The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

It's so late. Tomorrow is another day of sad joy. Sad joy is something you are greatful to have yet sad that you don't want it. I have sad joy. Sometimes I just sit and wonder the "What if" things. So fucking tiring that now I am thinking I am becoming numb to the world and its people. Watching people go to and fro with their lives. What I most hate is my friends. They love me and well it's tiring. I hate where I live. Among the rich and I am poor. I live in a place in Lower Manhattan and always am looked down on for being black and poor. Sometimes I sit in my room looking out at the sky and pray to my God to not let me fall. We are angels brought to this earth to make a choice. Right and wrong. People always tell me lately "God loves you" or "God is here in your presence I feel the love from him" sometimes I wonder if it's love or delusions these people feel. To follow blindly. To trust that nothing will come of harm to them because their God loves them so much. I am ungreatful. I dance with demons and flirt with death. I truely love it. What is it I feel here in my heart? I don't know anymore. But I think I will sit and look out my room window and think about it

no...

No..

I have yet to know...

No its not that its just..

Why do you do this to me?

Why? Why me?

Why are you here?

I understand but.....

You...

Your just hurting me

You make me cry with your sad face

Are you cold?

No?

How can you not be only wearing that

I dont want to come here

Will you...?

Yes

Yes I want that.

For you to leave

Because everythime I see you since 3 years ago you just simply wont leave me alone

Why do you haunt me?

Running?

What do I have to run from besides you?

You scare me so much.

Why wont you talk?

Why are you here?

You make me cry you know?

*sighs*

Go away miss

I am sorry if your lost...

Leave me be

Soon I wont be in new york for you to hunt me.

No I wont

You wont find me miss