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This is my current understanding of what it means to be a vampyre.



I see this as a flaw in the flow of the energy throughout my body, as though there is a drain which runs down into the ground and my chi is continually sucked into this place.



The only way in which I can re-energise myself is either by munching my way through excessive amounts of food (which I metabolise very quickly and fails to satisfy) or through the absorbtion of energy from living beings around me.



This second method has been taking place unconsciously for several years, but upon Becoming (not to be confused with Awakening), I realised that this was occuring and in so doing cut myself off from these immoral feeds (to my mind).



This resulted in my body retaliating viciously and virtually collapsing upon me.

I have since been understanding what it is that I have been doing, turned to this feeding only twice and I can measure the difference significantly.



I can dance for hours without pain when I feed salubriously from a crowd, but upon returning home to rest, the pains begin again quickly.



There are those that feel that blood is a neccessity for vampirism, but although I do feel an attraction to it, it is sexually related and I have yet to let blood for this purpose specifically.



I do however, enjoy biting without blood being drawn, more like scraping across the shoulder and rear of the neck and especially the earlobes.

These things I associate more with tantric connections and I have recently undertaken a...ritual, with another that has shown me and them, another side to sex that requires very little in terms of stimulation of the classic organs.



The reason I post this is to shine a small light upon the path that I seem to be following in the hope that there are others whose lack of education has blinded them, may take notice and begin to think beyond the defined walls of their understanding and in so doing, enjoy the pleasures that reach far beyond mere orgasmic delight.

There are those in our world whose opinion of vampires can never broach beyond a certain point of view.



This is due to their edification at the hands of the schooling systems and societal heirarchies in which they have developed, during childhood and further into adolescence via the ever present influence of the media, through TV and hollywood, resulting in an eventual adult mind incapable of seeing beyond that limited spectrum of opinion and accepted bounds of reality, in which they base their individual understanding of their paradigm of the universe.



I cannot fly, I have not lived for hundreds or thousands of years, though I may have lied on a poll or three about it, just for the sheer hell of it and the chance to amuse those like minds who actually find it funny.



I have no fangs, no canines at all even, I cannot see clearly in the dark, but interestingly, I can see ok with my eyes closed. I can't turn into a wolf or bat or mist or anything other than a different version of me, which is a neat enough trick in itself.



Similarly, I have to drink water and I eat food that everyone else eats, but I haven't tried starving myself to see if I can live without it yet. There is no way that I would run around at night hunting young virgins and I like garlic to be in my food that I would cook these sweet ladies.



So whats with the crucifix? I dont really hold a place in my mind for them, but it's not like I run away. And sunlight- I do get awful sunburn after about an hour anywhere south of where I live, but I am fair skinned and almost always forget my sunblock.



SO, whats the bloody point of this ramble I sense you to be thinking...



Despite all of these things, I beleive that the core concept of vampirism still exists and is a valid dichotomy of life.