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water streams

through my ears,

whistling

sea breeze

slips through

my hair,

miles apart.

waves breaking

tossing

satisfying

earthly desires,

miles apart.

floating

bobbing

the tide

dragging

throwing

reviving my

dead heart,

miles apart.

bloated and

pale

I seen I

have drowned,

miles apart.

take back your blood splattered shoes

im in no mood dear

not to be romanced

at the sound of misery

you claim to be god

and i laught at your stupidity

but my sweetness wake up and smell the roses

im not here to love

but to twist your life

into sad and dreadful sorrows

where you weep at me feet

a tale of wonderful and forsaken woes

hardwood floors beckon thy feet

where u tremble and kiss the path

that my own self shall walk upon

I know u care not for any other man

I posess you

therefore you shall give my every need

and in return i shall beat you

rape you and make you bleed

just for my amusement

I am a sad clown

in the path of righteousness

o fuck me

Take this knife and stab me 10 times,

I can't feel a thing, Can you?

I bite into your skin as I watch you kill me.

As my teeth break your skin, and sever the veins, you ever so slightly flinch,

We say our sorries and lie clenching to one another.

Finally the pain comes to me and tears fall down my face,

From my eyes, over my cheeks and onto your chest.

You brush my hair back with your hand, and you put your lips on my forehead.

Forever it seems, we stay like this; clenched together, me in your arms.

The blood is flowing out of my chest, so dark,

The blood is running out of your neck. so sweet.

As we bleed together I whisper into your ear, "Baby, let's leave here"

And so we hurried to die.

You whispered to me as I grew still, "Sugar, let's get buried"

The blood trickled out, my blood, your blood, mixing on the floor.

Crying, we kissed. to make it our last,

And we smiled as we held each other until the end

In the valley of the kings

we are cursed with tiny flecks of our makeshift oblivion.

Sometimes I'm left alone.

Sometimes I'm left alone in my room.

When this happens I tend to contemplate

and I came to the conclusion

that I'm not happy with this whole breathing thing.

I mean, all that energy that's placed in

inhaling

and

exhaling

just doesn't seem worth it anymore, y'know?

I mean, I'm sure there are more pressing matters

that can be tended to instead of allowing

my lungs to gain access to polluted air.

So I've decided I will stop.

I know if God's real, God must hate me.

I know if the devil is real, the devil must want me.

I wonder are they real?

I could never be to sure what people, or things say.

For me the bible is just to scare people.

To make you do the things they want.

Just to trick, by saying your going to hell.

I've done so much things, I'm not dead yet.

What would it take for me to see if God is real.

Maybe I should shoot my self, see where I end up.

But then again I might be wrong.

Their might be a God, their might be a devil.

But to me it seems to hard believe.

I guess I'll find out in the end.

And if they are real, well I know one thing.

I'm going to hell, and that's the end

People get scared of the things they know of.

The death that they know that soon they have to face.

They wonder what’s after death.

How the death is like.

But I wonder how my death is gong to be.

Would it hurt.

I'm going to get killed.

Die a Normal death.

Or be hanged from a tree.

To be left. For people could see my death.

I'm wasn’t like this before.

I love to do thing, good things.

But I changed.

Because I’m Ray.

My life is hard to define.

IF you could define it.

That means you must be just like me

Carve the way to your vein

Cut through your skin

Act like your insane

And imagine its him

The one that caused this pain

The dickhead

The one they call Shane

The one you wish were dead

Watch it bleed

Oh Shit!! The blade broke

Another one you’ll need

Start cutting again

Look at all the blood

Flowing like the rain

It could create a flood

Slice up and down

Don’t stop

Don’t frown

Imagine its him

Your getting revenge

Cutting through his skin

Until its his end

Be strong

Put up a fight

He did the wrong

Now its your last night

Try not to cry

You’ll be better off

You always wanted to die

Now you are

I’m so proud

You even made it this far

Lay down

Rest your arm

Coz soon you will be found...