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Yet Another "Update"
06:51 Aug 30 2007
Times Read: 729

For any of those that have been keeping up with my medical situation....

***Disclaimer***



Usually, I tend to keep vulgarities out of my entries because I feel it takes away from my writing abilities. However, I'm giving fair warning to the following. It's not goin to be pretty.



**Thanks...Moving On...**



Good news : Christy and I spoke with a DAV (Disabled American Vetrens) Rep a few days ago of whom informed me that I should not only be getting a higher rating, but that I should and will be getting closer to 100% as opposed to the 10% I'm getting now....YAYNESS...This means more benifits, more money, and NO more need for a job if I so choose.



We also spoke to a Patient Advocate about my case and the mistreatment from my supposed "primary doctor". She seemed to have sympathized with me and we set out a plan to get my primary changed and light a fuckin' fire under the asses of the doctors that are supposed to be fixing my knee instead of playing basketball with my life.



And in other news : In the midst of this arranging, I made a call to the ONE doctor that made sure I didn't fall between the cracks and gave me medicine when he could have gotten in trouble for doing so. He ran the Orthropedist down and revealed the man's...heh...plan and conclusions.



......



The basic rundown : I have no infections that they can find and the only reason to explain the pain I experience EVERY FUCKIN DAY has been somewhat determined my knee and my lower femur is deteriorating. Right now, it's at the stage of about 75 years old....or so. I've said it before, I'll say it again : 20ish yr old physically, 40 yr old mentally, and 80 yr old problematically!!!

What kind of SHIT is that?!?





I'm almost 24, I'll need a total knee replacement within the next 10 years (if I'm lucky)...most likely at least 2 times after that. I'll be dependent upon someone else the rest of my life.....Please don't misinterpret this as a spiral down to depression; I don't get depressed. I'm simply writing this to relieve a little mental pressure.



............................................................................



If you've read this far, my congrats to you. You now know a little bit more about what goes through my mind....



Goodnight all....see you in the morning



*light dims from the center stage and Pixie is going to bed*

G.O.T.H.
20:52 Aug 29 2007
Times Read: 734

So that's what all the fuss is about....



This is going to be really fun

*wicked evil grin*

I'm Convinced
02:40 Aug 29 2007
Times Read: 738

I must occasionally be out of my mind because I have NO IDEA where the hell this came from, but I had it as a comment for someone who has since moved around, leveled up, and updated....







"For all those that have come and gone, for those that remain; you become unique and grow stonger through your experience... *smiles*

Enjoy this place which we call our addiction!"

The meaning behind lyrical inspiration....
00:29 Aug 29 2007
Times Read: 740

"I am a question to the world

Not an answer to the earth

Or a moment

That's held in your arms



And what do you think you'd ever say?

I won't listen anyway

You don't know me

And I'll never be what you want me to be"

(I'm Still Here ~ Goo Goo Dolls)



Love, life, and everything in between...I do have a reason behind the lyrics that make it into my Journal. Though, I'm sure I've never actually devulged this information.



This particular verse/song reminds me that I'm still not quite sure of who I am. It grounds me, rather, and takes me a step back from what's going on in my life for the moment. A person may never really truly know who they are and I can accept those terms...unchanged. I'll lead my soul into the unknown....and be damned determined to learn every step of the way.

Stick around...I just may surprise you ;-)



No matter what happens....I'm still here

A Farewell Goodnight
05:40 Aug 28 2007
Times Read: 743

I'm not usually in the habit of making my journal entries more than...twice a week if "the readers" are lucky; but I have felt....inspired as of late.



Right now, I'm running on fumes, my lady love is passed out on the couch awaiting my touch and whispers, "let's go to bed, Baby."



Yet, I still am compelled by my...compassionate nature to say "goodnight" to a few of those other nightowls lurking about....



Must be the Full Moon, but then again, how many things or events are reasoned to this cause? I love that Moon, I have nothing but respect for her. I may not be a Wiccan, a Vampire, a Warewolf, or whomever else roams through the night, but I know my elements. She may not be the "main four", but when has that made a difference? She's still has her effect on this world and its inhabitants. Doesn't she?







Uh huh.....now I've got you thinking....

Muawhhahahaha

Laughter for the day!!!
01:50 Aug 18 2007
Times Read: 750

Bitten from DarkRoseBlood's journal ^_^

******Popcorn Sex******



OMG this just came to me. When you make popcorn the heat from the microwave or stove goes into the popcorn. Well in the microwave the page unfolds like it's taking it's clothes off, then it pops like every little pop is a moan as the heat goes in the bag and out the popcorn when it pops so it's going in and out of the popcorn.



Damn the popcorn is horny :P

A new start....
08:22 Aug 15 2007
Times Read: 757

Well, they always say blessings come in disguise, right? I tried to pump up my profile since a WONDERFUL PERSON has allowed me to once again have a Premium Membership and I unfornately wiped everything out! Yea, you talk about someone being a bit pissed off. Anysway, I just finished re-doing it, and I honestly think it may look better than it was before.





Yayness!

Losing again....
07:47 Aug 03 2007
Times Read: 765

Ever since the Friday before last...food has not been my favorite sight, light is my enemy, and I have nearly forgotten how to stand or sit up for longer than 5 minutes. And what do the doctors have to say about it?



"Here's some antibiotics, take these and everything else should work itself out"...."No, stop taking those and you won't lose control of you internal organs..."



Crap, it's all freakin' crap....I've been sick, hardly eating, hardly moving for the past two weeks, and that's all they have to say????

Grrrrr



However, today has been a little better...I actually ate real food today, and even better still, in a restaurant. Apparently, though, because of this sickening restraints I've been held into, I've lost 15 lbs. in the process.



I've heard of some crazy diet plans, but damn...I don't need one!!!!!