VioletShadows's Vampire Journal

VioletShadows's Journal

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5 entries this month

Jul 2018 →

Basic
02:43 Apr 19 2018
Times Read: 516

Have you ever wanted something basic
Like the touch of their hand on your face
So you touch your cheek to imagine
It is really their touch in your place

Have you ever needed words of kindness
But were greeted with silence instead
Imagining gentle words spoken
To bandage the new cut that has bled

Have you ever gone days without speaking
Invisible to all living souls
And say to yourself that it's better
Because no one can make you feel whole

Have you ever been secluded so long
That the mere thought of sun hurt your eyes
It's all so foreign beyond your door
And each stranger's thin smile is a guise

Have you ever craved something deep so much
That you couldn't explain it with words
Some repair of shattered illusion
Or unhearing of something you've heard

Have you ever despaired your existence
Wondering why you go on to draw breath
When life has departed another
Someone much less deserving of death

Have you ever just ached for belonging
But found private tears your only salve
Have you felt alone in your suffering
From the absent and basic- I have

COMMENTS

DarkestTemptation
03:50 Apr 19 2018

Very powerful moving piece indeed sad but beautiful. I have too!

AbsintheandBlood
06:32 Apr 19 2018

Each line I read pulled memories I have locked away throughout my life . This is beautiful , you have carefully placed pieces of your life and placed them into words that reach out and touch a soul ... mine

VioletShadows
03:25 Jul 08 2018

Please forgive the delayed response- I've been off a while. Thank you Dark, and Absinthe.

Burning Narcissus
04:46 Apr 16 2018
Times Read: 543

Like every mirror overhead
Reflecting angles of lovers
Every line and curve unfolding

Like every tongue of flame in fire
Dissects air, dividing blackness
Your words unfurling, controlling

Like every glass of wine is raised
But not before its age and time
In marking your marked occasions

Like every prick of blood from pins
Will be used to sign life away
Quicker, if from lacerations

Like every gathering fury
There is a calm force at your core
While madness fells unfortunates

Like every poison potential
A drop decides outcome degrees
Toying with your subordinates

Like every Napoleonic
Brilliant minds exploding ego
Your vantage is your kingdom fair

Like every perception is truth
There's truth that's real and truth tailored
Still bodies accrue in your snare

Like every ascension grows low
One day Everest becomes a hill
Enslaved by your once proud conquests

Like every volcano erupts
Raging order, ruling chaos
Burning Narcissus, in protest

Like every man's imperfection
His ambitious power destroys
Master revealed as Slave in dust

Like every now matured craving
Strains its confines with each feeding
Consumed by the trappings of lust

COMMENTS

SirChaos
05:14 Apr 16 2018

Outstanding poem.

LustyJon
15:06 Apr 16 2018

Nice

Wrath1972
06:53 Apr 18 2018

Love it

VioletShadows
02:36 Apr 19 2018

Thank you Sir, Lusty, and Wrath...nice to hear such lovely feedback. This one is unlike any I've ever written before.

Crumbs Won't Do
19:22 Apr 15 2018
Times Read: 557

I shouldn't have to be vulnerable
Unless you make it safe
I shouldn't have to show my hand
Unless you play fair
I shouldn't have to pull back my affection
Because yours isn't guaranteed
I shouldn't have to be so open
Yet still wonder if you care

The truth of Me is there to read
It's in a language of the heart
The truth of You was there to see
It's just I viewed from a different angle
The truth of Us is unresolved
It's just I wanted it so badly
The truth of it, a challenge
It's just I longed so to untangle

And I allowed for your inexperience
So I tried to give patience
And I allowed for your blindness
So I tried to make it clear
And I allowed for your many failings
So I tried to fill the gaps
And I allowed for your shy demeanor
So I tried to silence my fear

I thought if I gave you the space
You would surely draw closer
I thought if I could give you my trust
You would surely not return something hollow
I thought if I gave you the match
You would surely give me warmth
I thought if I gave you words with depth
You would surely desire to follow

For Love cannot be called 'like'
Because you diminish the strong with the careful
For 'Cherished' cannot go unproven
Because lacking action will make it untrue
For Lovers are more than intimate 'Friends'
Because a body shared, includes the core of a heart
For unselfish giving requires a return
Because to the starving, crumbs won't do

COMMENTS

ShipWreck
23:02 Apr 15 2018

I knew someone who went through this exact situation with another. The only way she thought it could have been solved was to leave. Althought she tried to make things peaceful and smooth it wasnt good enough for him. He wanted and expected too much from her and it drained her completely. He was toxic and very inexperienced but now she is with a good man that I hope treats her well. I hope you arent going through this situation. If so feel free to vent in my inbox anytime there is always room for me to help someone in need.

VioletShadows
04:50 Apr 16 2018

I wrote from experience. Too often kind people are not only put through always giving and not getting in return. Then insult is added to injury by having to endure further pain by being the one to walk away. Thank you for the kind offer.

DarkestTemptation
04:56 Apr 16 2018

What a very beautiful poem indeed I love it bravo.

Wrath1972
06:55 Apr 18 2018

Many of us are or have been in the same situation. Walking away is hard and scary, but ultimately the only option if you want to find true happiness.

VioletShadows
02:38 Apr 19 2018

Thank you Temptation and Wrath. Thank you for taking time to read and comment. Ah sweet Wrath, it doesn't surprise me such a sensitive soul would know these feelings. (hugs)

VioletShadows
03:26 Jul 08 2018

Darling Dark....so sorry I left you out! I just noticed! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment. You're lovely.

Secrets I'll Never Tell
05:09 Apr 09 2018
Times Read: 619

There are secrets I'll never tell
Of how I became as I am
There are stories I keep inside
Cataloged, but where I'll not tell

There are secrets I'll never tell
Of how hearts can't solve equations
They can't relate to numbered age
Or state the degree that I fell

There are secrets I'll never tell
If you one day were there, then weren't
How my soul would be sick, wither
Of how it might never grow well

There are secrets I'll never tell
Of fearing more than I'll admit
Chance is the void of a chasm
And so I create my own cell

There are secrets I'll never tell
What it is to be taught to crawl
To subsist on crumbs of false hope
Few inches above your own hell

There are secrets I'll never tell
I long for a word or a breath
Curve of your mouth, transfixing me
Pushing up from your chest's full swell

There are secrets I'll never tell
Fearing worse than what I know now
For to gain the thing I desire most
My own soul I gladly would sell

There are secrets I'll never tell
Of a heart engulfed in red flames
Someone barely knows I exist
So silence is what I compel

There are secrets I'll never tell
At least you will call me a friend
The dice I'll not hold and not cast
There are secrets I'll never tell

COMMENTS

LORDMOGY
08:45 Apr 09 2018

Nice!

DarkestTemptation
15:30 Apr 09 2018

This is a beautiful and wonderful piece indeed thank you for sharing it with us.

VioletShadows
16:12 Apr 09 2018

Thanks to you both for taking time to read and comment! How nice!

DarvyOWolf
04:27 Apr 13 2018

i could see this play out in my mind's eye
nicely done

Wrath1972
06:57 Apr 18 2018

It sounds like you have been through a lot. I hope your life is happier now.

Adriatic
04:48 Apr 09 2018
Times Read: 625

I follow you down to your depths
Through eyes of Adriatic sea
What's buried in those depths below
In your diluted history?

Unnamed and scattered memories
Obscured by sand-strewn floor
Better hidden there in silence
Than washed in view upon your shore

If I ignored all of the warnings
The storm clouds above the water
Would I reach those watery depths
Or become part of its fodder?

Have some others gone before me?
Have they lived past the murky dark?
Or proven unequal, unworthy
Unsuccessful, but leaving their mark?

Perhaps there is no buried treasure
Just skeletons decomposing
But I swear not to look away
From what's chained below what's floating

When I look up to the surface
Where sun glints off the breaking waves
You will see I can bear the depths
Not just your shores in light of day

Though never having descended
So far from Safety's field of view
Let me rest in your cold, dense waters
And sink to the bottom with you