I am currently a Journalist major at the University of North Texas, and have a part time job at the library. I am new to this website, so add me, and make a really cool friend, I need them. I would not term myself the label of "Gothic," even though my tenancies consist of wearing dark clothes most of the time, living nocturnally, longing for death, dark and crude imagination, and body mutilation as a liesured curriculum. At times I enjoy living, when I associate myself with others that wish to die young as I do, to fuck up thier lives to it's fullest, and croke with no regrets. The best way to die in my opinion, would be to scalpel your flesh, revealing the crimson morrow of life, that holds the hidden taste of your emotions. Feel free to share some with your friends. Cruscify yourself, iron maiden yourself as a guilt offering for anything you believe in. I believe in nothing, thus I would be doing it for my own sheer pleasure and amusement. After every fresh drop of blood has been succombed by your friends. Allow them to have your lovely bones to smoke and decorate thier house with as according to how they see fit, and make glitter out of your ashes. Whoa, I'm beginning to get hungry. Enjoy my page that is currently a work in progress. No semen, urination, defocation, or regirgitation remains allowed, and please clean up your oewn sacrificial blood. Enjoy the site, and fan mail of all kinds is thoroughly accepted. Have a nice throat slit.
I consider self-mutilating to be a personal hobby and interest of mine I have various inflicted scars that are located geographicall on various parts of my body. Most tend to be my wrists and arms. I draw much satisfaction from pain infliction, when such a feeling exists. Mostly internal pain and confliction are the feelings that consume me. Isolation from the world is quite common for me. I do not condemn the practice of mutilation on others if they are willing. It is quite common among various factions of my companions. A lot of my internal pain is deeply expressed in my journal entries, in which I highly encourage you to read. Blood orgies and other interactions dealing with metallic objects and galore are communions and festivities to be nourished and cherished.
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Though, I am not homosexual, personally, and individually, it is wide spread among my social group, the gothic counter-culture, and human liberation. I am in full support of thier social advancement in society. I consider lesbians to be divine and very inspirational. In dealing with my struggles with theological conflictions, I once used to be a devoted Christian. I turned from the faith, being persecuted by the alleged followers, accused of being demonic for associating myself with more peaceful people that weren't "Christians," and allegedly damned to Hell for thier disbelief. I am most certain that if Jesus were alive today, he would condemn all of thier persecutions, and they woulbe be the first to face judgment, due to the internal contempt they have for others with independant ideals, and hatred for what they consider to be "false" beliefs. I praciced the art of Witch Craft, Gnosicism, Divination, and other Occultic practices for some time, and became quite educated in the philosophical and ethical realms. There was no individual man-made belief that I could practice and put faith in, in fullness, so I fell away in solitude, and turned to the path of the agnostic. I am very willing to have a peaceful conversation of spiritual, theological, or societal customs in a peaceful and educated state of mind. If you are here to argue with me, and hatefully criticize me for my personal values, then I refuse to speak to you. Radicals and fundamentalists would be better off speaking with thier hands, or condemning brick walls than try to convert someone here with a condemning attitude and hateful nature. I am very nocturnally natured, and I love being in the midst of the moonlight. I only value the sun's reflection off of the moon, and regretfully walk among it for everyday priorities. If it was possible for nature to be in motion and sustain life without sunlight, I would be a far more cheerful person, yet, I understand that without suffering, there cannot be compassion. Without depression and contempt, there would be no inspiration for most of the material in my art and literature.
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WHAT ROCK BAND R U?? (COOL PICS)
SLIPKNOT
AWSUME UR ONE OF THE GREATEST ROCK BANDS EVER! THEY KICK ASS! U LIKE LOUD MUSIC AND LIKE TO HEADBANG! U HATE PRESIDENT BUSH AND I DONT BLAME U!!!
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Which Marilyn Manson Single Are You?
Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)
You are Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) from the Smells Like Children album. You're about originality and worlds beyond reality. You like dreams and visual art.
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As far as music is conserned, I do not feel the need to state the obvious, as visually expressed. However, furthermore, in the modern era, I like evanescence, some old school Korn, Disturbed, Cradle of Filth, Otep, A Perfect Circle, Seether, among many others. In music's past, I enjoy the illustrious era of Pantera, Metallica, Guns N' Roses, Jimy Hendrix, Pik Floyd, Meggaddeath, David Bowie, The Cure, Billy Idle, Jimmy Hendrix, The Doors, among too many others to announce. Yet, we all have our own favorite genres of music, so it seems nearly futile to express it, in pursuit of creative content. Some of my favorite literary works and authus would include Anne Rice, J.R.. Tolken, Charles Darwin, Stephen Hawkings, C.S. Lewis, Stephen King, Plato, Socrates, Aristole, among other philosophers, and some of the various witers of the bible, among many others that I'm too lazy to list. Various movies would include both Underworlds, The Crow, Bram Stoker's Dracula, Interview With The Vampire, Queen of the Damned, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, American Pie, American Beauty, X-Men, Bowling For Coumbine, oh, Angels and Demons would be one of my favorite books. I'm not too fond of listing the obvious, because it would be unending. I'm a very unique individual and a very good friend if I'm given the chance to be. I encourage individuality, exploration of new ideals to define your own truth, deep interaction, and promotion of artistic tallents to be expressed as you see fit, and contribute insight and wisdom to the seeking mind.
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One of my favorite pass times and personal issues is the intake of various drugs. Even some of my other drug addict friends express consern for me, even when forgetting the self-worth of thier own lives. This must be a major contribution to why my mind is flamed with mental defocation, and feuled with spiritual urination. Nevertheless, as previously mentioned, I do not revere my life to be that of much importance. I am not going to ramble about my various drug experiences, or what I have taken. That would be an act of making myself the center of attention, when rather, i only see it as an attribute to my life style. If you wish to ask me, feel free to do so, or read my journal. My entries are very explicit and quite intriguing. Like most people in my circle, I consider sex to be one of the greatest pleasures to induldge in. Considering the pressures, and hard ships of life, what better way to alieviate it, then physical reaction, no matter the same or opposite sex, in accordance to your likeing and choosing. Especially if you have no plans to take drugs, which I encourage in moderation. Drugs can be very inspirational, and are insightful for such many things. Yet many abusers, give them such a bad reputation, thus being only allowed in the hands of medical personnel to sell them to us, and keep us on them until our lives come to a blistering end. Further more, in my expression of the carelessness of my life, I am a Nihilist. A nihilist believes in survival of the fittest among a human race that is ultimately doomed to natural or self-destruction. There is no divine consequence, so without self regulation, the world is practically anarchy. I am not a superstitious person, thus given bad experience, I have contempt for all of organized religion and spirituality that condemns and profits from the ones who believe in nothing. I challenge ANYONE to prove to me the existence of a higher power, and when they have intervened in this world...in my reality, and consienceness it has never happened, and most likely, never will.
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It's been over two years since I've logged into Vampire Rave, and I'm FINALLY back!!! I don't really feel like redoing my entire profile, so I figured I would just update the last couple of years of my life. I am not majoring in Journalism any more. I am majoring in Social Science. The art of studying why people believe what they believe. I've always been curious of the human condition, so I'm studying to be a counselor. The world can never have enough of those. The best thing you can lend someone is an open ear. Unfortunately though, the human condition has been reduced to the excuses of chemicals and profiteering more than exchanging ideas and legitimitely caring for who you're trying to help. If you do not genuinely care about your patients, then you have no business being a counselor. You can learn about yourself by learning about other. I work with children who have mental disabilities. So, sometimes I get to catch scissors thrown across the room, or calm them down by teaching them role playing games. They seem to really enjoy it, and it's very educational! I've been through two failed engagements the past few years. It's okay, though. I've learned a lot from it. We shouldn't try to let others define our lives for us, or define other people's lives. We should let others define themselves, and try to accept them for who they are.
I have become a much more optimistic person the past few months. I don't always have a down cast look to the floor, and my eyes aren't always dialated. lol I've taken up fencing and martial arts. My preferences right now are Jeet Kune Do and Brazilian Jui-Jitsu. If you ever want to talk martial arts and ancient combats, it's one of my main interests. I'm also very interested in theology these days, despite the fact that it has been waning in recent decades. Philosophy has too, but whoever says it's irrelevent must be living in a box. I'm quite finished rambling, but I am a very social person, and a deep thinker, so it's difficult for me to articulate one main idea during conversation when endless thoughts of varied subjects are being expressed all at once. I'm not a very shy person. lol
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