I sometimes wonder. I wonder if I'm truly such a bad person. I honestly try and treat everyone the way I would wish to be treated myself. I would not go out of my way to hurt anyone. But yet I seam to have punch bag wrote on my heart. I'm starting to think that I'm treated this way because I deserve it. That maybe in a past life or something I was a complete f**king ass. Maybe I attract the people who are meant to be in my life. Idk maybe I'm just totally to emotional and should not take things to heart. One thing I do know is I wont change for anyone except myself. There is that old saying something about we accept the love we deserve so maybe everything works like that. mm I wonder.
To those people that make me laugh and smile: I COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU!
I think this is the first time in a while that I have gotten my legs out. And can we say totally need a tan omg so white. Need to get them out in the sun more often..lmao. May the hot weather keep going for all off summer but this is Scotland and it wont last.. or maybe just maybe it will. Lmao. :) You can't beat a beautiful clear blue sky with the sun and heat hitting.
So i spent today down the park with old friend's. Friend's who i have not spent time with in almost 5 year's. It was a good day and i enjoyed it. But i'm not the same person i was 5 years ago and i guess and neither are they. I don't know but i was a bit shy and never said much.. I stayed for one drink with them and then i left, not only becuase i don't drink very offen but becuase i felt like the odd one out i guess. Idk maybe its all in my head and i just need to get out there more often only time will tell i guess.
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