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It’s been a long time..
Sometimes this is the best place to get out of my head.

Some reason my thoughts are on Josh tonight. He loved this place so much. I find myself here remembering him. He always gave me strength. He saw something in me that I didn’t.

I now suppose in his weak moments, he gave me strength and hid his truth. I guess I was but a passing thought. I still find myself reminded of him, thinking what would he tell me right now. I push forward but I am ever growing tired. The days the just don’t change. I’m curious am I starting to understand his thoughts about life. Am I starting to feel as he did.

I’m so stretched beyond my means. So tired I can not sleep. I’m losing my faith that peace exist. Exhausted does not even describe. Is there a word that reaches further that describes it even more. I’m torn… sleep I hope exist so… maybe paradise awaits there. I hope, if it does then please do not wake me. Let me enjoy the slumber and so I will rejoin you again, the never ending struggles will return.