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martin's Journal


martin's Journal

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afternoon at dads

09:53 Oct 25 2009
Times Read: 722


so i,m walkin up the hill towards my dads grave and it's been raining, so it's " squish - squish " all the way up there. i get there and i got nothin to say. yep my dad has still got it. that " it " i'm talkin about is the ability to make me feel understood and not alone without needing any stupid words to discribe what we bolth already know without them.

it sure is peaceful up there. i remember when my dad first died and i was still on the lam from the law. they never looked for me at the cemetary. i was up there all the time back then. maybe that was like a neutral zone or something.....or maybe i wasn't as important as i thought to them.

i don't take flowers up there. i never got my dad flowers when he was livin so that would feel funny. i usually bring news of what's been happening, or bounce my problems off him, ...or...stand there in silence for a while as the winds blow around me, then say " dad, i have nothin good to say so i'll say goodbye till next time.......i love you "

then i walk down the hill to my car " squish - squish and continue this mission i call life.


COMMENTS

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martin
martin
16:10 Oct 25 2009

hmmm, i bury a soriety coin at my dads headstone every year on my clean date. i sure hope some asshole with a metal detector don't go up there some day and collect them coins........i imagine there would be a special kind of bad carma for that kinda shit.








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