The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I have always dreamnt in color and remembered my dreams. Many of my dreams are very real, some are premonitions of things to come and past events. I do believe that I am alot older than my true age is. I have also been told that I'm on my last life so make it good, which always amuses me.

My dreams are bothering me though and I will deal with it.

When the waves come in and out it can make you dizzy or your mind swim, many times during confusion its like sitting there just being surrounded by waves and darkness. As the tide goes out a new thought comes in a constant pooling. Does it end i don't think so, even when we die it is a rush of blackness as if we have submerged under the tide for a second then to come back and a brite light has engulfed us just to find out its the lights over head. What an illusion.

My storie is one that is many, i was born and so were all of you. we all exist in many things and lives. I have always lived in vaccant existance and to the best of my abilities. which is tiresome and old, Many things have betrayed me and i have loved many times Including when i gave birth to my four children, That first one was hell all 36 hours of it. and she has been my biggest worry since then. she is here on this site and i love her dear so dont be mean her heart is pure. She was raised to know no bad other than disipline and is kind and loving.

The storie is long and i will return to it soon.

Everything runs in threes they say well im up too ten in one day what is up with that, ever heard of psychotic episode, twilight zone, omg. I never new when I had my heart destroyed on monday that my whole life would go with it. jesus christ (ya right) he supposed to be there well I must have missed the bus that day.



I only wanted true love and hapiness all I get is pain and suffering (which is becoming a norm for me) and this sucks.

I cant even provide for my children, cant afford to go get a job ,where do I go now, at least I have food for them me im dying inside and out .



Im hungry in many ways and I am just wasting away. I feel death stalking me and I truely welcome him if it would make this pain for me end. ( a living hell)