Honor: 0 [ Give / Take ]
10 entries this month
To Chaz!
21:12 Jul 30 2007
Times Read: 820
Chaz,
I'm super proud of you. You're stopping the cutting, You really are. You're ahead of it. That first time is always the hardest. And you did it. You didn't let the urges overcome you and you kept your head. I'm Proud Chazie, really fucking proud. Hortencia is just as proud as I am. You can get through this, Hortencia and I will always be there to help you out when it gets hard. Remember, come to us, we are always here.
This was just to let Chaz and the world know how well she's doing. She's really beating it and it makes me smile. GREAT JOB CHAZ!! Keep it up, kid.
02:17 Jul 30 2007
Times Read: 826
Have you ever felt like you didn't matter to anyone, or that you did matter but only to one person? Well today I feel like if it weren't for Hortencia, Justin wouldn't matter to anyone....
Daily Dose of Truth!
18:35 Jul 29 2007
Times Read: 830
Hortencia is my Eternal Lover. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I love her more then anything. I LOVE YOU ANGEL FACE!
Every Single Day
12:13 Jul 26 2007
Times Read: 838
She's done it again. Hortencia, my love, you cease to amaze me. Yet another day of pure, complete, undying happiness. What would I do without you? It's simple. I wouldn't do anything. I'd be nothing. That's what I mean when I say I need you. I want you in my life. I have to have you in my life. You and you and you and ONLY you! Mon Deiu, what good deed did I do in order to receive such an angel, such perfection, such beauty. I'm simply baffeled at that. No clue but whatever in the bluest of blue hell it was I'm sure has hell glad I did it. Glad I didn't miss it due to lazines or illness. Thank whatever higher power happens to be responsible for my meeting her. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! Hortencia, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me and you are my EVERYTHING! Without you I'm half whole and who the hell wants to live as half a man. I sure as hell don't. That and you make me so happy! You really do. Honey, you are the reason that I have the strenght to help everyone I help. You. You give me that power, that courage, that wit, and that heart to do so. You are responsible for every single happy emotion I've ever felt in the past 6 almost 7 months. My Love, I'm yours. I'm 100% yours. No one and nothing will ever come between us. Guys, she's awesome. She's amazing, and she's a Goddess. She makes me the happiest man on earth, EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!
My Everything.
11:36 Jul 25 2007
Times Read: 846
It comes to pass that not everyone will find true love right when they want to. Hell, I've been through 4 failed girlfriends. It happens to us all. They never ever seem to have what we are looking for. Well for me I need look no further.
January 6th 2007 was one of if not the best day of my life. I met a wonderful person on here and little did I know how much she'd impact my life. She's amazing. She's funny. She's intelligent. She's caring. She knows me just as well as I know me. She's beautiful. She's couragous. She's my everything. Now. I know if you've read any of my recent entries you'll know whom I'm refering to. Let me just tell you incase you have not. HORTENCIA, Of course! My one and only! She's my life, my world, my universe, my soul. She completes me. She's the other half in my jigsaw puzzle that is life. She's so much more then I could have ever thought or imagined I'd ever find in a girlfriend. She's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. She's that special and important to me. So if you meet someone whom means as much to you as she does to me, then pray, do hold on to them. Gifts like that only come once in a life time. Thanks Hortencia. I love you. I'm in love with you. I'm yours.
Happiness.01:00 Jul 17 2007
Times Read: 859
Happiness is something most people find for only breif moments in life. Happiness is something very few own. I'm sure, if you've talked to me in the past few months, you've noticed I've changed. The Good kind of change. I've realized, I'm Justin Howe, damn it. I'm a God. I can do whatever the fuck I want to. Why, not rule my own life, no? Well I'm doing just that. Soon my lover will be in my arms, my happiness complete and no one can kill it. I own happiness now. I have happiness beyond measurement. Hortencia, You've done that. You've given me that happiness, and I hope I give you every ounce back. Im CrAzY in love with you and you are indeed my everything. My all things, My.. Ooops almost let it slip again. I'll tell you soon lover I love you Angel Face! ~kisses and hugs to my Girlfriend Hortencia~
--Justin, Shadowed Sorrow--
Something you should all know.
10:00 Jul 04 2007
Times Read: 889
For those of you who don't know, Justin belongs to Hortencia! I'm hers. No one else's. I love her. I'm in love with her. I cannot stress this enough. She deserves the best in life, the happiness that makes her giddy. She deserves to be loved and cherished, honored and valued. Treasured and protected, respected and admired. She's one of a kind and I plan on giving her all those things she deserves. I'll never ever do anything but make her happy. After all a Goddess deserves a smile on her face, no?
Mon Dieu! She's done it again!!!!
19:18 Jul 03 2007
Times Read: 897
Hortencia I love you! My god, sometimes Mon Deiu doesn't cut it! You make me so fucking happy! Oh my god. Well first I'll tell you all what she's done to make me so happy other then be herself.
This morning I awoke to find my father with a Box from her to me. Inside was something amazing. A red dragon breathing fire. Only it wasn't fire, that dragon was breathing a blade, behold a dragon dagger. Now first and formost I love blades of any kind. Knives, swords, and yes, Daggers! And here is one from someone I love more then anyone else walking this earth, burried below it, or ever destined to set foot, eyes, or even smell the world and she's sent me something I love. This means more to me then any of you will ever know. She's given me a blade that will last forever, will stay with me forever, that will follow me to the end of the world. She's given me something with to battle my mortal demons, to protect those I love (Mainly her) like a proper Knight should. She's given me something out of love and caring and I'll never ever be able to pay her back for that except by loving and caring about her just as much. I'll never be able to tell her how much I love her. She's forever my angel. She's my savior. She's my antidrug and my addiction all rolled into one. She's amazing and I can't stop smiling! I know, he's ranting right? Well you're damned straight I'm ranting because this whole fucking world needs to know she's awesome. She's amazing, she's wonderful and she's my everything. Do you hear that world? HORTENCIA IS MY EVERYTHING!!!! I'd shout it off Mount Everest. I'd write it in grafeti on the foreheads of Mount Rushmore. I'd tell everyone who'd listen and those who wouldn't I'd tell anyways. She makes me complete. She's my other half and I FUCKING LOVE HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you angel face for giving me something so thought out, so carefully selected, so exquisitly perfect, so loving, just because you wanted to. Even though you didn't have to you wanted to and that means a lot. Far more then I can put here in words. Thank you for everything. For being you, for loving me, for caring, and for making me complete. I'm yours forever. Always, and all time. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU!!!!!
Hardship...
02:01 Jul 02 2007
Times Read: 906
Today has been a long hard day. Hortencia's texts made it so much more tolorable. I argued a lot with people. Not just my family. It's actually been a pretty good day so far offline. It's been on messenger and on here that I've argued with people. Seems like they all want to push my buttons and those who know how to want to hurt my soul and heart. Well to tell you the truth I'm done being the one who's hurting all the time. I'm above that. I've said it in my profile today when I updated it. I'm a God and It's about time I started acting like one. So to all of you out there who want to just hurt and chip and injure the soul and heart of me, do us all a favor and put that running of the mouth to use. Because you can't do it any longer. I won't allow it. Have a good evening. This new me rocks.
Ugh, People! ~shakes his fist~
00:32 Jul 01 2007
Times Read: 807
Why is it that people do things that are way crazy just because they think it will numb the pain of something else? Why do they think that the problem they are running from will be gone or somewhat easier after a hit from a blunt or some weed laced with E? Why does alcohol seem to some to be a way out when in reality it is only the way to hardship? I know some people like that and it bothers me. They know the things they do will hurt others, me mainly, yet they do it anyway. Is it that they don't care or that they cannot help themselves? I lean toward the formost of the two. They don't care. At least that's what I can gather from it. If you love someone and they ask you, plead with you, beg you practically not to do something, and you do it over and over again, does that fucking "I'm sorry, Justin" bullshit still mean the same? No, I'll answer for you, It doesn't. It never has again and it never will, again. It's an over used sentence like "I'll be right there!" or "Got cha." or "Whatever." it's something you hear so often you think, "Well, Hell since everyone says it, I'll start saying it." and so you do but you don't know the meaning. It's like when a little kid hears the word "Fuck" alot he or she will go about saying it when they really can't fathom what they are saying they just want to imitate others. Well "I'm sorry" is just the same, people say it without meaning it or without, in most cases not all, even knowing what they are saying. They don't know what the words mean, they just know they sound good. It's Blasphy if you ask me. Crazy to say "I'm sorry" if you're not. And why continue to hurt that person who asked you not to do the things you do over and over again? BE A FUCKING MAN OR WOMAN AND DO NOT MAKE PROMISES YOU CANNOT KEEP! Goddamn, it drives me mad!
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