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Me and my wife said vows in what most people would say a very short time knowing each other in 2005 on July 29th.



We met without seeing each other first. We met over the phone and would talk for hours, for a month, until the day we saw each other face to face, love at first sight, even though we loved each other before we saw each other also, but we fell in love once our eyes met :) Funny thing is we dreamed of each other faces before we even came face to face. So you can imagine the shock we both was in when we met. I can't believe she looked exactly like the girl in my dreams. At that very moment I looked at her I knew she was the one. She told me she dreamed about me a few times even the night before we met in person. When she saw me she was in so much shock she could barly look me in the eyes. lol I wondered why she wouldn't really look at me. Once she told me that I understood & shocked her even more when I told her I had dreams of her also.



I gave her a ring after being in a relationship with her for only 6 days. I wanted to ask her then but felt it was way too soon and she would say no, so I just said it was a promise ring lol. She told me if I would not have been afraid and asked her then she would have said yes because she fell in love with me the first day she met me :) I did too.



We were together 3 weeks before she asked me to marry her & I was going to ask her the following week (I wanted to be together a whole month first) but she beat me to it lol. We said vows 2 months later. I'm still shocked I married someone after being together only 3 months (and only 4 months of knowing her altogether) lol. I dont regret it though she is the best thing to ever happen to my life & i never doubt she is the "one". Here it is almost 2 years we have been together & I know there will be plenty more to come. I can't wait until she has a baby for me or we adopt one :)

I went to visit my baby in her new place today. I spent all day with her and the kids. Everything went the way I wanted it too. I didnt get there as early as I wanted to so I got there around the time the kids was getting ready for there nap. She was in her mom's apartment (she lives in the same building) her mom kept the kids down there as they took their nap. We went back to her apartment alone. I laid in her bed with her and listened to some slow jams while she changed into something comfortable. We laid there holding each other & making out. We both got so turned on and you know what happened next...amazing sex! Afterwards she cooked dinner & I got the kids from her mom so they could eat. It was nice having a family dinner just us. Later we played the playstation (who wants to be a millionaire) of course my wife kicked my ass in it lol. She put the kids to bed and we relaxed in her room enjoying each other until it was time for me to go. I can't wait to do it again....better yet I can't wait until we get a house together and can enjoy each other everyday.

So much on my mind. So many life changing decisions to make. I'm so confused...



It's so hard to trust people and open myself up to them. I hate wondering when someone will fuck me over again. I hate not knowing who I can really trust and believe in. The one person I knew for over ten years and thought this is a person that I can completely trust and open myself up too left me & doesn't miss me or even call to see if I'm breathing. If she can do it, why would it be hard for anyone else too.



My life is full of people I love leaving me and turning their backs on me. There are few that feel they can go and return when ever they want and I will except them back with open arms. That's not going to happen anymore ever. Once you say fuck me, I will say fuck you and you are gone from my life for good. I don't need constant disappointment and hurt. If I'm going to be sad I don't need anyone adding to it. Fuck that shit. This goes for anyone friends or family.



It's a shame my family did me worse than any enemy could. I have no blood family only few are on my good side and yet still I keep them at a distance for my safety.



I'm slowly going insane and I know it. I won't deny it anymore. Every time things look up shit happens and I get depressed again & again. I give up, why fight it anymore....Fuck everything & everyone that did me wrong when I didn't deserve it! I've been biting my tongue and being good to people that just fuck me over again & again! Then say they love me....fucking lies!! I'm so sick of it all! People loving me is nothing but a curse. It seems it will always end up bad.

I'm getting over this cold. Thank God..my dad was scaring me making me think I had lumonia! (spelled that wrong I know lol) Because it was hard to breath & I had pain in my chest but I think it was just a bad flu. The only thing bothering me now is my nose. I wish I could rip it off.



Damn I wanted to go out to the club tonight with my friends. I was excited that I was feeling better thinking I was going out tonight & my wife quickly stepped on that dream lol. She said I wasn't going anywhere because I just got over my cold and she meant it. There's no changing her mind. I'm kinda pissed I've been stuck in the house for almost two weeks grrrr. That's ok, next weekend I won't be in here at all.

I'm still sick and I feel like it has gotten worse. Now my damn throat is sore! Plus my ear hurts which is cause of my throat, well thats what I'm told sounds weird to me lol. I can't breath and I feel like ripping off my nose hoping that will make some air come in or let the mucus out lol. My wife has to make time to take care of me before I fall over & die. I need her healing touch of love. I really don't want to go to the doctors but I may have to. Grrrr this sucks!!

Well today was supposed to be the day my dad meets my wife's kids but it's not gonna happen today. I know he is going to be upset when he gets my message telling him it will be another day. I haven't had much time alone with my wife this week and today was a good day to do so, plus their dickhead father wants to have them today since he doesnt have to work, so I guess it works out for us but not for my dad. Hopefully we will have the chance to take the kids up there tomorrow.

Well I'm glad me and my wife had ours on the 10th (Saturday) instead because I ended up getting really sick the day before Valentines day. This weather has been so crazy, one min it's chili, the next it's freezing, then it's kinda warm lol. I saw a cold coming miles away. My baby took care of me though, she brought me some medicine and made me take all of it. She held me and caressed me while kissing me all over my face. lol she knows I like to be babied when I'm sick so of course I loved it.



I just hope I feel better by this weekend and that at least some of the snow is cleared up because me and my wife have plans to take the kids to my dad's house, he really wants to meet them.

Me and my baby celebrated valentine's day today because she has to work and go to a meeting on valentine's day. We had so much fun all day. I'm glad I already had brought her V-day stuff early so I gave it to her and she loved it. I got her a pretty stuffed white tiger holding a heart that says "I love you" and a card that I also wrote a short letter to her in it. Of course I got her chocolates. While we were out she dipped off into a store and got me a cute stuffed puppy that is holding a bone in it's mouth that says "I love you" on it and a box of chocolates. I loved it, even though I didnt want her to get me anything, I just wanted to spoil her today.



I took her to the movies, we saw "Hannibal Rising" awesome fucking movie! I love every Hannibal Lector movie. Anyway, she brought the dinner though. We really enjoyed ourselves after the movie heheh we creeped into the ladies bathroom and I fucked her in one of the stalls. (yeah I put my "strap-on" on before we left the house, it was planned) I knew I was going to have sex with her in public because it was one of her fantasies and what better time to do it. I felt so paranoid walking around with that big thing on, I kept feeling like someone was going to notice it through my jeans lol. I swear a lady across from us while we were eating saw it, it looked like she looked right at it lol. I'm not sure but maybe. When we got back to my house we watched another movie and cuddled on the couch talking about how good the day went :)

I truly always believed in karma and damn karma is a bitch! Those assholes I used to live with (my so called family) that treated me and my wife like shit with their verbal & physical attacks on us just because we are lesbians. They fucked with us until the day they finally kicked me out. Well I knew all that shit was going to come back to them hard.



So many things started happening and going wrong for them. My grandfather really hurt me by letting my cousins fight me and mess with us. Plus him kicking me out without even telling me anything. He is really getting the karma bad. He let one of the cousins that was fucking with me move in the house and that bitch stole his bank card and took all his money. Now she is no where to be found. He keeps getting sick. The other asshole that lives there, they think he stole my grandfather's car and sold it. Plus, one of them or both of them got 2 credit cards in his name and used them up. They don't even have the money to pay the mortgage.



One of my friends is also friends with a cousin of mine, not one of the cousins that we were fighting, anyway, she told me my cousin was telling her about the stuff that happened and she said she told my cousin, "that's what they get it's just karma for what they did!", she told me, my cousin didn't even say anything after that because I'm sure she and everyone else know that shit is true. They are getting exactly what they deserve.



I did not deserve the treatment I got while living there. Me and my wife did nothing but be nice to them and helped them. We were the only ones that cleaned up and brought food and shared with everyone.



I had to leave a 32" TV there because at the time I had no where to put it. My grandfather has been using it. Now that me and my wife are ready to move and she needs the TV I am getting it from him. My mother had the nerve to tell me I should be nice and let him keep the TV. Is she fucking dumb? Why would I let him have anything from me especially a big TV!? He doesnt deserve shit from me and wouldn't had it in the first place if I had some where to put it at first. There's no way I would put him before my wife EVER! She needs another TV and she is getting it. Fuck him and the rest of my family that took their side. May they all get what's coming to them.

Me and my wife were talking about this chick, I used to work with not that long ago, that "liked" me. This one day was so funny and scary lol when my wife came up to my job to surprise me right before it was time for me to get off. My boss decided to call a short staff meeting before we all left so my wife joined us at the table and waited. She was sitting right next to me and this bitch knew who my wife was but I guess she decided to test her or maybe she looked at her and saw how pretty & feminine she looked and thought she wasn't much of a threat LOL "Big mistake!!" This chick walks over to me giggling & a flirtatious manner, ya know how women do, and asking me to buy her a soda and some candy out of the vending machine and she started rubbing my shoulder as she begged me to do it. WTF I was thinking omg is this bitch stupid or retarded. First off, why would I spend my money on another bitch anyway, specially in front of my wife and it's clear the hoe is being flirtious with me. Second is the bitch smoking crack rubbing on me while my baby is sitting right next to me! Well I almost shit myself when I saw the look in my wife's eyes, I thought she is really going to hurt this girl in front of my boss and I'm going to get fired for sure. My wife grabbed the hoe's hand and bent it back far enough to really hurt and throw her hand away from me. LOL Everyone had this look on their faces like omg Lucky's wife is going to kill this poor woman. I was just giving the girl a look like please don't get yourself hurt, walk away LOL. The bitch got afraid and she did walk away lmao she didnt even sit back down at the table with us to finish the meeting lol she completely left & didnt say anything. At that point everyone relaxed and took a reliving sigh like as if saying to themselves "Thank God!".

I've been saying how awesome my wife has been these few weeks and it's been pretty consent. Well, until yesterday, me and her got into a really big fight, I don't even remember how it got so bad. We were trying out different songs for her to do in the next show and we were seriously bumping heads. I felt she wasn't trying her best or putting much effort into the songs and she felt I was being to mean & demanding. Eventually this resulted in a major blow out.



We actually got physical, I pushed her head and she shoved me and throw me over the couch LOL I forgot how strong she is to be so much smaller than me. Plus it didnt help that I didnt fight back when she was grabbing & pushing me because I under estimated her & didnt think she was going to do much but push me a bit lol. After landing on my back on the couch i was pretty pissed and throw a soft punch in her direction, not actually trying to hit her hard of course, while kicking and screaming. She said I looked like a bug kicking and swinging my arms and legs like they do when u knock em on their backs lmao. After I got up, we then rumbled into the bedroom. I slammed her onto the bed and jumped on top of her grabbing her neck choking her. She flipped off the bed trying to get away. After she got up off the floor she tackled me on the bed and we rolled around scratching and pulling each other's hair. She rolled on top of me and began to slap & choke me. I push her off and grabbed her close to me, some how we started kissing passionately & ripping off clothes.



lmao it was like a crazy scene from a movie. Needless to say after the hot crazy sex we were back to our so in love selves and back to the romance LOL.