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I am so tired of searching for the truth behind what is real and what is fictitious in the world. Everyday I awaken to some new form of hell, but it is only a hell to me because the way my mind works. I am a socialized creature and yet everyone tells me I need more people in my life. Shit like I need another hole in my head. Backstabbers, betrayers, liars and idiots, my close circle of friends.



I gave up my old life and to become something much better than I was, and where did this all leave me, to myself. My online friends are the only ones who seem to have a brain in their heads. It's a shame too most of them I would love to sit down for tea or coffee with and have an intelligent conversation with that doesn't begin with my boy/girlfriend did this. I know this sounds like the rant of the century well fuck it is!



How do you express to those around you how you feel without them getting ass hurt, simply put you can't because if you're an empath like me it washes over you when they feel anything. Now with everything else going on in my life my abilities have increased. I can't shut it down like I use to because of a certain medication I'm on. They think I have bipolar disorder, it's not true but I will keep letting them feed me pills until someone out there realizes that, I am feeding off other peoples emotions in a bad way.



My reality is clear, I am in no way without sanity. I see things only a few people see, which in everything past present and future. Trust me mankinds future is not a pretty sight you guys fuck us over big time. Now to clarify things a bit I am not saying that my own humanity is not present. I am human with all the flaws and every screwed up tendency, save a few a fell the worlds pain. My Grand mother explained it to me as having the Shamans life. You feel everything, and there is no way to block it or ignore it you anger the ancestors that hand you a great helping of pain.