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I walked into velvet acid Christ bursting through 3k speakers coming from different sides of the club while hoping to listen to closely related music as promised on the flyer which naturally turned out different!

I quickly made my way through the smoke, generated from the machine, right across the stage which led to the restrooms which is always my first destination point before actually noticing what’s happening around me!



After expressing my vanity in the mirror for a few minutes, I headed back to the bar...



Few girls occupied the dance floor with some un timed wiggly dancing which is more then I can say about the two guys head banging behind them.

Two girls in particular held my interest. One of them was a tall pouty woman in plain black stilettos, messed up short blonde hair and fishnet stockings just beneath a short silk skirt.

She’s what a typical kind hearted Barbie gone bad would look like which is everything an everyday Joe desires. Being one of the only people here which knows a couple of things about EBM helped our previous relationship though it didn’t work out due to her insecurities, paranoia and emotional little buggers which she used to sprout during what she defined as romantic phases!

The other gal had the whole ‘evil-seductive-look’ which seemed to work for her while covered in a long black dress and sexy pikes which go with her white strips in her straight long black hair! Its fare to say that she’s the total opposite of Eden- the Garden of delights or at least she acts as if she is!



A finger pokes me from behind, turning to find a short burnout little midget who looked like a fun house mirror version of Paul Trent! I looked at him as polite as possible under such circumstances and he didn’t even mutter a peep. Looking at him as he stares at me while smiling made me uneasy and wonder if he’s a mute who’s checking out if my may-cup is in order or just thinking about molesting me..!

Either way I didn’t wanna find out so I sneaked away trying not to attract any attention from a chubby creature that looked like he could be the next Charles Manson…



Suicide commando were in the mix and dancing to them was a must…While shaking my bootay in the midst of the song I notice that the ‘ I’m-so-evil-I-shit-demons-and-bats’ girl was in front of me and something just made me back off to a corner were I could look all innocent in!!

We all have someone whom we never totally got over and destiny choose her for me which explains why I would like to meet destiny and question its motives!



Something flashes and I started recalling on those relationship months with her…through my head, memories Building up to the big picture were I totally fucked her all up which made her go berserk, straight onto a vendetta mission which explains why she tried to ruin everything for me. But the fact that I’m still standing and never crippled myself down to her level of immaturity is some sort of consolation!

Besides it’s good to know that you have affected someone’s life. Wheater it means long nights of trying out curses or neglecting peace at mind on her behalf is nothing which I seem to wanna bother thinking about!



Music had changed and just as I felt like dancing again they swapped it with some indescribable shit to suit the fashion show that took place on stage!

The clothes that they were wearing were totally boring and the models weren’t so great looking either! They got me thinking about a quote from ‘Ms. Congeniality ‘stating that Dennis Rodman looked better in a dress! Looking at those girls made me understand even more why guys turn gay!



Matters got worse just as an annoying monstrous male approached me. He’s a lonely creepy guy who never stops complaining about life or girls. Your demise starts as soon as you dare greeting him which would take from 15 minutes to an hour resulting in perpetually painful headaches and long lasting migraines! So I quickly learned how to look busy and responsible when he’s around!



Halfway during the show Ms. Vendetta came over to speak to me….I moved back a little bit just to see if she had an athame or any other sharp object which could pierce my delicate skin! She had a black fan in one hand and a mask covering half of her face in the other! I thought that it was such a pity to hide her angelic seductive little smile. Then again she might have had a bad case of acne which I didn’t wanna expose! A pimple was always capable of throwing her life of balance!

Thoughts blasted through my head during our brief conversation which isn’t something I’m used to and such a reaction was a good enough for me to walk away from her but didn’t bother at that time!

We could still communicate just by looking at each other and neither of us got impressed by the fashion show and the fact the she was still some weird definition of beauty freaked me out and made me go to the restrooms again to see if I’m still me!



At this point in time, liquor started taking its toll on people. Some squishy movement from a man by the urinals confirmed that! Without even wanting to, I glanced over my shoulder to find him doing something which didn’t look like peeing at all. Remotely disgusted I worked my way out not before overhearing some jagged wheeling forced through his tracheotomy that got imprinted in my brain which was even more disturbing then seeing my naked grandmother by accident!



The presenters announced that a male contest is taking place. Seeing that I’m always participating in women’s beauty contests, I didn’t feel like it! But before you know it, she came back and conned me into doing it, so there I was on stage wondering what the fuck did I get myself into! Seeing 20 pints of cheap beer on the table wasn’t something which helped my moral at the time!

They instructed that the first round was an arm wresting competition on stage and who ever wins against his opponent gets to take part in a beer drinking competition!

So there I was on the hiding at end of the stage looking at all the tick big mother fuckers lining up for some free beer which made it look impossible for me to win. The fact that I hated beer and couldn’t drink it without feeling sick only made matters worse…

But all I had to worry about is finding someone who was willing to arm wrestle me with his left hand…Naturally I managed to find an average built looking guy who excepted…So There I was waiting with the other winners going on round two!



This flabby bold Italian came over next to me and muttered something! He kind of made an ass out of himself when the one who conned me asked him in Italian about his thoughts on the party and he answered ‘’ the sea’’! His tick short neck bobbing back and forth made me think of how much beer that pipe can get down in a single breath! In a callow attempt to be cool he flashed over his biceps for me!



Every contestant was smashing the glass back onto the table and cheering as if they won some kind of new brain which set me to believe that most of the male species didn’t change much from the barbarian days!

I was up next and a short smart looking guy wanted to challenge me…

I took a deep breath and started downing that shit which felt like drinking gasoline!

Have way through the glass I spit half of it out and put the glass back on the table…He must have thought I downed it cause he put his glass down with a shameful expression so I quickly stuck the glass back to my lips and away I go to the final stage! I was feeling sick so I got to the back of the stage and made funny expressions! I sort of pitied the poor guy because it is quite depressing to loss a beer contest with me!

The final challenge was that the remaining four of us had to get up on stage in our underwear which was a bit of a problem for me! All the chains wrapped around me were a hassle but I happened to be wearing one of my fishnet G-strings which is as good as going up naked!

Most of the audience was made up of guys and knowing their mentality made it even worse! I have no problem with sex in public but nudity on stage seemed rather different!



I had some sort of consolation thanks to a girl who was a finalist and resorted to coming up topless on stage which upset my stomach though I do respect her for her courage!

Backing out seemed pointless, after all most of us done things which they regret and this was mine!

In anyway, too many people confuse my gender so I felt the need to prove my sexuality, so I went up in my G and span around a couple of times to make sure they saw it from all angles!

Every guy just stared and some laughed as photographers took pictures as if I’m a weird version of Michael Stripe!

I felt as exposed and unwilling as a kid back in elementary school trying to get his pants up while bullies ripped his jockeys off and laughed at his small whinny!....



After taking a silver chalice with a pentacle on it which was made by Alchemy I went down to a corner as some came over complimenting me on my courage and getting me lots of different drinks and mixing them together which explains why I got drunk!



I still suspected why she tricked me into doing it. Was it a deliberate act of sabotage in order to pay me back for all the pain I caused her or was it a secretly planned opportunity to satisfy one of her fetishes! Either way, it’s was a good one! I also thought that it might have been a pure act of innocence though I find that hard to believe as she’s what heaven rejected and what hell is afraid to take in!