The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

this past week it has been hell..i have been without net for a few days and cannot wait til wed..i will be back then..yay i cant wait..i miss everyone and knows i will be back wed..thurs at the latest..take care and chilly will return

really doesnt know where to begin for i have alot going on inside me, hurts so bad..i know what i need and who i need it from but the one thing i truly need i dont think i will ever have and that is His heart..i mean i have it now but not as i wish too..how is it One's can worm their way into your heart and soul but you didnt invite them too? that after so many months past the feelings are just as strong as they were at the beginning..but no matter how much you love and give them they stomp on your heart and crush it..play you again and again because you let them?doesnt understand that..then along comes another One whom you do want to be in your heart and you know that One is right for you, may not be in the way but i have always been told the best way to that is friendship..true friendship which i have with this One and i adore Him..my crushed heart is wanting to give Him all it has but..it still is in the Ones hands who hurt you..what tangled webs we weave..shakes my head and leaves here

I ask to be let go from the coven i was in because of things i had on my page that was bashing religion..The only thing that could really be said that way would be my angel flipping the christain sheep off, now that would be considered bashing..To me it is how i feel about hypocritically ppl so i didnt wish to be there after i ask which image was so bad... besides the only ones who talked to me without me talking to them first was Countess and Queen, a couple others did but after i talked to them first.. i am me and my beliefs are mine also and i will not say sorry for liking things i do..isnt hurting anyone and is my choice..so if being in a coven will be like that in each one i dont want a part or one.. i know nothing of a house so i cannot say that nor can i say that all covens are that way..i am sorry if i have said things to upset anyone, i just feel this way..thank you all for listening to me bitch and moan

It is pretty damn sad when one cannot put anything they wish on their page for it is religion bashing..i have had several of those images there for awhile and nothing said but added a few new ones and boom get hit with i am bashing religion..i do not see that nor do they or anyone else knows how i feel inside..i am me and if no-one likes that well i do not know what to say..delete me, block me, whatever else..i know what is expected of me and what i have to do so..will not lose sleep over that anyways..i am sorry if ones dont like my images but to each their own so it goes..i am me cindy, winter, chilly whoever the fuck You wanna call me and i damn loyal and faithful and a good friend but i will not beg no-one else to like me nor be around me..i have feelings too but ppl seem to forget that..shrugs, cries and leaves here for awhile

i just found out that my EX Master From yahoo was hit head on and killed july the10 th coming from His kids ball games..this hit home to me so much..we parted on bad terms due to the fact that i wasnt able to get internet for awhile and He thought i had left Him..that was furthest from the truth..He was the greastest and will always be in my heart and my thoughts..i will miss You Mystery always Your edyn..Why does god take the Ones who desont deserve it? shakes my head and cries..

i dont know what i do but i do something to fuck things up..i cant win for losing so guess i will leave for a few days to let things cool off or whatever it is they need to do..i find ones i can flirt with easily but then something happens..He knows who He is and i wish Him happiness, all i wanted was friendship..and no Cat, isnt one You hold close either..smiles



i am trying to be One's friend and keeps getting blocks thrown in my way..one minute i get these signals on hey lets try then the next a wall is up..what am i to do..now i met Another and sighs, here we go again..will i ever learn?

wow i have so much to say but as usual i dont want to say em cause some may take em the wrong way plus the demonspawns are driving me crazier..i am okay after surgery, stays pretty much drugged up so i wont feel the pain..shrugs, i met this really cool Guy but..not in love, maybe lust haha plus this one who is my friend is available now...LOOK OUT winter on the prowl..lmao. more later when i can think straight..HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH

it's pretty damn sad when you get judged for what you believe in , believing i am a vampire makes me a satanist cause i like some of the images, well perhaps maybe i am leaning towards that but this isnt about that..what my peeve is when family members judged you when they done worse than you ever thought about doing..but with me believing as i do i need to be in a mental hospital..because i live in a fantasy world, this comes from one who tried to kill her self in front of my 5 year old grandson, the same one who is christain but yet kicked us all out 2 days after christmas knowing none had a place to go what got me is my 2 grandbabies having got kicked out of 2 places within 4 days of each other...and one place being their dad's parents, because him and deann my daughter fought to much so they couldnt stay there but yet i am crazy..i could go on and on but will just pissed me off more..and when i see her, i wont say a word will just walk up to her and punch her out...