Pai passed away at home, in my arms, yesterday. I cannot believe how much this household misses him. We knew he was tiring out and had made many adjustments to keep him happy in his senior years. I spent the last week with him, always being near to him and cuddling him as much as he wanted.
I knew it was the right time and we had been proactive enough to catch things before he was in pain. I know I had 16 years with him and I know he was a happy dog. I know all of these things but it feels like there is a hole in my center. I'm trying to work and all I can think about is his empty bed in my studio room and how he and Bria would both nap together in this room while I worked.
I just can't hold him in my arms and it's like some part of me won't accept that.
How do we do this? How do we overcome grief when we say goodbye to such pure and beautiful friends? I don't know. Love and grief seem to travel together. Right now I'm praying for some grace to carry us through this.
Some of you here knew him, and some of you have met him. Thank you for loving him along with us. Thank you, Rat, for the shrimp and cheese when we visited. Pai adored you. Thank you, Cartomancer, for Pai's Tarot reading. It gave us much comfort and peace, and also thank you for helping me when my grief was screaming. Your words, like always, are healing.
Most of all, thank you Pai, for being you.
COMMENTS
-
Theodora
14:12 Aug 14 2023
I am so sorry.
FALSExCURE
14:23 Aug 14 2023
My deepest condolences for your loss.
CountessLili
14:54 Aug 14 2023
My deepest sympathy to you and your family.
EternalRat
15:35 Aug 14 2023
Sharing in your tears. He was the sweetest soul, and always bought a smile to my face. My little lover of cheese. *hugs*
SireWallFlower
16:32 Aug 14 2023
I'm truly sorry for your loss.
CuRsEdToDaRkNeSs
17:29 Aug 14 2023
I am so sorry for your loss! You are in my thoughts!
Nekirena
01:19 Aug 16 2023
I am so so sorry.
Pai was a joyous little guy that was always such a beautiful soul. The love that overflowed every time you spoke of him, truly reached those of us who have had the pleasure of watching (albeit online) grow and mature alongside you. My heart aches for you.
dwaynemcgriff01
19:03 Aug 20 2023
im so sorry to hear about your loss. i will keep you in my thoughts.