LibidinousLuke's Vampire Journal

LibidinousLuke's Journal

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A grandmother's wisdom
22:53 Jun 23 2012
Times Read: 480

A nice old story with a different twist - will make you appreciate family.

My grandmother died in the 60s, but her birthday

is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce.

The long walks we used to take to the store in town,

the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like

pulling weeds or washing the sidewalk...

Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was about 13.

We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day.

She told me that, one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family. 'And always remember this, she said. Be sure you marry a woman with small hands.'

'How come, Grandma?' I asked her.

She answered in her soft Newfoundland voice.

'Makes your dick look bigger.'

Kinda brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

COMMENTS

Isis101
02:45 Jun 24 2012

OMG - LMAO!

Luke, Luke, Luke...

SchrodingersCat
06:45 Jun 24 2012

LOL reminds me of a show I was watching the other day when people were being asked what the most memorable advice they received from their grandparents was. The best: "Stay away from any guy that spends more time in the mirror than in you."

The meaningless jobs brings back some memories, too. My cousin and I used to get paid a penny a rock to clear rocks out of the garden at our great-grandparent's house. A nickel if they were bigger than a baseball.