Have you ever dyed your hair an unusual color? yessss I have.....
Are you hyper active person? sometimes
Do you like to write poetry? yes, I love to write
Do you like to do your own photography? yes
Do you like modeling and/or acting? no
Do you have any self inflicted scars? only by stupidity, wrists
Are you religious? to a point i am
Do you stand for originality and creativity? yes i do
Do you believe in vampires? Definately
Does pain turn you on? sometimes
Do you believe in witchcraft? yes
Have you ever played a oiuja board or used tarot cards? yes i do
Do you like to rave or go to clubs often? sometimes if i had more time yes
Do you go to many concerts? yes
Do you like meeting new people and hanging out? yes
What do you like most about life? my own little world
What do you dislike most about life? working at a shitty job, and stupidity in others.
Do you believe in love at first fright? i dunno ask me

Darkness that follows


Once I was the happy girl standing in the light,
but the shadows stalked their prey,
Everyone said my future was so bright,
all until one day,
Then I was the outcast,and the loner,
I stood silently in the dark,
I stared out at the world that I no longer...
belonged to, I was dressed to dark,
I walked quietly, ignoring the whispers,
ignoring the truth, I no longer wanted to be apart of their dreams, I wanted to follow my own heart,
Even though it was denied, I was to be as they wanted me to be.
I shed my old skin and became who I am, the darkness that followed me was my shadow, which didn't lie. I was the darkness that followed.



Darkness that follows

Darkness follows me where ever I go,
walking always all alone,
feeling I am at that low,
to saddened that they are gone,
memories remain,
driving my mind to the brink,
reminders of the pain,
into the darkness I begin to sink....



Alone again

Here I sit alone again,
wishing I was dead,
all I hear is that its a sin,
ringing in my head,

I just want to be left alone,
to die in my own room,
don't really have my own home,
all I see is my doom,

and silently I scream for death,
I look to the door,
to take that final breath,
as my blood begins to pour.



Time...

I walked along the river side I had no idea that it was time,
his long fingers streached out and took my hand,
coldness rushed over my body and soul, now I really had no goal,
I had no choice to stay or go it was my time,
so I walked with him the rest of my journey to the eternal gates,
I softly closed my eyes...and finally realized I had no time to play,
No time to wait,
it was now or never so I walked inside and thats all I can remember was I had no time.....



I am bored here is my madness

roses are dead,
violets are too,
sugar is sweet,
and so are you....



.......Mildly insane tonight...

Darkness covers my room,
only the sound of your impending doom,
silent screams fill the night,
you were taken by my might,
I dance across the stage,
I can sense your rage,
I lost the love you gave,
now no longer your slave...

1/9/2005



Sighs softly and looks at the floor.

Time for a poem...

I sit alone in a dark room,
always crying out in pain,
my sadness seems to loom,
as always its in vain,
Wanting nothing but happiness,
wishing for a better day,
surrounded by the loneliness,
realizing there is only one way,
slice away the pain,
removing all the fear,
deep into the vein,
knowing that no one will hear,
as I bleed away,
Not my mother will I miss,
there are no words for me to say.
and the fires of hell will hiss,
In hell she will hear my Rage,
I will scream it loud and clear,
now that I have escaped her cage.
she will hear me and will fear....
for her pain will be thrice whats mine.....




The love that withstands the test of time

I was sure our love would withstand the test of time,
Unfortunately I was dead wrong,
Your lies I believed,
That was my first of many mistakes,
You found another; to afraid to hurt me,
You kept her secret,
She was your lover the one you desired,
She held you close on those cold nights,
While I lay cold and heart broken in my bed,
Knowing I was second in your heart,
To someone else…
I cursed my heart for loving you,
I walked out into the cold dark night,
I hoped I would soon find peace,
He drifted out of the shadows,
His dark eyes told of danger,
But it was to late to stop him,
Silently without a warning his arms embraced me,
Death wrapped his cold fingers around my heart,
Held me in his never-ending embrace,
Telling me of a love that would last all time,
Remembering those words spoken before,
Knowing it was a beautiful lie,
I asked him for one small favor,
“What do you desire?” he said.
“Let me walk the earth forever…to search for true love.”
He granted my desire,
But not without a consequence…
I have immortality…but my skin is cold to the touch,
My heart became ice… until I find the love that lasts forever…
My old lover wept at my touch,
His life he did bargain for,
But the ice was too hard to break,
His screams for mercy were not heard,
I shattered the bones in his body with my discontentment,
He suffered profoundly,
Before death came to him,
No words did I need to express,
He held out his arms for my embrace,
I was not meant for the world,
Gently I went into his embrace,
There I found the love that could not perish.




In death would I?

In death would i be happier?
Would the pain be erased?
Would darkness embrace me?
Would time have no meaning?
An escape from the pain,
confusion,
hate,
anger,
love,
lust,
sadness,
and being alone...
To Let the darkness bind me and return to its arms.
To leave the fear behind me.
To dance this dance no more,
play this empty role,
to live no longer,
to cease to exist,
to be the person that all others want,
no never,
in death forever being who I am,
the reject,
the loser,
the lost cause,
the embaresment,
the slut,
the whore,
the fuck up,
the disapointment,
the neglected,
stronger by such words,
more then that I rember being called,
I cling to that little string of hope as its
quickly snatched away...all I want is peace and everlasting.
they say that it beats the alternative....but how do they know, they have not experianced that alternative the other side they have not embraced death they have no idea whats on the other side,
I have embraced death,
it could take me now,
no many would care.
And even then they would go on living.
I have felt deaths embrace twice,
once by my own hands,
drowning myslf in a lake..(damn assholes and mouth to mouth)
and once by anothers hand, (car accident)
only by that fleeting moment of calm was i truely at peace....
In death I was happy and in death I should have remained,
Unable to screw up the lives of others that think they love me.
They can not love me, I have no Idea "Who I am"
and even then they love in vain...
'You can not love another if you do not love yourself"
so For once it will not be "I" that cries in vain,
But it is i that SCREAMS in pain.....