It was Tuesday- I knew it, how, that I don't know... A sudden rush came to me... overwhealming all of my sane thoughts, someone is going to die... someone I don't know, so why should I have cared to know this information... why? Because practically everyone I know, knew him... Bizzare, I suppose... What is going on? What is happening in my head? Why am I seeing these things, DREAMING these things... First I was seeing them where there was something else there... now, I'm seeing them when nothing's there- who are they, what do they want? Why do I see them? And, why is it only out of the corner of my eye, why can't I atleast see them clearly??? It's all driving me MAD!
By the way... why doesn't my brain ever shut up?!
(I wrote this one day about a year ago... this guy Andrew died one night and I was working over nights and I freaked out cuz I knew someone was going to die... later that day at school I found out Andrew hung himself... or was hung... that's yet to be concluded... everyone I went to school with knew him, my cousin was like a brother to him... I never met him, but I knew the moment he died... I was seeing spirits around me... stalking me... I was prety freaked out about it at this point in my life... It doesn't bother me anymore.)
So, I had the greatest dream of my life last night- it was the place and people I'd been looking for all my life. But, something horrible happened and took it all away. I could not find them again- the place was closed- abandoned. He gave me directions, but I didn't know where to go. I was lost in a strange town of narrow, wet cobblestone alleys, flashing neon signs- quiet... strangely quiet... vacant. Perhaps, Paris- creepy but cool vibe. His name went unmentioned, but I knew the moment our souls touched that he was the love of my life- though we only briefly met- lost already behind the bend in a dark alley way, perhaps never to be found again. I know him, you may not... A dark poet ahead of his time, though I could not figure out what his time may have been. A complete mystery- a tragedy- Love... Lost across the ages? If I wanted to chase it, where would I start? Which direction would I go, maybe one that doesn't exist on my plane of existance... perhaps one that pushes inwards through the fabric of time. Shattering our very being... I will find him, no matter what it takes- would he still carry these remarkable qualities that first drew me to him or would they have been left behind in another time and place- that one where we first met. Where his dark eyes penetrated my soul and we both saw through to eachother's core- everything that we were and knowing it was meant to be- hungering for eachother and nothing more! Torn apart in an instant, which I don't even remember. The events are hazy to me... something horrible and sudden- a quick whispering of detailed instruction and he was gone- as if he hadn't even been before me a second before... Vanished into thin air, replaced only by sadness- a heavy feeling on my chest. he's gone... A lump in my throught and a sudden panic, which I don't know that it's caused by the disappearance of my long awaited lover, or by the rattling haze of the world around me. What is going on? I don't care, I just want to find him once more! Wake up.
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