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I feel lost.

this month has sucked big time. 1st Travis and Dave go on the ship for three weeks then we get kicked out , Mike and Lady Ashlee go back to there mothers. Lady Jay has to fight with her father to get him to let her stay and she is pregnet. so I feel more like shit that I can't take care of her better. I go to my kidds house ( that shit sucks cause I can't make get calls there, or have my cell phone on. I put everything we have in storeage. Then Lady Ashlees father past's away. and she is getting shit from her mother.

then my bank account is over drawn by 733.52$ trying to pay all the bills Travis was saying he sent money to help me out with our bills but I never got it. Trying to look for a new place .

Lady Ashlee saying she is not moving back in with us.Fighting with my kidds mom.I pull out on the law for trying to take my car cause Travis took out a loan on my car.( I must be fucking gone in the head I pulled out a shot gun on the law) anyway I still have my car the one good thing that has happened in this fucking dark ass time. then the thing that hurts like hell .........

Lady Jays fucking dad kicks her out so we stay at a hotell the money runs out now she has nowere to go so I tell her to go back home to her moms up north ( Now she is having my baby and we wanted to go threw this together) well she is gone till we find a new place but her mother said she can come home ...BUT if she dose she has to stay to after the baby is born..

Janice is like my best friend and now she is gone...my Fucking family is all over I know we we will be back togeter soon but it is now that I need them.(AND THEN MY CELL GETS CUT OFF WTF) Lady Ashlee is a big help is my other best friend her and my kidds mother hate eachother to no end well last night my kidds and there mother came to my job and Lady Ashlee came by ( WHEN WILL THIS FUCKING BULL SHIT END?) Ashlee did nothing wrong well Evelyn told me to get my shit and get the fuck out so here I am Lost.

The last few days have been hard on the family but we will get past this

we are strong and have much love for each other

I miss my family its hard to try and sleep without them i miss getting up and seeing them drinking with them. fighting chilling looking at movies playing games the hole 9. sorry I let yous down

For the first time in a long time I feel lost.

We where kicked out of our house, We had to go our own ways till we find a new place.

I Feel like I let my family down I should have seen it coming...Maybe I am not as strong as they think I am. I feel like shit that I chould not save our home. I miss you all I know we will be back together soon but till then I am lost without you all. Mradu Mike...have faith we will be back together soon my family. I love you all and miss you.

Your Brother Ryu Noctem Aeternus



P.S.

I am So Sorry I Let You Down.