The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Body: To every guy that regrets hurting or losing her.



To every guy who knows which girl he wants.



To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait."



To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful." (instead of damn you're hot)



To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town (or across the state) to see her.



To every guy who has given her flowers just because its wednesday.



To every guy that said he would die for her.



To every guy that really would.



To every guy that did what she wanted to do.



To every guy that cried in front of her.



To every guy that she cried in front of.



To every guy that holds hands with her.



To every guy that kisses her with meaning.



To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.



To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.



To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.



To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.



To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes.



To every guy that would give his seat up.



To every guy that just wants to cuddle.



To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what.



To every guy who told his secrets to her.



To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.



To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.



To every guy that believed in her dreams.



To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.



To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.



To every guy that walked her to her car.



To every guy that gave his heart.



To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her.

Male and female rats may have sex twenty times a day.

22% of American women aged 20 gave birth while in their teens. In Switzerland and Japan, only 2% did so.

Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. It is 10 times more effective than valium!

For every 'normal' webpage, there are five porn pages.

Sex is biochemically no different from eating large quantities of chocolate.

A man's beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex.

Male bats have the highest rate of homosexuality of any mammal.

The average shelf-life of a latex condom is about two years.

"Formicophilia" is the fetish for having small insects crawl on your genitals. Gross!!

"Ithyphallophobia" is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis.

When swans go on a date, they'll put their heads together. Then they stick together for life.

The word "gymnasium" comes from the Greek word gymnazein which means "to exercise naked."

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course!)

There are men in Guam whose job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the 1st time

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the o

An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum.

In india it is cheaper to have sex with a prostitue than buy a condom!

Sex burns 360 calories per hour

Women who read romance novels have sex twice as often as those who don't.

The average person spends 2 weeks of its life kissing.

The Ramses brand condom is named after the great phaoroh Ramses II who fathered over 160 children.

Males, on average, think about sex every 7 seconds.

The greatest recorded number of children one mother had was 69 children. Do the math!

The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were: Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

25% of women think money makes a man sexier.

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

Turkeys can reproduce without having sex. It's called parthenogenesis.

Each day, there are over 120 million sexual intercourse taking place all over the world.

Snakes have two sex organs.

A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

Donald Duck comics were once banned from Finland because Donald doesn't wear pants.

85% of men who die of heartattacks during intercourse, are found to have been cheating on their wives.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.



I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.



I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a BITCH!



I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.



I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.



I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.



I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.



I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.



I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.



I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.



I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.



I have BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.



I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.



I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO.



I'm a VIRGIN so i MUST be prude.



I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.



I'm BI so I MUST think every girl i see is hot.



I'm christian so I MUST hate homosexuals.



**************************************



I'm ASIAN so I MUST have a small penis.



I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.



I'm ASIAN so i must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.



I'm a PROSTITUTE so I MUST have crabs.



I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.



I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent.



I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.



I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.



I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.



I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.



I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.



I'm a STONER so i MUST be going in the wrong direction.



I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.



I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.



I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.



I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.



I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.



I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be bulimic.



I'm BLACK so I MUST carry a gun.



I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.



I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart.



I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.



I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.



I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.



I'm Muslim, so I MUST be a TERRORIST!!!!!



I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.



I'm EGYPTIAN, so I MUST be a wanna be black.



I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.



I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST be "evil" and not have any morals.



I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.



I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.



I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.



I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.



I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.



I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.



I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.



I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.



I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...



I like to DANCE, So i must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore



I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.



I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.



I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.



I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz



I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.



I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.



I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.



I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.



I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.



I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.



I'm ITALIAN, so I must like guys with big cocks!



I'm IRANIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!



I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.



I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.



I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.



I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.