Well Grandpa went for his monthly check up and treatment yesterday. The tests they did the last time have come back showing NO CANCER!!! at this time. Which is fantastic!!! He is doing better and getting a bit more optimistic that he will be able to live to 128 as he had always planned. :-)
Every day is a blessing for him.
I was so excited to talk to him today about it. He sounds so chipper. Its a good sign. He says he hopes he can stop his treatments soon......but, I told him he might have to just keep doing them .....kinda like an oil change every 3000 miles. :-)
Whew.......I love that man so much!!
Went to the country on Sunday. My Grandfathers birthday was March 21st and we all had called and some went out and spent time with him. Then April 6 was my Grandmas birthday.....we all called and talked to her. My Grandfather got very upset ...... and pissed. He said everyone had forgotten his birthday but remembered hers. Fact is his memory is slipping a bit. He was very hurt and upset......kinda got nasty with grandma. So this weekend we got another cake and went out to see him again. *smiles* Who cares.......he can have a birthday every weekend for the rest of his life if he wants *smiles* I will be more than happy to buy a cake and celebrate it every weekend.
He was very happy to see every one. I think he had a good day.
Once everyone went out side or left we got some time alone. I love being with him. His aura is just so awesome and seems brighter even though I know we are on the down hill side of life. We didn't talk about anything important, we just chit chatted...and I got him all wound up about some business things. He and I were sitting next to each other fussing at one another and grandma just rolled her eyes and stayed out of it. I had to laugh cuz I noticed that we both do very similar things when we feel we are right ......lol
He would pound his fist on the table and make his point and I would smack my hand down right after him and go right back with my point. *laughs hard* I love getting his blood flowing like that. I have done it all my life. I will just take a different side to argue with him.......just because ......I can.
None of the family would dare tell him hes wrong even if he was.......and when I get in it....they all stand back or run and hide.....lol.......cuz I am not afraid to tell him how it is.....and if hes wrong....damn it hes wrong and I will tell him so ......with the utmost respect of course.
Looking back over Sunday.....I know Grandpa will always be with me. He's part of me....many of the family say I am just like him...and I saw it Sunday.
I love him so much it hurts but, I am getting better with the facts.
By the way, Wed. he went in and they drained off 2 liters of fluid from just one lung. IF the cancer doesnt kill him first he will drown.
I only pray that he goes in his sleep.
.......well we will see.......
I have had my van in the shop three times now and each time they said they fixed the problem and each time it jacked up again but today they actaully found something that might be it.
Ok.....so I just want to crawl under my covers and cry. But what good would that do?.......nothing. It won't fix the car, it won't make my grandfather better, it won't make my ex be a bit nicer to our oldest son, it won't make my knee better..........grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
If its not one thing its another. I try to keep smiling and dealing with everything that gets thrown my way and so far I am managing very well......so I have been told. But, I just want to cry!!!
I feel like I am in the middle of a boxing ring with a blindfold on and Im taking every punch that comes my way right on the chin.
I am sorry if I sound like I am whinning, I don't want to be doing that.....I just need to vent and get it out someplace.
I guess I should play the lottary......it might make my chances a bit better to win...lol
But money won't fix it all either.....damn .....a vicious circle......I think Im being set up for the knock out.....
Hello journal.....its been a while sorry...
You know my grandfather has been battling cancer. He did his kemo and has been doing the maintenance treatment every three weeks. He seems...to be doing fair. This past week he has been hurting like hell on his left side....they are concerned that he now may have cancer in the left lung....WTF! He is suppose to go today for a cat scan and then wed to have his right lung drained.....but when he gets there on Wed .....if they show that he does have cancer in the left he might tell them all to go fuck themselfs and they don't know what they are doing. I am trying to stay possitive but I am also expecting his reaction.......and he will be very pissed......
Guess I will let you know on Wed or Thursday..
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