I dreamed of your face, your eyes, your laughter ... The way your eyes crinkle when you smile, the chip in your left front tooth, the way your eyes dance - like schizophrenic stormy skies - with your laughter, that contagious full bellied laughter, deep and awkwardly lovely.
It made me so sad.
Why do you have to be dead? It's been almost 21 years, and you're still dead. ::sigh::
Can't sleep ... My brain will eat me ... Can't sleep ... My brain will eat me ...
(Thank you Bart.)
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I so know this :(
HA! Paints a scary picture.
I don't get it.
Seriously brain? That was the worst night we've had in a while.
If it were possible to remove you from my head and give yo a good scrubbing, I would.
Dead children. Bones. My father dying. Nuns. Being knifed (I remember it just fine - why were my innards loony tunes technicolor this time? They're really purpley, stupid brain). The Los's ... Los Alamos and Los Angeles, where so much hell happened. Why relive it, brain? We survived it already. Move. On. I'd love to.
Fuck, at least let me sleep.
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I wish waterbombs and giggling children on you.
And fat lazy cats curling up beside you. And hugs!
Hmmmm I understand...
I was walking across desert hard pan, mid-day, like some kind of idiot. I had a hat, but that means jack.
I kept moving forward, even when I couldn't breathe, because I knew horrible things were behind me and that eventually, I'd get to shelter I could see waaaaaaayyy in the distance.
Have you ever been in the desert? Distances are deceptive.
What was behind me?
I was. Events were. Memories were. These were all chasing me, trying to catch me, to drag me down.
I ran, walked, stumbled, crawled until my shoes were shredded and my feet, knees an hands were raw. It never went to night time, just ... the harsh light of day, of glaring exposure.
Maybe there are things I thought I faced but I haven't. I wonder, from which parts of me do I still run?
Dear brain:
We're going to sleep now, This means - no crazy shit, ok?
Just ... quiet. Be quiet.
Unless it's about scent. hehe. That's allowed, but no telling. :P
Nini, world.
This has got to stop.
I really want decent sleep.
I really want to not have nightmares.
>.>
Fairiemoon ... get the drill? Please?
It's very confusing for the cats (and my brother) to be startled out of their own sleep by a screech.
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Only if you'll threaten my brain too. I'm not going to describe my nightmare to you as I'm sure it will just give your brain more ammunition. Let's just suffice it to say 0900 was not the time I planned on getting up yesterday.
*hugs*
I am awake now, thank you lords and ladies.
I am not asleep, trapped in that recurring mess, thank you all the odd gods of the galaxy.
Who wants coffee?!
Ok, so I make a point to keep as far away from the drama and fuckery as possible. It's just not edifying. I catch enough of it in friends' journals though - that it has infected my mother-living dreams!
I dreamed I had to deliver, via certified, signature required, return receipt post - snarky e-presents to an e-dead e-cooter.
::sigh::
No, not Moonie's joking self. I'd have tackled her and asked for the damn e-chocolate.
o.o Stop. it.
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O.o
Dreaming of Moonie means the dreams aren't that bad. ;P
Moonie wasn't IN it. :(
Reading about drama is like reading a gossip magazine or the daily news.
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