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Well, it's been a week since I was last on VR, so I thought it would be good to post an update of what's going on with me and life in general. I attended a local community art class and ended up being recruited to teach pastels classes. I've been working on my pencil & charcoals and went ahead and ordered fresh pastel supplies. I haven't been able to work on my art for about 6 years now. My creativity comes and goes in spurts, simply dependent on how my brain is working each day. What can I say? Seizures suck.

The medicines also alters my awareness, just as much as the seizures do. My daughter got me addicted to Sims 4 this week and we've been playing side by side for the last few night until the wee hours of the morning. This has not done me any favors. I ended up having two seizures with abdominal convulsions and yesterday and today...I've had a lot of absence and myoclonic seizures. What's the difference? My worst convulsive seizures affect my bodily functions and will literally wring me out. It's very similar to IBS but I pass out once my brain shuts down the control panel when I hit the pillows in bed.

Absence seizures are perhaps one of the most common types. I check out or as my hubby, John, puts it...I "skip a groove." I also get words mixed up or just can't seem to speak anything less than gobbledygook. At this point, after playing Sims 4, I'd say I've been speaking fluid Sim after every seizure. For instance, my funny for the day: John is still learning to use a game controller and I was helping him by telling him what button to push. I meant to say, "push the X button!" Instead, I said, "push the question mark!" o_O (oh fuck my hot-wired brain)

Myoclonic seizures are also fairly common. I basically drop things, juggle things or throw things. I picked up a spoon to stir my coffee yesterday and it flew across the kitchen instead. It's comical to watch I'm sure. Just don't stand around me when I'm holding a knife. :P I have other types of seizures too. One that most people relate with is that thing you do when you walk into a room and forget what you went in there for. Except in my case, I forget what I was going to do after taking 2 steps across the floor. Instead I stop, start looking around for that "thing" I need and what the fuck IS the THING I'm looking for? My housemate bailed me out a few times by handing me spoons for my coffee.

School started back today for my daughter. 10th grade...my god, how fast the kiddos grow up. My son was supposed to graduate high school this year but was unable to. He was pulled out in January by medical order. He had planned suicide in November of last year but stopped and asked his principal for help. Since that time, he's struggled a lot with his depression and by the new year, his psychiatrist advised me to just pull him out. The stress was just too much. We found out then that he hears voices and has been since he was 9-10 years old. It breaks my heart to think of that. He is currently doing well. He's no longer suicidal but Major Depressive Disorder with Psychosis is not easy to manage. Just like Epilepsy, each person's case and treatment is different. Schizophrenia has not been ruled out but I'm hopeful that the right combination of medications will help him finish his GED and find a career or job that suits him. Between getting my daughter ready for the new school year, working with my son's condition, dealing with my own, it's always an eventful day here.

I'm not complaining though, nor am I looking for sympathy. I'm just sharing my experiences in life, that's all. Everyone has their challenges and though we may not always talk about them on social media, for some people, this is a good outlet to find friends and neighbors that know something of what you are going through yourself. Life is real and I believe it is what you make it. Sometimes it's hard to know which way is up, but each day is a new day and has its own story to tell, just take it one page at a time...don't skip to the end without reading what happens next. :)