Aunt Millie07:43 May 08 2009
Times Read: 769
My mother said the other day, "She was the baby, she wasn't supposed to go first." Life, I believe, sometimes has a cruel way of reminding us it isn't fair.
This is an email sent out by my Aunt Sue, my mother's oldest sister. In it I think she summed up how all of us in the family feel.
"My little sister, Mildred Elaine was named after two beloved aunts.....My mother's Aunt Millie and our generation's Elaine. The names were well chosen as Millie was loved by her nieces and nephews and all the "kids" she took in under her roof to whom she was an aunt, a mother, and a friend.
Our Millie died Thursday morning. She left us shaking our heads and wondering why...not why she died...her body couldn't handle the substances with which she tried to nourish her soul. We wondered why she turned to alcohol for relief. We saw her as a gifted, intelligent loving woman...she did not...and it killed her.
There is a "Sarah Jo" wall in Millie's house...filled with pictures...Sarah's biography in frames. There has never been a daughter more cherished than our Sarah Jo...and it shows. Sarah is a bright, funny, well rounded human being, grounded in herself and capable of doing anything she sets her mind to...a legacy from her mother.
Millie had a varied career. She was a gifted student and after returning from Denmark and graduating from highschool, she met and married Jack...things happened....the rain that is apt to fall in anyone's life, and Millie and Sara Jo became a family of two...and a team...Millie the coach and Sarah the star player. Millie worked as a chef in a wonderful Grant's Pass restaurant. I used the term "chef" on purpose, although not formally schooled, she earned the title by hard work and good reputation. (Not to mention the fact that she made a mean Greek Salad). She worked at the Grant's Pass Boys and Girls Club and put herself through college....then, after a little more rain...she moved to Alaska, first to Whittier,then to Anchorage. She did restaurant work again for a while and then went to work for Lang and Associates, Surveyors. She put on hip boots and tromped through the tundra holding the "stick"...she worked in the office using a CAD program...her last project was a survey for a local church. Her employers will miss her...she really could and would do it all.
Our mother and father knew she could. She was the child of their later years...the baby of the family and a fun kid. Crackerjack cribbage player also. Our parents never let us "win" a game...they never threw one so we'd feel good. We had to work to win and loose gracefully. (None of us have mastered the last part) I believe of all of us Millie probably came the closest to beating Dad at cards...and that is a great achievement. They loved her and she loved them...that's a blessing.
She was my kid sister and she wasn't supposed to die before me. She wasn't supposed to die before our Mother. But she did and she leaves us sad, bewildered and a little angry...not at her but undirected anger at the unfairness of life...but who said life is always fair? Not I. Sometimes it sucks and this is one of those times. For myself, I want to honor her life by staying closer to my family...I don't want months to go by without saying "Hi, whatcha doin?"
Hopefully, it's not "A lesson too late for the learnin'"
The night before she died she was planting flowers. I love that word picture, she was planting flowers...that's my vision of my sister...that's who I'll talk to in my head as I grieve her...Millie planting flowers.
I don't know if Millie believed in God but the God of my faith would welcome her gentle loving spirit with open arms and then put her to work planting tulips.
Rest in peace, Millie...at last."
COMMENTS
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sahahria
23:37 May 27 2009
WooHOO! :D Can't wait to see you again :D
birra
18:17 May 28 2009
It's going to be a crazy summer!