~*~ The Journey~*~05:08 Sep 08 2006
Times Read: 959
The journey wasn't one of length ,but of exhausted tedium.With a grateful and exhausted sigh, I am finally at the secret and well secluded door
of my ancestrial lair. It seemd an virtual eternity since i had last seeked refuge in this place,and its thick covering of dust and decay, baring witness to my long absence. But all was in tact and left exact as the day I left.
Another heavy sigh escapes my lips, as I looked around with eyes familiar. And I knew my first order of business, was to tidy up, not only to clean everything, but to reclaim or discard , the remnants of of my past that now in my
adulthood, I could view objectively, and weigh without the freverant and often misplaced emotion of youth. To finally decide, what in this dark tomb
still held any redeemable value or worth ......
I removed the simple backpack I carried, and tried to settle in .
I found the candles and the lamps, and brought light to the cold darkness.
As the shadows danced the air stifling with dust and age, began to move.
Swirls of dust danced and drifted and resettled gently.The tiny creatures that had taken residence in my absence scurried and flitted into the corners that the light could not reach.I felt thier tiny eyes watching,in curiousity and with baneful insult to my arrogant and uninvited tresspass!
My heart was heavy from the events of the eve before. I could still not only see HIM,but feel HIM! He is my constant haunt! Not unusual, I concluded, because I AM apart of HIM! I felt as stongly as he ,every dark thought and emotion he felt,..... every sorrow , every joy.I experienced it as if it were my own.
The memory of the questioning look in his eyes , as I divulged and stated that for the next few days, I would be absent.. lingered,and haunted.He did not demand any explaination,nor did he question my destination or purpose. But the intensity of his gaze on me bore the question,unasked,and unanswered.
It would not do to try to explain, my reasons were solely my own.. and I knew I could not
count on his blessing,in my endeavor. Had I presented it in the form of favor or a simple
a request, I would have had to submit dutifully to his denial and dismissal,a risk I was not willing to take. THIS was important! .. If only to me.
Something I could no longer elude or evade..or ignore!
There I sat, surrounded by the familar things from my ancient past,the volumes of literature stuffed stacked and scattered everywhere,mute testiment to my voracious search of knowledge and my constant strive for perfection. I found my comfort in them! they were my FRIENDS..
In my lonely centuries of exile,my books offered me,distraction ,entertainment, and quiet refuge from my solitude, they were my constant companions .
I delighted in thier knowledge.There was no question, that if somewhere in time there was knowledge of or issued, the
answer could not be found! Long were the days that I devoured with intensity the written words,wether for my sheer delight in them,or the genuine quest for answers......
My hand touched them gently and with deep affection, brushing away the dust and decay,each as familiar as any family member.
"So good to see you my old friends!" I whispered
to the books!"
I felt the frown form on my face.. my eyes glanced over the archaic volumes, and thier titles
seeking with futility.. knowing full well that the answer I sought,would not be in my books.
Not this time!
The answers I sought would have to be concluded from all my combined knowledge, and experience.. and in THAT alone .
I felt the cold creeping hand of doubt, close slowly around my throat.
by: Shyanne GreyDove
COMMENTS
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ReapKarmah
08:05 Apr 19 2010
"for the next few days, I would be absent.."
The more I read this the more I remember it.
I was so oblivious...it was so obvious
Was it really the best decision?