How to Become a Teenage Witch
First of all, you will need to be aged between thirteen and nineteen, any younger or older, and you just don’t qualify - sorry.
Secondly, you need to be a Witch. This is a little more complicated, but at least it’s a little more open - you don’t even need to be a girl. Some people argue that a Witch has to be female, and the male equivalent is a Warlock, but this is disputable, and merely a matter of semantics anyway. If any teenage boys out there want to call themselves Witches, you just go ahead, there are no sexual stereotypes in this missive.
So what does being a Witch entail? Contrary to popular belief, there is more to it than just wearing black clothes and lots of makeup - in fact the black clothes bit is just a relatively modern myth, and if anything, Witches are traditionally accused of wearing too much green. Of course, appearances are a lot to anyone who wishes to make a statement about who they are - particularly teenagers, so getting the image right does count for a lot. Many teenage Witches think that cultivating a sulky frown is an important part of the image, but in truth, it isn’t. I’ve known many powerful Witches who smile most of the time. All the same, if you do feel that a sulky frown is necessary, don’t worry - it will come quite naturally to any teenager.
So what else makes someone a Witch? Some say it’s a lifestyle, but in fact it is far more than just that. You can’t just wear a black skirt and heavy makeup, paint stars on your walls, and then sit back and say “I’m a Witch.” It’s a religion, a faith, a spiritual path if you like. It isn’t an organized religion - in fact, Pagan means just the opposite of organized religion. It’s a folk religion, a religion that is for everyday people living everyday lives, rather than something passed down by an elite group of “holy” specialists.
In olden times, the local Witch would have been the healer and midwife who helped deliver all the babies. They were also the people you’d go to see to have a love spell cast on someone you desire, or to have your fortune told. On the darker side, some would also be consulted on the subject of curses. This is something a lot of Pagans play down, but it would be foolish to pretend it doesn’t happen, and even Christians lay curses on people they don’t like.
On the whole, it’s considered a bad idea to curse people, because everything has a cost, and the karmic cost of cursing is high. Some Witches believe love spells to be unethical too, because it is abusing magical power to infringe on a person’s free will. Think of it this way, how would you like it if you felt impelled to support a sleazy politician and vote for him, because someone had put a spell on you to make you admire him? Obviously, there is no point in having magical powers if you never use them, but remember that all power has the ability to corrupt your mind. Like fire, it can be a useful tool, but it can be dangerously destructive if you let it get out of hand.
A Witch has other skills, apart from magic. One of the most traditional (a real tradition, not made up in the 20th century) is herb lore. A Witch must learn to recognize various different plants, and know what to use them for. Well, in theory anyway - to be honest, I’ve known loads of Witches who know nothing of herb lore, but I consider it very important. It’s not needed so much these days, because most people will go to a doctor, but if we don’t learn it and pass it on, it will become a lost skill. If I were you, I’d learn as much as possible about herb lore, because alternative remedies are becoming more popular, and it’s the sort of thing people will expect you to know.
Another Witch skill that’s in vogue at the moment is crystal lore. Recently, crystal healing has been quite big, but Witches have always known about the spiritual benefits and effects of different gemstones. Stones figure a great deal in Pagan magic, and stone circles are particularly sacred.
Then there is divination - casting horoscopes, reading Tarot cards, casting runes etc. Even cheesy old favorites like reading palms and reading tealeaves are worth learning. Not all Witches are seers or Ovates, and it can be tiring, but it does create an image, and it can be useful. Some of us are naturally inclined to see into the future - and if you are one that can, you will know by now. It’s by no means compulsory, but it’s an option.
There are many other things too; astral travel, communicating with spirits, shape shifting, psionics (telepathy, telekinesis etc), weather magic (a Witch can conjure storms), mixing potions, in fact far more than any one person can learn in one lifetime. There is such a lot to learn, that most Witches tend to specialize in just one area of expertise, and become experts at it.
One of the most important things to learn, is rituals. There are books that will help you, but the point about Paganism is that there is no one right way to do things. This means you can create your own rituals, and as long as you create a set routine for it, it’s still a valid ritual. Believe me, all covens and lone Witches (yes, you don’t have to be in a coven, you can be a lone Witch) have different rituals, and different ways of doing them.
One of the biggest questions is about what to wear. There are many Witches who insist on being ‘Sky-clad’ or naked for a ritual. There are many good reasons for this, which are all valid, but two very good reasons not to. If you are doing your rituals in the open air (as many Witches prefer), you will probably get outsiders gawking (and may get arrested for indecent exposure), and you will get very cold. Some people say that is all part of the discipline, but others say it’s an unnecessary distraction. A lot of Witches will make light, comfortable robes to wear at rituals, but there are some who just wear jeans, woolly jumpers, and anoraks. Sky-clad is the ideal, special ritual robes a second choice, but sometimes you’ve just got to go with fully dressed to be practical.
It brings us rather nicely to witches clothes. As a teenager, you will probably be quite fashion conscious, and even if your parents won’t let you get a tattoo, you are bound to have some unusual piercings. This is a very Pagan thing anyway, and I was into it long before it became fashionable, but do remember that fashions can change very quickly. Clothing, on the other hand, can be discarded much easier. Though witches were usually associated with green or red, the current vogue is for black and purple - with lots of black lace. Though some Witches rather like the black leather mini, most prefer something with more cover (particularly male Witches), and long coats and dresses tend to dominate. Cloaks and ponchos are excellent apparel for male and female Witches, as they are suitable for all weather, give good coverage, are easy to put on or take off, and can be used as blankets. They also look cool on a Witch. Generally, if you go for lots of dark velvet, imitation snake skin and/or fur, with loads of lace, straps, black leather, or chains, you will achieve a look that either says Witch or Rock Chick (or even a Stevie Nicks look).
Footwear is very important to a Witch, and the most popular is hiking boots (particularly Airware), because of the practicality when trekking across hills and countryside. Urban Witches often prefer a stylish knee length pointy toed job, but they are no good for dancing around stone monoliths on Midsummer. You’ve got to think of these things. Either way, you won’t find many Witches wearing designer trainers - it’s just not Witchy. Look after your feet, and they will look after you.
The Tools.
A lot of fuss is made about the tools of Witchcraft, and there are supposed to be traditions that are very important (though nobody can trace them back further than a hundred years). The most controversial is the Pentacle. Every Witch (well, almost every Witch) wears one, and it is recognized as the sign of Witchcraft, yet it isn’t a Pagan symbol at all. There is no evidence that the Kelts or Druids ever used Pentacles (however, they did use a cross, even in pre-Christian times), and it is generally thought to be of Hebrew tradition. In the late Nineteenth and early Twentieth Century, a rise in the popularity of mysticism and the occult led to a lot of ‘New Age’ religions, and most of it was borrowed from the Cabala, and more specifically, the Key of Solomon. If there was any connection with Witchcraft before then, it is almost certainly due to the Inquisition’s attempts to associate Jews with Satanism. The main controversy is the association most non-Pagans make between a Pentacle and Satanism - mainly thanks to those awful Dennis Wheatley movies, like The Devil Rides Out. The other controversy is the question as to which way up it should be worn. Some say with the point down and horns up, because it represents the horned god; whilst others say with the point up, and legs down, because it represents Man (like on the Leonardo Da Vinci drawing), but as it is supposed to represent the station of Earth, I’d say neither argument has any relevance. In other words, the five pointed star itself is merely an affectation, and it is only the circle that matters. Still, it makes a nice symbol that is quickly becoming acceptable, so we may as well go with it. If you prefer, a round or egg shaped stone is a much better symbol though.
The next big tool is the Athame, or sacred knife. Some modern Witches doubt if this was ever really a traditional tool, as there is serious questioning of whether Witches ever practiced sacrifice. It is known that a sickle was used by Druids though, and some form of sacred knife should be used for cutting branches for wands and such. It is used as a symbol for fire (or Air if you are Wiccan), and is a smaller version of the Keltic sword of light (a gift from the Sidh), and according to ‘tradition’ should be handmade of steel, with a boxwood handle. In practice, a lot of Witches use a kitchen knife (something fundamentalist Wiccans frown on), and a lot of showy witches buy specially made chrome finish Athames. It’s up to you - if you think saving something special, just for rituals is important, do that; but if you feel that a tool that is useful, and used regularly is more meaningful, that’s your choice. Some Witches have a sword, a white handled knife, and a black handled knife; but remember, the more expensive magical tools and symbols you have, the further away you get from the simple peasant principles of Pagan Magic.
Do you want a wand, or a broomstick? Neither will actually fly, but again are symbols that help to define you, and focus magical forces. A wand is a fetish, a device that is meant to store magical power like a capacitor, and can be just plane wood, or decorated with crystals and feathers. This really is something that dates back to Pagan times, and is a handy, portable version of the Staff. The broomstick is a disguised staff, and though it serves the same purpose of the wand, is infinitely more useful. Apart from using it to sweep the floor, stripped of it’s bristles it becomes a staff, and can be used to defend yourself with, or as a walking aid when you climb steep hills to gather herbs. The staff and wand are symbols for the station of Air (unless you are Wiccan).
No Witch is complete without a cauldron. Of course, a large cast iron cauldron today would cost a small fortune, and there’s not a lot of room for one in most homes today, but you can get a pretty good cooking pot at a reasonable price. This symbolizes the station of water, and again is a practical tool. It’s another of those faerie gifts that dates back to Keltic times, and was used for cooking broths, strength potions, and stews. I suppose a Pyrex bowl will do just as well - filled with punch perhaps? A lot of covens just have one cauldron for the coven, and each Witch has a cup. The cup goes back to the myth of the Holy Grail, and is traditionally given to the witch as a gift, as it is a symbol, not only of water, but of caring, and serving. It can be a wine glass, a silver goblet, or even a wooden goblet. You could buy or make one of your own, but it is more meaningful if it’s a gift, so ask someone who cares for you to buy it as a Xmas or Birthday present.
Book of Dark Shadows. Apparently, according to a lot of modern Witches, this is an essential book, that is hand-written by each neophyte Witch, and copied from the book of the Priestess or High Priestess. It is a book of rules - a sort of Witches bible, and is sacred. Poppycock! This is totally un-pagan, and no Medieval Witch would have done such a thing, as this would have been incriminating evidence. The fact that not a single one has ever been found is surely proof of this. Of course, if you want to write a sort of mission statement for your coven, then that’s fine; and it’s perfectly safe these days to keep a Witchcraft diary.
Spell books. A Witch is supposed to be able to remember spells, but I never can. You might learn spells that you never use, but it’s always good to have them handy, just in case. Witchcraft is no longer illegal, and even if it was, you could claim to be collecting spells for research purposes (there’s a lot of Witches today who still haven’t come out of the closet for fear of persecution), so keep a spell book.
On the subject of Grimmoirs, I am unconventional. Some recommend The Key of Solomon, whilst others say Aradia is a must. As far as I’m concerned, the only must in a Witches library is the Observers Book of Wild Flowers. Really, I used to carry a copy everywhere I went, it’s invaluable. There is no use in knowing the significance of Wolf’s-bane, or what Hyssop is used for, if you don’t know what it looks like. They don’t teach botany in schools, and it isn’t something your grandparents are likely to teach you anymore; but the Observers books are very good, and are a handy pocket size. I’d also recommend the Observers Book of Mushrooms, and the Observers Book of Trees. Another useful book that keeps being reprinted is David Conway’s Magic - An Occult Primer. It’s one of the most useful books I’ve read.
Tools to represent the four stations (Earth, Air, Fire, and Water - pertaining to the four compass points) are the prime tools, but there are also others - some affectations, but some very useful. A mortar and pestle has no symbolic purpose, but is a very practical tool for mixing and crushing herbs and such.
Most modern Witches would never even dream of not owning a set of Tarot cards. Whether or not they were ever traditional (Druids relied on their memory alone) is open to question, but they are a useful tool, and a lot deeper than just a set of fortune telling cards. They aren’t cheap ( a good set might cost as much as a computer game), but are worth it. You rarely see them at rummage sales or car-boot sales, but it’s bad luck to use second hand ones anyway. That’s not just a line, it’s true - Tarot cards are very powerful, and not to be taken lightly; it’s very important to choose a pack you like. Fortunately, there’s a lot of choice these days, so it’s easy to find a design that appeals to you. There wasn’t much choice when I started out, and my first pack had a malignant life of their own. If you can’t afford a pack, drop a few hints around Xmas time.
Oh yeah, on the subject of Xmas; has anyone ever said “If you’re a Witch you shouldn’t celebrate Xmas, coz you’re not a Christian?” I used to get it all the time, but Xmas has nothing to do with the birth of Christ (most experts think he was born around June), but is a renamed festival of Pagan origin (Bacchanalia). Yule is a Pagan festival too; in fact, most Pagans celebrated around Midwinter, and there are some people who claim that Santa Claus was in fact, a shaman, not a Catholic priest. In short, Xmas is a Pagan festival.
Whether the red cord (or girdle) is truly an old tradition, or a modern invention is irrelevant - it’s very useful. According to some Witches, it is an important symbolic umbilical cord to be used to bind a coven together, or to join their magical forces in rituals. When not in use, it is worn around the waist, like a belt, but it has one very good use that should not be underestimated. With one end attached to a pivot point, and the other to a piece of chalk or stick, you can use it as a compass to draw a large circle. All rituals should be performed within a circle for protection. Honestly, magic rituals (or even meditation) can leave you spiritually open and vulnerable, but a protective circle can go a long way to make you safe. Theories as to how long the cord should be vary - it all depends on how big a circle you want - but remember you have to wrap it around your waist and wear it all the time, so don’t have it too long, or too thick. Three or four foot of nylon curtain cord from a haberdashers will do fine.
Talismans, such as Egyptian Ankhs, witch Bags, Native American Dream-catchers etc, are optional. They may be affectations, but they do give psychological support (and therefore psychic strength) at the very least, and can be powerful sometimes. They also help to define who and what you are, which is important for a teenage Witch, and they do work. A Witch bag is a very old tradition - a leather bag (traditionally made of crane skin, but leather or even velvet will do) with a few personal items in. usually, they contain a birthstone, a protective herb, and maybe a small charm, and often has a feather attached. They can be worn around the neck, or attached to a belt or girdle. The size varies, according to what you want in it, or how often you will put new things in.
The Witch’s pointy hat (like the pointy shoes) are not widely used these days. There is disagreement about whether it should have one point or two, and whether it was really ever worn by Witches anyway. Personally, I find it quite useful, as you can always use it as a bag for collecting herbs, mushrooms, or nuts. In fact, there is all sorts of things that you can stuff in the point of the hat, making it a useful extra pocket, so I’m keen to see it make a comeback.
Finally, there is the traditional Witch’s familiar. I remember a lot of consternation among Witches in the eighties and nineties, because a number of Witches were keeping exotic pets or naturally wild creatures as “familiars”. I used the quotes, because many of these were just pretentious affectations, and a lot of true Witches were unhappy about the cruelty issues of keeping a wild animal in a cage or chained up. This issue is raising it’s head once more, as there is a growing number of children wanting pet owls, in the wake of the Harry Potter phenomenon. Cats and dogs are perfectly good familiars, and just as traditional as owls or bats, and it is illegal to keep some exotic or endangered creatures as pets anyway. I once knew a witch who kept a stone as a familiar - nothing wrong with that. The idea behind a familiar is something to store power - like the wand, so a crystal is just as good.
So there you have it - how to be a teenage Witch. You don’t need special powers, you just need to talk the talk and walk the walk. It is a spiritual path and if that is the path you choose to tread, then you are a Witch. If anyone challenges you to prove you are a Witch by demonstrating your powers, just smile mysteriously at them and say “Maybe I already have.” Then turn away. You’ll be surprised how effective that can be.
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