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estherofhell's Journal


estherofhell's Journal

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2 entries this month
 

18:44 Jan 21 2009
Times Read: 597


not sure any more



should i stay or should i go



you seem to think you love me



but i think you still love her



stop telling me im better than her



better than any of them



stop telling me that no ones ever made you feel like i do



stop telling me that "im the one"



stop telling me that "im perfect"



stop singing love songs to me



stop doing all these romantic things



their not for me



their for her



youre trying to cover her memory with me



but it wont work



shell always be there



because she almost gave you something i wont give you



because she willing gave you her everything



because im not her



because ill never be her



because ill never try to be like her



because im not willing to be her shadow



because im not willing to replace her



im not willing to cover all the scars she gave you



im not complete like she is



im brocken i kow it



i wont ever be like her



i dont want to be like her



i dont want to criticize you



dont want to shove you down and leave you down



im not her



realize this



im not her and i dont want to be her



she and me arent the same



were different people



so stop everything



unless youre completely sure



youre ready to leave her behind



until then ill never believe the words you say



the things you do



ill never believe in you


COMMENTS

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09:25 Jan 21 2009
Times Read: 604


know youre not over her

not sure if you ever will be



im not like her



im not her



dont compare me to her



were not the same her and me



because unlike her even though you fuck up i wont leave you on the ground for you to pull your self up



i want to help you

ill be with you at your side

step by step

helping you walk back from that hell



i love the way you are

because you always stand straight and tall after theyve all done their best to pull you down



i know you still feel for her

even though you dont want to admit it

i know you still want her



im not her

im not going to pretend to be her

dont tell me all these pretty words cuz i know you dont mean them



dont tell me i make you feel amazing

that you love me

that in in me you find happiness



cuz i know you dont

you want her



trust me i know



it hurts but its the truth



and i wont be with you

if it mean being her shadow



chose do you really want her

or are you willing to leave her behind

and really try to see me



those pretty little romantic songs you sing arent for me theyre all for her



you say you dont know why you love that song that talks of heartbreak, betrayal and pain

of her turning her back on you when you gave her everything you could



do you really think im so stupid that i wont realize you still want her



who are you trying to fool



cuz it defenetly isnt me



i see it



i hear it



i feel it



you still want her



and i wont compete with her



im not her



dont compare me to her



i wont shove you down



ill help you up



but im not foolish enough yet

to stay where im not the one desired



dont tell me these pretty little words

dont sing me youre love songs

dont tell me you love me

dont tell me you want me

dont hold me like you actually want me care about me



i know its her you want



know its her youll end up with



wont compete with her



you want her



not me



im just the substitute until she gets back



dont lie to me



i know



trust me i know


COMMENTS

-



beautifulmistake
beautifulmistake
11:43 Jan 21 2009

love it...........you always know when they are lieing...thanks for sharing! BM








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