The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

03:02 Jan 09 2006
Times Read: 644

Temporary bliss has fallen

A deep, dark ditch up ahead

The calm before the storm

The light before you're dead



Just when I thought this would never end

Reality becomes my fears

Yesterday I was smiling

Today I'm down in tears



To them you seem like you're stable

First impressions always lie

You say you'll keep me safe here

But there's no truth in your eyes



When I'm cornered and abandoned

Spit your venom on me

When you come around by random

Scream your obscenities



I am starved and I am bruised

Will to run, I cannot find

If I live, I cannot choose

And I'm running out of time...

02:36 Jan 09 2006
Times Read: 646

Lash me down, bitter sweet haste

Blood so thick, however the taste

We all cry, sun and moon

Scars on the back, thy plea too soon

Cold words, stick it deep

Break me down, the wall to thy keep

Aura and flame, colors that fade

Destruction of soul, love to abade

Jest aloud, cry and sink

Life does drip, it's hard to think

Hits to the face, breaking the glass

Icy to touch, vial gas

Deeds to hide, pain to date

Death to the child, help to late.

02:00 Jan 09 2006
Times Read: 649

Buried in shame

Blistered in pain

Seething deep into my veins



Biting blows hit hard

Bones and skin marred



Tears stain my cheeks

No words to speak

Breathless invasion makes me weak



Fallen to my knees

Eyes shut in fear to see



I pray to be invisible this one time

This one last time

Daddy?
01:50 Jan 09 2006
Times Read: 652

Daddy why are you so mad?

You have that ugly look again.

Did I do something wrong?

Daddy please don’t hit me.

I still have left over bruises.

I promise I’ll never do it.

You are hurting me.

Can’t you see.

Please let up on your grip.

Your holding my arm too tight.

My teacher asked me

why I had a black eye.

Daddy how do I reply?

Do I say I did it in my sleep?

Do I really tell the truth?

Daddy I just don’t understand.

Why can’t you just hit the sand.

My face is getting ugly.

My body is so sore.

Daddy are you done?

Daddy have you quit?

I really wouldn’t know.

Being hooked up in all this equipment.

another suicide note
01:36 Jan 09 2006
Times Read: 654

She’s lying on her bed crying lifeless tears knowing that everything that went wrong was her fault thinking…



There’s no reason for living…

There’s no point to this life…



This girl’s pain bleeds through her eyes and her life is in her own deathly hands. Knowing that her life would be over soon she thinks about everything good in her life. All the timeless memories of holding hands and soft kisses, her chest starts to throb as her heart is breaking. The remedy she needed to keep her alive was gone an out the window just like the fading scent of his cologne. His devilish treatment... the truths of hypocrisy…the difference of the truth and the omitted lies, the screaming insults of not being worth anything. She can’t stop thinking, hoping that she can forget about the pain she takes her anger out on herself, cutting inch deep scars that pierce two inches deeper into her heart. Relieving stress on paper writing stories and poems about death and her lost love. The last thing she needs now is the picture of his face in her head.

All at once he rushes thorough the door and into her life again bringing his hatred and abuse. The littlest mistakes leave this poor girl with bruises and a black eye. Knowing in her mind and in her heart to stay alive, he needs to leave. She musters up the courage to scream at him…



“Get out and never come back! This is it! I don’t want you hear anymore!”



His anger won’t subside. Wishing she wouldn’t have said anything she knows that this is the end. This is the final beating. This is his breaking point. He starts swinging and she starts screaming…



“HELP! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP!”



knowing no one will come to her rescue, she starts to fight back. She’s never fought back before because she always wanted him just to love her, but this time its different. Her head and her heart both know that this love of his death is going to make her pain stop. She gets up and runs into the torn down kitchen with the ripped drapery. Tripping over the warped wood floor dwindling her chances of escape. Grabbing the largest, sharpest knife, and with one quick swing she thrusts it into his stomach. He stands there not realizing what just happened. She had gotten revenge.

Their love was gone from the first hit but she still kept all the memories locked up. She walks away from his body lying in a pool of blood, looking at her own blood stained fingers. She starts to cry. Not knowing why she’s feeling this way she takes the knife and one last time cuts her tattered skin to make the pain fade away, and runs into the safest place that she knows of.

She's sitting in the corner of her room with mascara running down her cheeks and a river of crimson red blood bleeding from her lifeless arm. She's given up because of the things he’s said because she believes she deserves nothing more than to rot in a hell that isn’t good enough for the devil because he told her she was a disgrace. He told her she wasn’t good enough and he was the one that drove her to die this horrific death of deaths.

He was the one that she confided in in the beginning, but in the end, made her feel like she was the one doing everything wrong when in reality he was the one throwing their lives away with the drugs, the alcohol, making her feel worthless, the abuse and the hurtful words of slander. As she's sitting in this corner all alone knowing that she has only a few minutes to live all she thinks about is the past an the way she still loves him without being able to understand it. She feels she did him a favor by leaving this world and stopping all his hate because he made her believe she was the reason he was doing these things. This is the only way she believed that she could make him happy was by dieing and ending her life, even though dead, his soul would still linger and haunt her.

As we all look upon her dead body in the morning knowing she died from a broken heart and her life was lived no much more than a slave girls life… she died for a man no worthy of a name in a story. She bleeds her last drop of blood and she made her pain stop and what she believed as another’s pain. He did this and he is the one that deserved nothing more than to rot in hell for the things he made her believe about herself. This man is merely a beast, showing what makes this world a world of hatred and helplessness towards those who believe they have nothing to live for. The pulsating suicide of this young child who had brought herself to die is because of a nameless man. He was her happiness and he became her death. Danielle’s broken heart will never mend. It’s gone forever along with her beautiful name.

let me die
20:25 Jan 08 2006
Times Read: 661

When I close my eyes

I dream of the perfect life

But when I open them I realize nothings right

Fuck everyone,

Fuck you,

Fuck them,

Fuck me

I hate me for who I am

Shoot me in the head

Just let me get it over with

Now

I’m breaking I just can’t take it anymore

I’m ready to lock myself in the bathroom and start cutting myself once again

I want to watch myself bleed, for that second of relief

I’m braking

I’m done

I want to die

Please I want to go now

I want to shoot myself

Please just let me die

Bye

let it bleed
20:22 Jan 08 2006
Times Read: 662

wounds cut open

seen from shore to shore

don't eveen try locking your door

let it bleed

can see you from the mountain tops

i want more and more

let it bleed

stiff craking neck

blood shot eyes

i can hear you screaming

you run naked through the night

let it bleed

painfully excruciating

but still i can see

visions of the past stalking me

stop the mocking faces

stop the empty lies

the truth is all that's wanted

one thing never seen in your eyes

let it bleed

slowly you're lost

surely you're gone

i rejoice in laughter

the bleeding is gone

20:21 Jan 08 2006
Times Read: 663

Another bad day always ends in the same old way,

crimson rivers streaming down my arm,

cluching this knife to do me harm.



Pierce my skin and drag the razor sharp blade accross my flesh,

tears freezing on my chin as a result of my deadly stone cold breath.



Hanging on by my finger tips.

"you have everything" they say as i gase at their lips.



Why don't they understand?

I thought out of all the people, they would understand that sometimes everything isn't enough.

Everything means nothing.

Pushing me and pushing me, why can't hey see?

they are the ones driving me to the deep dark sea!

knowing thats where i have to go to release my sweet soul,

as i know the inside of my heart has gone cold.

04:41 Jan 07 2006
Times Read: 672




You looked too good

And right then

With moonlight all streaming

The windows too clouded

With steam and moments

Nothing in the longest of times

Has felt this right



Did you miss who woke up

On the other side of that bed?

With clutter

Flowers

And clothes making a little island

Deserted save two



Maybe I just want to grab ahold

And never fucking let go

Maybe I'm addicted

Just like you

To all the pain

Little roses and dreams

A thorn for each memory

With 'once upon a time'

Stuck like glue

To lips painted rage red



If you asked me nicely though

I'd be happy to replace

All the things that make you hate

The things bumping in your night

With a few extra scratches

Another set of broken nails

Left stuck and embeded

In a back burning

With those red lines



If I asked nicely

Would you replace that bottle?

Let me drink you

Instead of a shot for each year



Because I think you look

A fuckload better

Than a dirty shotglass

Filled to the brim

Of another dozen reasons

To feel so fucking wrong



I'll swap you heart ache

If you'd think it would help

I'd slay demons

Men

And memories

For just one night

Of restfull sleep

If you think you'd sleep it



You just look so good

When you're sitting there

So far away and hiding

With my eyes roaming

Over curves

Smiles

And rough little kisses



And you looked better still

With your head resting prestine

On the crook of my arm

Eyelashes soft to cheek

As you set to fly

Through dreams

My suicide note
04:37 Jan 07 2006
Times Read: 673

This starts off with a girl like me and you.

And everytime she had a problem, I know what she would do.



She was an average girl with friends that cared.

But little did anyone know, her parents were never there.



She would sit in her room and cry herself to sleep.

Thinking of the mom who always saw her get beat.



She never knew what it was like to be loved.

Sometimes she would tell her friends all she wants is a hug.



She couldn't take anymore of this life.

Espically after the last big fight.



She wrote a letter telling everyone goodbye.

And telling how her life was just one big lie.



Sread it again and again and started to cry.

Because she knew this was her final goodbye.



She signed he name and folded the note.

Then looked at the blank cover and wrote.



With this letter I end all of the fights.

And now that I'm gone I can spread my wings and take flight.



You know I love you all and please don't cry.

But as I look back on my like I really think I need to die.



The end is near, so take care.

And remember I'll always be there.

04:36 Jan 07 2006
Times Read: 674

I try to help.

i look in your eyes.

i cant get past, all your lies.

I need help but no-one understands.

All you do,

you give me your hand.

All im doing here,

staying alive.

Also helping you,

struggling to survive.

You tell me you cut,

I say i do too.

You dont have a reason...

Mine is YOU.

I try to be free,

i also speak out.

But the look I see in your face is doubt.

Im looking back through the past couple years. But theres nothing there.

Only tears.

I thought i wasnt losing you.

I guess I am now.

But all i can do is ask God how?

I look at your wrists,

and i wait for hope.

If i ever lose you,

I'll learn to cope.

I see your eyes,

glazing towards death,

As i help you breathe,

your 1 last BREATH.