thoughts
my hearts is lost.
my heart is gone.
never wanting to know the truth.
scared to see the truth in what people can really be.
life is just another game.
life never shows what is truly true.
life is just full of bull shit game that everyone like to play.
falling in and out of love.
having a baby and not knowing who the father is.
falling for that one that you know you could never have.
scaring yourself until there is nothing left of you.
falling even hard everytime you turn around.
not knowing what to do.
you hear the words you want to hear but are they true??
you never know.
scared to be dicked around.
scared of that pain that you know that waits for you everytime you turn around.
i have always been a dreamer. i have always been me.
you walked into my life and evertyhing went to shit.
my soul is dead and my heart is a jigsaw pizzle now.
tryed to be nice, i tryed to be fair.
i let you go and tryed to say no.
i have loved you and i have try to care for you.
i let you be free. but my feelings won't disappear.
now your gone and gone for good. my soul has let go
and my heart is getting better.
There is a new guy in town. there is so much to tell and so little time to do it.
my heart is there and the butterflies comes back,. a smile on my face and tear in my eye.
we talk and we sit and we do whatever we do we know we have eachother.
i am done and over what pain used to be there. i am now back to being me.all is fair.
Some day your gonna think of me.
someday your gonna cry for me
someday I'll feel so much better without you being on my mind.
One of these nights you'll think of me and wish maybe what we had wasn't so bad.
But I'll be okay
what we has was just a fling.
Someday you'll see my smiling face
And i am just gonna laugh and walk back out of your life.
I have what I know I should have in my life.
I have my family. i have my friends but most of all
i have that one part of me i know I lost when we were together.
would u miss me if i never came back? would u even wonder whatever happened to me?
Would even care if i died fast or slow?
would u even care if i regretted my last breathe?
would u even give a fuck of what i left behind?
would u??
Would you ever think of the reason i let go?
would you even think of the people i left behind?
would you even think about all the reasons why?
would you even think about the shit i told u then?
would you ever forget me?
would you ever forgive me?
would you ever sayyour sorry for never hearing my cryes?
would you?
would u ever think that your the reason why?
would u think it was cuz i couldn't live my life anymore?
would u??
Hate the world and everyone in it.
Hate the one who means the most
Hate the words that came out of ones mouth
hate the soul in ones body.
Hate the one standing in your way
Hate the wall blocking you light
Hate the friend who is no longer there
hate the parents who pushed you away
Hate the way i am today
Hate the way i am tomorrow.
hate the way i stood to tall
hate the way i handled my sorrow
Hate the past and almost everything in it.
Hate the good and love the bad
Say good bye to that perfect one.
Hide in the fear and live in night of Black Good Bye
Sweet sweet nights of never sleep.
Enter pain and enter Hate.
Leaving happy and ending loving.
A heart gone back to the one.
Good bye for now and Good night forever.
Sleep in the light of a new tomorrow.
Dear Soldiers,
Thank you for standing on the battle field.
As we Kneel to pray, We think of you.
Dear Soldiers,
We welcome you home with arms wide open.
As you fought for us.
Dear Soldiers,
I stand at the river side, wishing we didn't have to fight.
Dear Soldiers,
To know your standing on a cold battle feild, means alot to us.
Dear Soldiers,
Knowing that you're spending your holidays alone makes me sad.
Dear Soldiers,
Stand by me when the world is being fixed. Tell me it will be okay.
Dear Soldiers,
Say the bad dream is over now.
Tell me i have nothing to fear.
Dear Soldiers,
Thank you for everything with love.
Copyright ©2005
Forget it all
forget me now
for get what it all means
because its not working now
forget the words
forget the looks
forget the time
becuase its not working now
forget the smiles
forget the tears
forget it all
because its not working now
forget the feelings
forget what its worth
forget it
because its ot working now.
i hate everything you make me think
i hate everything you tryed to make me be
i hate everything you thought you could get away with
i hate everything you made me believe
Your love was fake
your hearts not there
Fuck you
your a bastard
i hate you
i hate you for making me hate
i hate you for everything u put me through
I hate you for making me believe that you were my everything.
i hate you for making me cry every night since i left
i hate you and i know in my heart that one day it will dispear just like you in the middle of the night.
I hate you for not letting me live my live
i hate you for not letting me be me.
i hate you for shattering my dreams and my world.
I HATE YOU!
I am sorry i left I am sorry i left and just walked out that door. I am sorry i just couldn't take it anymore. I know i hurt you and i know i did worng. I am sorry my lil sister, what i did it was wrong. I saw you cry because you were mad. i saw you cry becuase what i made you feel. I am sorry that i hurt you. I wish it would all just change. i am trying my hardest, to make you see, see the way i changed myself. How better i have became. I am sorry you had to see the cops show up that night. I am sorry you had to tell them everything that has gone on. I am sorry that i ran from them. I am sorry that our worlds have changed. I am sorry that my heart not there. i am sorry that you can't see me now. I am sorry i left that day.
what kind of life is this?
everyone fighting
everyone is mad at each other
what kind of life is this when all you want to do is hide
when all you want to do is just die
what kind of life is this
when no one cares what other people want
when no one cares what other people need
what kind of life is this
when you don't know what you did was right
when you don't know what's coming up next
what kind of life is this
when depression sets in and no one knows
when hate fills everything you do.
what kind of life is this
when everything seems like its all going to shit.
when everything just doesn't go right.
what kind of life is this
when everyone turns their backs on you.
when everyone just slowly disappears
what kind of life is this
when all is lost in moments time
when all is forgotten in just one day
what kind of life is this
when the end of the day comes to shit.
when the days seems black and the sun doesn't excest
what kind of life is this???
Hell no!
i am not going through this again!
Hell no my life is not supposed to be this way!
Hell no
i can't do this again.
Everytime i fall in love every time my heart takes another turn.
Someone steps in my way
someone jump on my head.
Hell no
my family hates just as much as those who say they are my friends.
Hell no
i can't take this shit anymore.
Why does my heart drag me this way.
Hell no
my soul is dead my heart is cold. My world is drak and i can't see your face.
The unknown of the world around you
love is near but its seems so far away
coldness surrounds you
Yet the warmth of someone arms are around you
The conflict of deception is standing next to you.
The one you love, you don't love nomore
Lost and confused
mind is full but you draw a blank
do you think you don't?
or do you truely love him to the fullest.
Cold and scared, Dark and alone?
Shadows moving but no on ethere.
voice talking with the wind of one.
sound of moving thing but nothing moves.
Cold and scared, Dark and alone!
Cold has ice.
Red so dark.
freely falling
to the ground.
Heart wide open
bleeding down
soul wonder without a care.
Scream for something to get me out of here.
bleeding hearts without a care.
my soul deads.
and no one dares to wake's me up.
For my bleeding heart has gone to far.
nothing left.
no more no less
Mirror, mirror on the wall.
Tell me this and tell me all.
Why must I live this way?
Tell me why, why do they treat me like this everyday?
Mirror, mirror on the wall tell me this, tell me all.
Tell me why I wanna die?
Tell me why I always cry?
Mirror, mirror on the wall.
Tell me this and tell me all.
Why the fuck do I do this to me?
Tell me why, why am I scared?
Mirror, mirror on the wall.
Tell me this and tell me all.
Why the fuck are they scream at me?
Why the fuck do I have these scars?
Mirror, mirror on the wall.
Tell me this and tell me all.
Why the fuck you show me this?
Why the fuck did you tell me this?
I never thought I could turn this way
I never thought I would see him again
I never thought I could stand with pride.
I once fell down and thought I died.
I never could have seen it coming.
I never thought I would feel this way
I gave up and ran away.
I thought what I did, I did for good.
Never want to think again
never want to hear that name again
never want to cry those tears. never want to see that friend again
I never thought I life would be
like something fell and lands on me
I never thought my family could see
everything I did I did it for me
I never thought I would be
anything that I dreamed.
I never thought anyone cared
I ran and I ran just to land
right back in the place I stood before
falling I thought it would never stop.
Until that day I landed on the ground.
Happy thoughts and happy dreams.
Never would come with all these bad memories.
pills pills sinking in pills.
Never caring you can do as you will
blood and knives all over now.
Think how much this pain will take over now.
Screaming, screaming now.
Someone help pull me out.
Dying sighing all over again
Crying eyes,
tears of blood
never know how much more i could take.
falling from the safty net.
trying to forget the pain.
trying to forget mains.
past the time with all my pain.
never knew how much i could hate.
never knew the true feeling of love.
i wish i could disapear.
i wish i could run away.
just like before.
feeling so lonely.
Its more then what i am willing to take.
Wishing i could still feeling you love me.
What happened to our dreams?
It keeps getting worst when its supposed to be getting better.
We used to be prefect.
Everything used to come together
now its just falling apart
You used to said your so in love with me
Never want to leave my side.
Everytime we look theres something going wrong.
What happened to wanting to be together for the rest of our lives?
I'm amazed by how much we have fallin apart
Feeling so lonely.
wishing it would go away.
wishing i didn't feel way out of place.
We have been putting off on telling whats going on.
Let it end and let this stop
my heart can't take anymore of this
this love we know is gonna end.
But who am i to tell the future.
so if you can tell this is all in my head,
then i know i can wake up from this nightmare.
Tell me that you need me.
tell me that you believe in me.
tell me my heart is gonna be broke.
show me how u feel
show me you're thinking of me.
I am feeling lonely in this relationship.
Lost it all,
all for what?
forgot it all,
all what for what?
done it again,
again for what?
walked away,
away for what?
could figure it out for anything in the world
and why?
because I was so in love with you.
couldn't see,
see what everything wasn't working out.
didn't want to give up,
give up for what?
shouldn't of tryed,
tryed for what?
wouldn't of worked,
worked for what?
Forget it all
forget me now
for get what it all means
because its not working now
forget the words
forget the looks
forget the time
becuase its not working now
forget the smiles
forget the tears
forget it all
because its not working now
forget the feelings
forget what its worth
forget it
because its not working now.
Can you forgive me, for the way i have been acting?
Can you forgive me, for all the tears I've cryed?
Can you forgive me, for all the things I'va said and regret?
I wish you could see whats going on inside my head.
If you could understand that your my one true friend.
Can you forgive me, for everything I've done wrong?
Can you forgive me, for crying because I don't want to loose you?
Stay with me and forgive me.
Can you forgive me, for not understanding what's going on in the world around me?
Can you forgive me, for all the hurt I've caused you?
Can you forgive me, for believing that i can't live this life without you?
Can you forgive me, I never meant to hurt you?
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