The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

True to Yourself~
20:41 Apr 14 2010
Times Read: 559

We as humans are fallible, remembering this simple fact will serve to make life and the living of it easier to deal with.

Others will always be capable of disappointment.

Count on no-one but your self then you can only be pleasantly surprised from time to time.

Whether it be in body spirit or mind,.

Share what makes you happy to share

Give of yourself what you're most comfortable in giving

Allow known what best suits you to uncover

Make others prove they are worthy of your trust,

and in all you give feel good in knowing

you have given and shared only the best you had to offer

Then no matter the outcome....

No matter where time takes the deeds done,

words spoken, or thoughts felt

you will be content to look back at the record of who you are,

and know that above all you were always

True to yourself

* Warning*A REEEEALLY BIG RANT~
16:23 Apr 14 2010
Times Read: 575

Okay so this has been building up for a little while now, since I joined VR actually.

I know I’m sort of preaching to the choir while maybe being a bit of a hypocrite here

But well its about the damn rating system

I know everyone has their right and some of the profiles here are like stepping into another world and though I am speaking for myself now I know id have line of others behind me in saying,

“What besides the mouse in your hand gives you the right to judge?”

Isn't everything relative.. What one considers beauty, another might see as trash.

Where one feels free to share another might feel too uncomfortably naked in doing so. More vulnerable than any site is worth….anyway like I said its all relative.

From my first day I got more than a few very low numbers and I was at first surprised then thought it funny how much importance is placed on something that in the grand scheme of things is soo damn trivial..

Sadly it seems your numbers are helping in your status and your status is helpful to your coven

In so learning that I began to care, I added information pictures thoughts and a background with some help because (yes I’ll admit it)

I have no talent for this computer shit AT ALL

During my process of attempting to conform I got constant messages about

not liking this or that .then wanting to see me add that or this.

All requests, no… I take that back, “Demands” if I wanted a better rate…

You cant please everyone, that goes without saying, though I did in fact just say it *laughs at myself *

Maybe i'm a softy but being a bit of an empath I feel for people.

This might possibly to some be my biggest fault.

I know many here enjoy this venue and others as a place to be tough or vicious and berate others so they might feel big and mighty for whatever reason

I say hey rant and rave all over your own profile,

even in forums if there are any for that type of thing.

If its real and true, honesty is great it strengthens and teaches

So, I am a true believer in the Church of

{Whatever doesn't kill you only serves to make you stronger.}

after a late night with no sleep, where I finally drank to the point of blunt honesty

I have come to the conclusion that we all have a bit of evil in us~

A drop of the nasty if you will.

Come on people think about it- haven't you ever, you knew just knew you shouldn't

but you did anyway...anything???

yeah I thought so, we all have.

Had a day that you just felt a little mean call it a need to vent or PMS or giving someone what they deserve maybe

but you cant say you didn't enjoy that outburst of ~ venom~right?

Say or do something to someone or always better yet with someone with the excuse of " oh I was soooooooooooo drunk" ha!! who hasn't been there??? Just said or done something outright nasty just because Dammit it felt good? Lets not be hypocrites here come-on you know you have

yeah me too..but I am here to tell you, savor it when you do it because it does and it will come back and bite you on the ass one day, trust me on that :)

you may like that thought too but just try to take a moment before those horns appear and ask yourself "will it be worth it in the long run?"

Because you will see a guest reappearance of that wicked way again someday. If you're prepared, then hey go for it by all means live it up and enjoy.

Just remember that life is a great fun sexy fantastic club but in some way or another we all PAY to get in!

I have been revisiting mine and I am thankfully not dead just a hell of a lot stronger. ok so yes I am sure this isn't something most people will want to read...but I feel a sort of need to just vent my heart here.....

But this.. is well, unproductive how it lowers some esteem

while unrightly (yep my own word) raising others.

So many taking on this pompous holier (or “Sinly” for here) than thou attitude

that most wouldn't dare even admit to in RL..

Come on seriously how does “your for you’re”

or “there for their” really damage your life at all if you are truly so big and mighty…

True Intelligence comes from just knowing, sharing your knowledge when asked or its needed is benevolent to a point and is being a teacher

But being critical where it isn’t needed to make yourself seem better

is in truth merely showing your insecurity…

and though yes I know all things and events in life are lessons learned

and we do learn a lot from the assholes and son of a bitches…

every once and awhile ya just get tired of their shit

lets give everyone room for individuality here and not force everyone to conform to what we think they should have going on …’ isn’t that why you came here in the first place

for the place and space to freely be different?

Be unique be whoever and whatever makes your little happy spot all warm and gushy

Find your happy whatever it is but don’t impose it and your rules on everyone else

It is a part of a much larger plan whether you think God or Fate or Yin and Yang or Satan or cosmos or the Tuna God!

Anyway it would warm my heart and other very worthwhile parts if we could all just try to focus on what is really important in this life...and not fall for all the happy meal advertising that corporate America wants us to buy. We don't have to love it just because general consensus says the majority does!

FUCK the majority, be an individual..

that's what the world remembers,

THAT is what Legends are made of!

Sorry just little tired of seeing everyone falling for the same old shit!

Tired of seeing good people being made to feel inferior

just because Vogue says they aren't....vogue!

Who the fuck is vogue anyway

Aren't we really just a little sick of swallowing all this crap!

nobody says we have to. So come on take off the labels take off the mask stand up and proudly be yourself!

I'll do it with you ok?

anyway told you, you probably wouldn't want to read this...

and no its no where near that time of the month either.

just me!

love to you all and please pay no attention to the man behind the curtain..lol



Thanx

have an outrageous day...

lot o love in general..:)

I Stand Here Naked Before You ~
15:05 Apr 14 2010
Times Read: 582

I stand here naked before you



I stand here naked before you bathed in the true light of love.

Standing without shame without fear more naked than I have never been, for your eyes for your pleasure.

For you I have stripped myself of every garment every ideal every prop I may use to excite or invite.

For you I have lowered all my defenses and reveal my true self, all that I am, all the I have concealed to others.

Naked before you, without even a touch my passion pours forth from me to you as the true need that it is.

This is why I show you all, its an offering to you not unlike an offering to the Gods in hopes of being in favor to be pleasing in their eyes.

As my gift I offer my skin, its yours for your pleasure my lips my eyes my arms to wrap around you and warm you my hands to caress your body softly like a million butterflies or grasping you roughly in loves passion.

I offer my breast for you to touch to see to rest upon if you feel the want. My thighs for your touch my back all that I am is a gift to you. I'd use my tongue to bathe you and taste you from head to toe.

All of me, there is nothing I wouldn't offer to you. My heart has always been yours my mind body and soul have taken but a blink to follow.

Only because of the uncertainty of being human (that blink ago) making me unsure, feeling fear human fear but you and what you offer are so above that, that I must reach deep inside myself, above myself, and offer you more.

So as I say in a blink, I strip myself body and soul I reveal more of me all of me that I have never shown before and I offer it now without fear to you, I stand for your approval but I will kneel, bow down before you humbling myself for your acceptance.

Know this though, in your acceptance of me you raise me from my knees placing me equally at your side.

By acknowledging me my power my strength grows to equal you to be equal to you so that I can stand by your side and as you do stand naked unafraid.

In your acceptance you give me a gift. Loves gift and I can live and be confident in you. Being your equal your partner your mate. So look upon your gift take me. I am covered in only my love my passion my desire for you.I have no greater gift to offer you. See me standing here as I am naked before you.

Currently listening: Everything I Have Is Yours: The Best of the M-G-M Years By Billy Eckstine

At The Waters Edge~
14:57 Apr 14 2010
Times Read: 583

At the waters edge

cooled by time, warmed by care

i dropped my pretense on the ground beneath me

subtlest hint of my desire as it trickles down

the bank sooo safe.. grass green beneath my delicate feet

on my own on what choices i stand here

solid is this earth under me

i can lie back reposed in this safety

i lay exposed to the sky where my Gods image drifts

from my thoughts to heavens playful imaginings

the air around me pounds his heartbeat across my flesh

laying here in my haven secure from the fear of trying i can visualize

laying for him.. feeling his soft leather collar about my throat and cuffs at wrists and ankles

placed there not to hurt or humiliate but to help free me

he does know that the binding of my fears sets my desires free lets loose so well the wild one inside

feet planted in my security, legs bent, back arched, feeling the cool familiar green at my ass.. soft subtle assuring, shoulders bearing my weight arms above my head chest jutting upward and forward.... passion presented

i am all you created and i am waiting...

each breeeze your lifes breath on me..

stirs my own desires to flow crystaline drops to lips

in need of your firm acknowledgment.

You own me already i only need hand you the key of me...

seeing this in my dreams here on the safe solid shores of my existence i sigh

knowing its truth

awaits this simple gesture...

in my minds eye easily done i stand

slip one foot off the shore into the water...

it is at once cool and warm, as am i

it has a flow a strength and gentle caress not unlike my own...

next foot in...

i feel the current as it hits my legs

gentle little stings of cool invade my thighs

head back as it builds some and slashes across my breasts

nipples perk delighted in the attentions

i feel each cooling calming drop then rolling tracing

as it sears its way slowly down my stomach...

as each drop of liquid desire melds and merges with my own need and it glistens there..

i catch my breath, one unexpected slap of water hits in such a way that my legs weaken and a smile spreads across my face as the low unavoidable moan escapes hungry lips..

i almost drop..

legs close to giving the release of me to the flow that is....

sooo close to that.. yesssssssss

knees feeling the soft undercurrents banks, lips spread awaiting wanting begging swelling with lifes need

head back rhythms ajoined

all of me just about screaming,

that thankful cleansing baptizing fulfilling releasing yessssss

and fear.. fear again steps up dragging my almost limp drenched body from the swells back to the safety of my self created shore....

eyes opened

still feeling your heartbeat pounding my soul from all around

happy and sad in my imaginings still laying i notice now toes in the splashing froth i have inched the tiniest bit closer to

the waters edge~

Who i am~
01:27 Apr 14 2010
Times Read: 592

I am female to my core

All I am is about touch scent sight taste

All I am is to be pleasing to the one I adore

All I need to do so, is to know I am cherished

And in that knowing I grow my love, my need my trust strengthens

In trust I unfold

Not changing necessarily, but pulling out parts of me possibly never before seen and

maybe even not known to myself before

my need becomes to please while still being happy with who I am

desire is my blood that pumps from my heart that is love pure

and all that I am is offered to him as the truest gift I could ever lay at his feet

seeing him pleased in the me I offer

seeing his desire for me and all I am to him is the greatest gift he can give me

and it strengthens my want to always see that desire in his eyes

I am woman I carry the curves the breasts the gait and scent of a woman

And for him I am beyond proud to be the shining soft feminine example of woman I am

I am strong I stand up for those I love and care for yet

For him I will stand behind if he chose, to show my respect and trust for him

I am soft spoken but for him I will loudly proclaim I am his for I am proud to be so

Any talents I endow are used in constant for his pleasure and

I will strive to better my abilities in things that improve who I am and please him to see in me.

I trust in him enough to go to him if I have questions or doubts or concerns about things

presented to me that I am unsure of.

I know he trusts in me to make decisions and choices in things that are for our and my own betterment and so I don’t bother him with all the small things.

I know his pride in me includes my ability to be as independent as I am and yet still choose to give my all to him at his whim.

I am from my very core submissive…

To me that means it is always, every minute, every day, my choice to give myself to him

And so too, it is renewing a trust so deeply every day

A gift every day is given by both, mine in giving his in receiving

and its never to be taken for granted

Each days end I recap and assess how in that day I grew and stretched

And how it pleased him and gave me more pride and faith in myself

And in the end each day I see my trust has increased

And our bond has been further bolstered

And I am at the end of each day as I close my eyes laying next to him

More and more happy.. with thanks to him, to be

Who I am

The Animals we choose, or do we~
18:48 Apr 13 2010
Times Read: 595

I was pondering the animals we chose.. you the wolf/cat black and yes I know it

I see it always in my minds eye when your lips are to my ear and you breathe talk and growl into my very core

I see you your face just a breath away from mine staring right into me

large sleek wolf cat panther, eyes on fire deep and dangerous yet wide and calm

and I at first I was perplexed at my own choice but now … yes

the horse.. looks proud looks strong head held high but skittish always ready to run

little twitches at any quick movement to near me

takes a lot to trust and until trust it felt again ready to run..

running wild yet scared through the wood in my fear easily jumping many hurdles

yet not even then realizing my abilities never seeing my reflection

never really seeing the beauty always afraid of even my own image

like a wild pony badly broken early on I am afraid of what I am capable of

afraid of truly knowing the power I have inside..

and drawn at odds to the cat where I could easily be his prey

instead I his unicorn he my teacher my protector

easily enough he could pounce strong jaws biting down at my neck taking me off my feet to the ground and breaking me that much further but he does not, he leads..

he could be leading me to my doom away from safety to devour me

but he does not, he teaches

I because of the power I have inside, if I knew could trample him having so much more power in this than I know power not in the strength of my frame but in the strength of my heart

That is what has weakened the wolf/ cat to the horse, on a cool somewhat cloudy day as the clouds parted and the sun shone he saw her heart in that he saw her strength her pride her soul

And in this instance the usual course of nature was forever altered

Though not a match by any standard somehow they were exactly what the other needed

The missing piece to each others puzzle

You my strong beautiful majestic sleek wolf cat

so powerful so able to destroy and still so care “full” for me and of my heart

I your thoroughbred easy to sprint off able to leap brush and hurdle to be safe and alone

but now willing to be harnessed to be tamed and taught and trained to be all I am capable of to be by your side…

the very unlikely pair the big wolf powerful/ cat and the horse … but then again mother nature does have a perverse sense of humor doesn’t she

Life a most amazing journey~
17:52 Apr 13 2010
Times Read: 600

Life is the most amazing journey

We walk down so many paths meet so many amazing souls friend and foe

From each good or bad we learn the lessons of our lives

Some are there merely to hold our hands

Some to push our buttons

Some are there, seeming to be less… so we can feel like we are more

Some hold up a mirror to all our best attributes complimenting praising growing our pride

Some make us uncomfortable because in them we unconsciously recognize a part of us we would prefer never to see

Some are like revisiting a favorite time in our life and each thought of them

each moment shared is always without a doubt a joy

Some are our greatest treasure

Some our deepest heartache

Some touch our hearts permanently and intensely

but life doesn’t allow us to have them within arms reach to hold them close

Some we just need to dislike

Some we cant help but love

Some make up laugh

Some make us cry

Some make us feel like we can do anything

Some will try to get us to try anything

There will be loves that change our lives in the very biggest of ways

And though they may not be that “love” forever they will always be with us in our hearts

Like children we will love them no matter where they roam

and wish them all the best of life

Every person is an event in our lives

Each one a piece of the magnificent puzzle that will complete our life

Some days wont be very easy to understand or to get through it but we do

Some days will be something you’ll want to live forever and in your heart they will

In the intricate weave of the cloth that is your life each thread each soul is a gift

Whether tear or laughter filled each thread is needed to make the beautiful unique tapestry of your life

Take some time each day step back and admire all that has been created just by your being here

People you’ve met changed touched helped …..

Each one needed that particular experience with you in their lives to make their tapestry complete as well.

NO THING in life is a waste of time

It’s all a part of our journey so live it experience it review it and enjoy

enjoy it dear dear friends~

Body and Soul~
17:29 Apr 13 2010
Times Read: 605

I sit here legs crossed Indian style at my home desk … my thighs and lips still damp, no wet from the thought of you on my fingertips as they played..

Even now just the thin material between hand and heat makes me throb as if calling out from deep inside

I run a hand wantonly over my thigh feeling the material under my touch

Feeling it move against my skin with the pressure of my hand over it

And it is you, the weight the pressure the want of you, for you, from you, to you.

I am unfolding as I think of you, as I sit here to type this sonnet of love of lust and need

I feel myself the heart of me opening up as if beckoning to take you in

The orchid flower craving the light or seducing the bee to takes its pollen

Enticing it to lower itself to the flower covering itself it the flowers life and spreading it..

To my breast… my hands become yours, and I know this, as I caress gently,

You have more force more desire just a shade less care for pressure than I

You are in me overtaking my actions with your will more a tug less a stroke

Knowing it will all be good in the end

Your hand in my hair pulling my head back your hand at my throat

Owning what flesh you know is yours owning all you can feel in your palm

With your lips your breath teeth owning where you grab pinch squeeze and penetrate

To have you to feel you will be a darker kind of heaven for me…

An addiction of the soul were the body has even less willpower than with hardest of drugs

Your are a sweet prison I beg to be locked inside your arms, locked in your eyes

To be what you desire the goddess to your worshiping mouth

The slave to her masters desires the benevolent Queen to her brave strong knight

The child to the adult the chaste afraid wench to the sensually sadistic ruler

you true partner in crime to stand sit walk lay crawl and beg to be all you need

Our deepest desires keeping us forever bound being every lover imagined

Every body needed to encase the hearts of fire we create as we touch

Body and soul

I sit here cross legged wishing I were leg wrapped around you

Bound together out of breath sweat and bodies mingled every part used enjoyed

Coveted

All this from a memory of

Body and soul

18:10 Apr 11 2010
Times Read: 614

i am my own anomaly

for i am one that likes to have a category

to a point, for things.

Not out of sense of organization

(that's for the criminally insane )*winks*

but for descriptive purposes in my thoughts and in my writing, as writing is what keeps me vital and keeps me creating inspired inspiring words thoughts feelings hungers desires all.

Yet i am my most obvious dichotomy...

i am female, baby but dont coddle me

i want commitment

but feel discomfort in thoughts of forever

with anyone..

i need to be your Goddess

i want to be your slave

Raise me high above you praise me offer me your all your undying love in service to me,

all thewhile reaching down grasping my throat and taking me primal, until i cry out....

Dont EVER hurt me,

but show me your wild violent unbridled passion for me or simply, be gone

Command me guide me teach me

`i will fight and cry happy`

but never humiliate ridicule or look down upon me

`the mark i strike will bleed you free as i leave`

i am playful but dont play with me

i am shy but brazen beyond belief

it is true i am not an aggressor but once you take choice to advance on me

be it as friend as foe as lover be well prepared

for i will not retreat, but attack..

and not stop until the mission for advance is fulfilled...

i am soft and sweet and cuddly so like a harmless little bunny

yet strike my passions i am liquid fire open the portal and it surges forth from my core...

i speak kind in my words they flutter gentle like a butterflies wings with love and praise and care.

yet hear me in anger and passion, sounds and words light from my lips as such to soothe the dark heart of a demon

i am not wolf i am not witch i am not vamp to my knowledge ...(yet) *Grins*

i am but a thought, a dream, a fantasy, a desire that was made before the Gods slept so very many ages ago come to its fruition for pleasures sake.

in whatever form it takes pleasure, it will carry my breath upon it...

i am the womb of artistic creation

i am muse

so

*smiles broadly being quite introspective*

i guess i do have a category for me,

me

i

am

me~

Food for thought...mine~
16:54 Apr 11 2010
Times Read: 618

Hah Interesting

since i am on the cusp i checked both

though i am less the aggressor initially but for the most part ring true for me i think

Gemini Women

Often the aggressor, you are never embarrassed by your behavior because you never adhere to any standards except your own main requirement: a lover who knows how to take his time. You are a one woman harem, but a partner should be aware that in a relationship, the Gemini woman is looking for a combination of the spiritual and the physical, the romantic and the practical. You want to talk to the guy after you tumble with him! Best sex mates are Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius, Libra, and Aries. Favorite gadget: the vibrator (though i havent yet)



Cancer Women and their sexuality

Will never make the first move, but you can be a marvelous lover for you are capable of intense sensuality. You will reciprocate passion with a fervor that will stir his heart and stimulate him to his best performance. On your own time, you have a fondness for masturbation. Your favorite position: lying prone while your man enters you from behind. Best sex mates: Taurus, Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, and Pisces. You may become a slave to sexual pleasure!

born on a cusp~
16:47 Apr 11 2010
Times Read: 619






Looking through your eyes is like dreaming in beautiful colors. Your innocence is inspiring and to those around you. Life may have hardship but you’ll never let it sour you up.





The week of June 19 - 24



This is a girl known for her developed sense of motivation. She can get very inspired to carry on whatever she desires but she remains humble within the process. This sometimes may make people think that she is less dynamic or profound than what she really is.

The Violet Blue Flame~
02:24 Apr 09 2010
Times Read: 641

As i am now, wrapped in my confusion

All heat all passion and hunger consumed

Fire all around me i am swallowed by the flame

But i am its core the heart of the flame

And my core is the birthplace of the flame

i am the lean violet-blue of the flame

The hottest part, its very center.. yet until now i did not know

So here i am imprisoned by my own desires

The flames of my lust licking at my feet

Somehow and for now unexplained the heats been increased

And the flesh of conscious i had up till now worn so comfortably

is swiftly being seared away revealing the true flame

that is me

Stripped naked of all but the desire that i am

i cry out as flames dance around me

Being bathed in this bath of heat

Growing caressed fired in agonies darkest pleasures

i am being reborn now embedded knowledge that i am the core

my essence floats around as if gravity is lost

i touch the droplets shimmering like schwarkofski crystal

As they hang amidst the fire around me all that surrounds me

Is me..

and i know though i am afraid still

now is the time of my awakening..

Sensible vs Primal~~
18:08 Apr 08 2010
Times Read: 658

My sensible public and primal selves seem to be much at odds as of late

Not so sure why but a deeper connection to my sensuality is awakening

Every moment of each day now I am so keenly aware of ….Everything

Breeze on my skin, sun warming flesh, scents of people and things around me

Its as if my senses are electric now.. any contact sets off minuscule eruptions of need,

explosions of desire, a simple word spoken a glance arms grazing some one something

Anything

Not a need to have that particular individual at all,

but to be fed or fed upon or sated somehow an addiction to being fulfilled

Even if by my very own hands every inch of me seems ever hungry for contact

As I walk I get such pleasure from just my thighs rubbing together I can feel the reaction

Sundress sways softly gliding over the small of my back and shifting lightly over my ass

And I find I am focusing on that then a breeze rustles my hair

Head back eyes closed standing in broad daylight in a parking lot

overwhelmed by sensations totally and completely aroused!

not by anyone .. just by being, feeling, breathing, experiencing

its as if my blood was replaced with liquid ecstasy

and even the slightest focus on any thing and I am hungry, physically, sexually, hungry

and more hungry than I have ever been

I want to feel colds, hots, rough textures soft textures grasping gasping deep breath

mouth watering guttural utterances incoherent to observation………… penetration

driving, one hand rests between thighs absentmindly stroking

standing at the fruit bins was almost unbearable today…

Ripe plump red strawberries I wanted to eat and crush them against my skin

I saw them picked them up smelled them deeply as my arm brushed against my breast I caught my breath and suddenly i imagined

being devoured along with them crushed on my skin juices dripping and peaches ..

well, we know my affinity to peaches

I could feel my feral self emerging and I swear I was being watched by others as well

everything everywhere I am receptive to all stimulus these days

and it is all making me hungry animal visceral primal hungry

It feels as if a beast is awakening inside, very hungry

and frankly it does scare me a bit

I am trying with much difficulty to just maintain,

but by the Gods, I am so constantly Hungry~

Affected~
03:30 Apr 08 2010
Times Read: 663

just a word placed here and there when read

hearts beat moves

becomes more a throb less a beat

pounds at lips in need of attentions

small part of me afraid wants to run

larger part hungry

needing

sitting cross legged thin loose nightgown hiked up over thighs heated body in heat

fingers play unconsciously while reading even now while typing and breath catches

heart pounds fingers slide skin glistens

funny how easily while unexpected

appetite desire words made

so affected~

Dreamz~
19:48 Apr 07 2010
Times Read: 681

had this odd dream early this morning

my mother says its me trying to find a way to help me love myself

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm interesting thought there



so my sister my mother and myself are helping someone i dont know, move..

we are in their living room taking a break to drink lemonade when the mailman stops by with a package

while in this very dark room a woman comes in (again in life not anyone i know) she sits next to me rubbing my thigh and tells me how she loves me and can make me so happy and if i just try i could love her as well

i try ever diplomatically and politely to tell her i am not bi sexual nor am i bi curious or poly and though i am flattered " no thank you "

during all of this my mother takes the package from the mail man hands it to my mother who looks at it and hands it to this woman rubbing my thigh

she opens it removes a pair of metal handcuffs

(i like leather not metal btw)

places one on her wrist the other on mine

at this my mother and sister get up smiling and leave and this woman slides her upper body over mine smiling and says " Now you are mine and have to allow me to just do if you let go and just enjoy you will learn to love me" and she begins kissing and nibbling her way over my body and my alarm goes off and i awake to get up and going for the day

still thinking on that one....

what do you think?

Yours~
18:40 Apr 07 2010
Times Read: 686

a story from lifetimes past.......



Come unto me oh Knight strong reluctant warrior

Kneel before me; place your beautiful lips to my feet

Raise your magnificent eyes train your gaze to mine, lift your lips to my knees

Can you sense my heat for you, feel me, and smell my desire, as you are so close

I hold myself proud strong for all I am, and from where I have come

In your eyes, from your love, I am made queen goddess lover mother woman to all

In your sight, I am made pure desire, it permeates the very air when you are near

Whether it’s in closeness or in my thoughts every part of me reacts to my need for you In the darkness I await you and it is then there I reveal my true self

I drop guard and garment and for you I am at my knees

You are my king my lord my master for you I offer all that I am as yours

My heart mind body and soul yours I am your kingdom

On my knees I await you as you enter I feel it Without raising my head my body senses yours, I stand

Naked only my flesh and all that it covers here to offer you I am your slave the girl for your desires the one to ease your mind

To relax your body to entertain and bewitch you nights

Your girl your woman the one to make the world outside easier to bare

The woman the flesh that every day lets you know You are MANI stand but in just a look I will again kneel or lay on my back for you To play for you to share myself with you to show myself to you

I close my eyes my hands yours my fingers yours discovering me

Finding my center knees up feet flat fingertips find heat my legs drop

As I spread myself open further wanting to show you to share with you All of me…. My desire for you has soaked my fingers my breath quickened

Back arched light film of sweat covers my skin I raise my head to find your eyes

In your eyes I see the same desire, a want, a need so strong it makes my body tremble

In a heartbeat you are over me your lips covering me from feet up and again This simple slave that lives to give you all is raised and made goddess The strength of your desire for me has lifted me onto a pedestal so high We are among the very clouds no angel no queen no goddess has ever felt such bliss

You mouth at my thighs whispers the sweetest and truest of prayers to me

I am your one true religion all you covet all you worship and you desire me as I do you Through my cries of ecstasy my soft moans of pure delight I hear you As you profess to me your love your service your life you offer me all

Waves so white-hot so icy blue almost carry my body away Yet you hold me down your strong firm yet gentle hands keep me from drowning Drowning in the ocean of lust of feelings senses more powerful than I have ever known

I cry out to you, uncaring of any one who might hear…my oath

Take me.. Brand my soul with the heat that is you, make me yours I am your property you own me

Tears stream down my face to be feeling this tidal wave of passion So over come by the wonderment of these feelings

To be so blessed by the gods that the vessel chosen to be your One was I

You raise your head and you come closer to me I look into your eyes

My breath escapes me my heart races I silently thank the gods for you So much beauty so much passion one so true To have found me to choose me, again a fresh wave hot primal as you enter me

Marking my very spirit as yours, feeling you fill me, we are one perfect burning flame

My arms encircle you, my legs wrap around you as if to keep you from disappearing

My trembling lips to your magnificent neck I cry..My love my lord my master take me own me For I am always and forever

over ages and lifetimes

Yours~

I Will Shine~
18:26 Apr 07 2010
Times Read: 689

Laying there on your bed

Wrists bound above my head, legs tied down and apart

driven crazy by my pounding heart

Nothing and no where to hide fully exposed

Completely opened to you To you, eyes hands mouth and desires there to do as you bid or forbid

And though bound, I have placed myself here willingly

I have laid down my reservations and offered myself my fears my pains to you You make my body dance for your pleasure and with that, call my own pleasure out of the shadows were they had hid for so long

And that side of me is shown as it never was…On your cool bedcover you have set me onfire

Feeling as though this need will burn my body right through it’s wooden frame

Shy and scared I am embarrassed to look you in your eyes but so hungry so needing to see the want there from you for me in your eyes to know as I hope, that you feel some small part of what I do for you even held down and unable to move, my passion for you pours forth, is so very obvious each touch be it strong, firm or soft and seducing, you steal a bit of my fears from me and further tend the flower of my submission….caring so for it making it grow, bloom the fragrance filling the air around us only making me more hungry more willing

For you I have stripped down my layers of protection like removing my very flesh, and shined the brightest most unforgiving light to reveal, my all I have given you insight to my fears my angers my hurts and pains my loves likes passions and you have shown me the most intense desire I have ever known in this life…You have seen deeper into who I am than even I have ever dared or knew existed On my hands and knees in nothing but collar and cuffs this girl always afraid of her own nudity, fully exposed to you all that I am knees apart head and chest back, heaving from the loss of breath sweat sticking my hair across my face through a flood of tears I hide nothing under your hand I willingly walk through the valleys of pain I had tried to bury deep under layers, under continents of wishes to forget.In your eyes I have become the Greatest Treasure and for you

and only you

I Will Shine…

Preparations~
03:22 Apr 01 2010
Times Read: 635

A tribute for my one and when he finally comes he will know it is for him:



Frustration follows me today like a ghost

Everywhere I turn every scent every touch builds my needs today

Urgent, they are both innocent and primal

I am hungry and crave what it takes to fulfill me to sustain me..

Like a child like a wild animal I cry out for that need to be sated

Nothing else so important for now but to quench this inner burn

In an effort to sooth and calm my raw nerves i strip my clothes away

Pad barefoot into my bath room and turn on the water to my shower

The moment the steam begins to rise the goose bumps appear on my flesh

As the water further heats I gather a few of my scented candles

arranging them along the shower top and the counter of the sink

i turn on some of my favorite music turn off the lights and ready myself for a ritual

one I do in preparation of giving myself to that one true One

the one that will just be it and feel and know and understand my needs and desires

the one that will heal me and help me to grow to the woman I wish to be

for this ONE I continue to prepare and wait….



Candles lit music traveling across the air I step into the steam

At first I stand full center under the flow of water allowing it to incase my body

Feeling its warmth everywhere and in the brief moment imagining his fingers, everywhere the hot water covers, head back eyes closed I sigh

Reaching out eyes still closed I grab my soft loofah

Ahead of me is my collection of liquid body soaps

I grab the white orchid vanilla cashmere first

squeezing the velvety white liquid onto the loofah I scrub

all skin under becoming tingly and pink

neck down across shoulders over breasts feeling each cherry dot perk to this attention

across my stomach around the waste down over the hips and between my legs

silky lips warmth a feel all their own and a different wetness there already…

the scents from the candles and the soap along with the music and my growing desire is making my head light and my thoughts travel

“you need to find someone that meets your needs” I hear… patience

from a familiar voice in my head and I shiver and smile~



well scrubbed and tingling I reach for my razor thinking how on that day I want every inch of me to be as smooth as alabaster

raising my right foot high on the shower wall I add a new soap my mango sugar scrub

enjoying the visual of the razor gliding from ankle to the crease of my thighs

smiling to myself “have to make a waxing appt.”

finshing both legs I quickly shave my underarms

then squeeze a new liquid into my hands

this one a mixture of coconut milk burnt brown sugar and karite butter

I enjoy the feel of the soap in my hands as they glide along my skin

still sensitive from the loofah and hot water

hands glide fingers caress and gently massage arms legs breasts shoulders legs feet and back covering and recovering every inch..

humming to “And heaven stood still” I step back under the water

dousing my head and face. The water feels like lips across mine and the hunger piques again

shampoo to my hair a gentle massage and rinse then conditioner piling my hair up on my head

I go for my last step



Grabbing my body oil gel I squeeze a very generous amount into my hand rubbing them both together. I begin to rub again every inch of my body fingers slipping across each breast pinching nipples so wanting they feel ready to burst..

Hand down sliding in between thighs and again the pulse of the hunger

Like a drum beating inside me I feel it at every nerve

Leaning forward breasts to the cool tile eyes closed my fingers play

Every atom of me is crying out for release I move the shower head turn and slide down the wall laying legs up feet to each side of the tub and allow the water pressure to pound back at the pulse the has been calling forth from my very source..

Propped up on my elbows head back hair now falling to the swirl of water around me eyes closed I imagine that ONE

When he finds me when it is finally he that I prepare for in this way

When the pressure and heat is of his doing and as the first wave of release hits I cry out

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Daddy!

It takes 5 more visits to this wet hot steamy sweet shangrala before I even want to open my eyes and find my way back to reality

And with one last oooooooooooooooooooooooh yessssssss please Daddy……

I drop back down for a moment gather my strength raise up again

stand head under the wonderful healing jets of liquid relief

Just for good measure as I rinse my hair I turn off the hot and let the cold water quickly and fully awaken all my senses ..everything pink and erect I reach for my towel

Sensitive but happy everywhere I pat gently ~smiles~very gently

And dress thinking of the day I finally prepare in such a way for my ONE~

Step by Step~
02:37 Apr 01 2010
Times Read: 641

cautiously i step one small foot in front of the other

looking to the walls reading your thoughts there...

apprehensively i lay down my foot knowing with each step

i am further in and further away from getting out

falling deeper in

words from your mind,.images projected here that are unconsciously

(or so i believed)……. luring me in

the trap set so visibly as to not seem a trap

but each word placed just so, well thought out,

emotions lights set to affect each tone each syllable perfectly..

ever so lightheartedly you toss out your anecdotes on all things of life, laughter, lust,

and love, all the while drawing me deeper in step by step further from my safe solitude.

On this wall lit by flames kisses from candles placed by your hand

as i read you know i envision it all,

mouths searching as light flickers lips full in lusts heat

tongues slick wet with desires being so almost innocently told of here

each shiver read is mirrored in me as i too, shiver

every little breath caught in anticipation echos from me now

sighs in word are my sighs in deed

another step a glance to the wall seeing your humor

and how you just refuse to take anything too seriously… seeming so harmless

further in it be comes darker but in a comforting way,

still i reach inside myself letting my strength be my light and i read on

as you allow me to see the violent passions, playful smacks and gentle caresses

in the safe anonymity of being the inconsequential voyeur.

Do you offer these up just as musings for you in retrospect or for all to see..

or bate to catch just the right prey as you lead them in word by word image by image

and

step by step

for you is the telling a leap of faith or a part of the game

do i follow behind almost to document the dance as predator circles its prey

as step by step the innocent is drawn in

is it of your doing or of my own

that i am the one now being drawn in

step by step

I Am All~
00:13 Apr 01 2010
Times Read: 616

What is good what decides the bad or the wrong

How do we define love, lust, like, care, anger, hurt, pleasure…

How can we know them if not by experiencing them

If this journey is to learn and grow then at some point,

don’t we have need to step into the pool, experience all

feel, be, ingest the spectrum of emotions there are….

Not a majestic or evil plan to hurt or play with others

Not for me this time anyway

Just to BE to understand and walk through the veils of all

I am alive.. I walk the earth, I breathe I pump blood …living blood through veins

Not what most will admit to in life I know, but its me..

I love the feeling.. living…

Taste of sweet at my lips your lips taste of honey of light of dark

sharp like blood flesh and bone…

The feel of it on my fingertips in your hands silk soft cool live warm flesh…

hard cold stone..heart cold stone

Which are you as you take .. which am I as I offer

In taking isn’t there giving of time of care of need

In the offer isn’t there a need to be taken and in so taking something back as well

Head back as I steal a deep breath sweet air..

Eyes closed traveling in my thoughts to the river of lust

Current strong swift overpowering yet it lulls

Heart pounding as the destination approaches me

Want growing desire fired and burning..

Primal needs visceral posturing..all is base,

back to the beginning

And so if its nature if its truth

What is right if there is no right

What is wrong if no one judges?

We are all, at some point.. so in truth does it matter

We are all

I am all you have ever been all you may ever need

If you so chose …

Air water river breath life food blood

I am all~

Facing My Adversary~
00:08 Apr 01 2010
Times Read: 617

i stand facing my adversary

eyes looking so deeply into mine

unyielding unforgiving seeing beyond secrets

viewing without concern my fears and insecurities

this keen cold foe showing not an ounce of compassion

to the frightened girl before them

"you" says the cold voice

"so kind, so sweet and nice i know who you really are."

"you show this face keeping the most of you hidden , and why? thinking deeply inside that without the good what's left of you wouldn't be enough, wouldn't be good enough."

i flinch at the pain this truth inflicts and then again that voice

"you" a humorless laugh "believing that everyone strives for, desires and seeks perfection and you being so far from that can never measure up so why even try?"

The air harsh and cold whips around me like a slap

causing me to shiver under this sterile unforgiving scrutiny.

Timid, frightened, cold, head down,, shoulders rounded forward,

i peer up through eyelashes so as not be too direct

to not really see or be seen, not really...

but this last barrage finds ground in me somehow and settles

i begin to think on it

"everyone strives for perfection" yes,. but no one is truly perfect in everyone's eyes

"can never measure up" measure up to what, what almighty entity has requested me be anything other than who i am?

the air around me begins to warm..

i raise my head up slightly to take in a deep breath feeling the sun rising and warming my flesh

feels wonderful as ribcage rises with lungs filling slowly with air

feels liberating, reassuring,

i took that breath

no one can take it for me but me

standing straighter still shoulders back

i look my accuser in the eyes

i am me, there is no other me in existence which indeed makes me special..

i may not be perfect in every eye that beholds me by i am the only one, the only me..

no one wears this skin pink white freckled dimpled exactly as i do

no ones hair hangs in the exact way, fine soft red waves cradling shoulders and face

no ones hips curve just like mine

only i see the beauties of life through these eyes

my breath to catch in my throat at that secret thought of desire as it effects only me the way, it does

my lips full cupids bows of palest pink to taste and touch every terrain i desire them to.

Being either soft and pliable or tense and unwelcoming,

they are mine to share to give and only mine.

Deepest breath yet, addressing my foe

"i know now i am not perfect but i am ME and i choose to be the very best me i can. It wont be done in a day, life is about the baby steps when we are growing and learning, but each day i will find a new pride in this unique creature i am. Each day i will more easily shed my fears and needs for props and illusions in hopes that the one that is seeking me will see the perfection of my imperfections and will pay honor to the beauty of my gift of self. Knowing the journey i have taken to be a long one he will respect and treasure even more my honesty in the not knowing and slowly lead me into my bloom..."

upon saying this i stand at full height and though i am not tall i feel i am towering over my life enemy....

leaning in close nose to nose less than a breath away i say

"you are but a reflection of self, i am flesh blood bone heart spirit and soul.

What you might have thought and inflicted on me hold no more weight so either grow with me and be my friend or be gone.

Today is the day i stop hiding so be silent in your negative images or go"

Pulling back the slightest bit i wipe the tear from under my eye brush a wisp of hair from my eyes smile at my image in the mirror before me head high deep breath shoulders back i turn from my persecutor a mere reflection in the mirror.

excited for the day to start.

Love Is In The Distance~
00:05 Apr 01 2010
Times Read: 619

Looking out over the horizon

i can see the rain, far off in the distance

i know some how… that very rain, is falling around you

i can see the heavy droplets as they darken the colors on your shirt

Resting so contently against your chest

As one draws your lashes together to make points like a star

Or the one that falls down your cheek or runs softly down your lips

In my mind i see one as it rolls down your hand

i am jealous of each drop as it falls on you

able to be so close, able to stroke your skin

So i imagine each wet drop of rain

is formed from the dew upon my lips

As i sit here hands softly running over each

Moisture making finger tips glisten

i raise my fingers to the east and gently blow..

i see it traveling across much time and space

And as it joins with the rest

It carries the very essence of me to you ..

And in my minds eye as each drop now falls on you

i smile

Knowing a very personal private part of me

Infused in each drop has already begun

to ever so gently kiss and cover you….

Looking out over the horizon

i can see the rain in the far off distance

But now i know as it melts across your skin and soaks in

It is the gift of my desire for you covering you

As would the gentle caress of my arms

As would the soft sweet butterfly like flutters of each kiss of my lips

As they honor you

as if it were i falling around you instead of that rain

i feel rain on my face…its falling from my eyes

As i sit smiling

Looking out over the horizon

Because i know

Looking out over the horizon

Love is in the distance~